Sidebars 200 -- 210



SIDEBAR 200 (Yes--I'm just making up #'s now)


February 2015


(...last month we were...)


Reading: I read a lot of shit that I write/wrote myself, and it's pretty good. At times it appears that I almost have a clue. Ha; who knew?..So we're going to read some in 2015, huh? Well then we will read more about doing meditation, more about writing comedy, and some about juggling. Read my hairy white ass.

Watching: 2014 sitcoms are all different now; "You're The Worst" was way above average; hope it comes back for a 2nd season..."Udateable" has (Portland comic) Ron Funches in it, and will be back for a 2nd season (March)...

Class Projects: We have watched a couple of "Brain Games", and all of our regulars like Castle. Waiting for Dr. Who to come back, too...

movies together: Since 6-2014, we have not watched any movies together--she doesn't have that kind of time. Wait--I lied. We re-watched the first Star Trek movie while her parents were here in October, 2014.

Shit I watch alone: everything. "Man Seeking Woman" is pretty good. So is the SyFy show "12 Monkeys".

Comedians: every Fri. and Sat. night Comedy Central is running new/recent specials by many great comics. And Thank You!

Crappy cable movies: Ted,

Play it Again's: Diehard 2,

Watching and Hearing: Ferguson is off the Late Late Show, Larry Wilmore (?) is doing The Nightly Show after Jon Stewart's Daily Show. I can barely keep up.

Now with faster than dial-up internet; Youtubing: I am watching juggling videos!

Hearing: 22 CD's on my desk.

New on the radio; my new car doesn't have a radio (yet).

Musical Purchases this month from the Tom Tucker discount wall at Skip's Records And CDWorld; my future place of employment, and permanent Barbie Dream Home: I got the new Jack White CD.

Out and About: 11-?-14; "Praise You" at Fred Meyer. 1-27-15; "Under The Milky way Tonight" at Fred Meyer,

Singing: (1-30-15) Stranger--Starship,

What I want today: I'm going to have to come back to this.

New stuff this month or so: What; like the past 6 months? 1-12-15; with my 30 cents off discount, I filled my gas tank at 1.81 per gallon...Also in 1-15 Skymall has gone bankrupt. Boo...

This Month of bargain-shopping (Dollar Tree, Cash King, Big Lots, etc.): I slalom between wanting to get good products (pricey), or cheaper products for a lower price. I am now a much bigger fan of store-brands (like Fred Meyer 'Simple Truth' items) than just stocking up on crap at Dollar Stores.

Occupational Hazards: Employment? I apparently still don't have a real job. Well, I never had a real job. So fuck you. BUT, I am now on the payroll at Blairally--even if it is just 4 hours per week.

Personal shit for my own memory banks this month: So I haven't been doing these things for at least 6 months, and it's going to take some catching up. Good for me...7-14; I did the extended trip to Florida to see Mom, Dad, and TPG. Dad and TPG are doing well. Mom is still very confrontational--not my problem...10-3-14; I ran over myself with my own van at Blairally. My insurance had to pay for everything; there was some bonus funding provided, and it did not end fairly. The arcade obviously disrespected me; so let's wait and see how I will respond to that. Also; since the incident, with left leg and right arm problems, it has been a a long set of physical difficulties since then. I am also losing some sensation in the lower half of my body (Oh fun!)... I quit smoking cigarettes on 12-10-14 (I was going to have to stop smoking for 2 weeks in middle earth anyway; so I just stopped smoking a week early, and have not started back. Yay me)...Mom quit teaching on 1-9-15...I chipped another tooth during vacation in Iowa 12-20-14 WHILE flossing...Wait for it...then chipped another tooth on 1-23-15 (yes) WHILE flossing. I love my teeth, and flossing! Someday; these will be the 'good old days' of 2015; when I still had 4 or 5 teeth to smile through. Seriously; let's yank these fuckers out and fit me for dentures already...

11-14; I was car-shopping. Missed my chance to drive a '96 Saturn station wagon (bummer). Then I lucked out and found an incredibly well taken-care-of '93 Buick Century (of an 85 yr. old woman) for under $2K, so it's mine now. It's a case of; no, this was not the exact car I was looking for. But it was SUCH a good car, in great shape, and I couldn't let another good one get away (this is also how I got my van Gus, back in '97). I also got to drive the new Buick to Portland, and see TPG/Ground Kontrol for a night!

The plane rides back from middle earth (late December 2014) were great--no problems of any kind in that 10 degree bullshit...1-13-15 started the physical therapy on my right shoulder. Go me! My Dr. is Molly...

Pinball and Golden Tee stuff: The first ever (Pinball Outtreach Project) "POP" Pinball tournament at Blairally happened on 10-18-14, with Cheri's parents in town. And I won it, because I am cool...Whatever night it was (late December/early January), I put over 1 billion on Blairally's Getaway pinball. Woo...Sunday 1-11-15 I put 1.2 billion on The Addam's Family at Level Up...2-28-15 will be the NW OH-PIN at Blairally...

Poker stuff: (late 2014) The Sunday night bartender at my poker game has been sabotaging my food and drink, so I will neither be drinking nor eating there anymore; and, no poker until after the Superbowl anyway...

Grammar: I give up. It ain't me who can't communicate.

New foods this month: organic cabbage is good. Brussels sprouts are, too.

This month of Blues Jamming: No. We need to end this category. No we don't: Saturday 1-10-15 I went to Mac's to see Heavy Chevy do their video shoot/concert. It was great to see Brian, Axel, Darcy, Janie, + T-Mart again!..

My trials and trib.s as a critical believer in the concept of God: I believe, loosely as it may be. And Edgar Cayce also believes--that's good enough for me!

What's different here than in college town: These used to be relevant, but not now.

What's different here than dumbass Arizona: Same here.

How Does Your Garden Grow? (Tales from our community garden plot): We are renting our plot for one more year! I plan to actually do some stuff with it this year.

Life with Static Girl: She is incredible, and she has a very high tolerance for my crap.

My FCP has this for me: She answered my e-mail (first one in months) in less than 24 hours. I dare say that she still likes me!

Comments From The Peanut Gallery: The news is such a joke. Of course I am jaded, but it should NOT take a rocket physicist to see some of this obvious shit: Sony was worried that some B movie called "The Interview" would suck at the box office (like all movies do now--thank you internet!), so a plot was organized (by Sony, shhh) to promise revenge on any theatres/patrons showing the film. THIS is movie marketing in late 2014; trying to get people to go watch a movie JUST to piss somebody else off (don't fall for it)...Gas prices have come down to under $2 a gallon, and the talking heads on tv are all a'glow about it! There was no reason for this price drop to suddenly happen, just like there was no reason for gas prices to double in 2008, mmmkay? What this means is that gas prices should have never gone ABOVE $2.30 per gallon, EVER! The Gas Lords have been dry-fucking us up the ass for many, many years...Late 2014; 28% of Americans think we're heading in the right direction; and, Congress' approval rating is at 13%. Nice!..

A thought to take with you: If the government wants money, and ALL governments do, then they should: tax all churches, anybody who makes over $5 million per year pays 20% in taxes, kill the timber industry and make them all responsible for growing hemp, bring back better electric cars than the EV1 and convert all train tracks to electric trains. (This shit is easy!)

Oregon Bumper Stickers: No. There are bumper sticker websites now (again--thanks internet!)

Band names: Static Girl did not say the actual words "Ruined Teflon", but there it is.






SIDEBAR 201

March 2015


(...last month we were...)


Reading: So this book "Food Babe" book came out on 2-10-15, I think. It's another 'Omigosh, the corporates are trying to kill us with their food!' story. But she recommends going totally organic, and that's cool. Good for her.

Watching: Jon Stewart is leaving The Daily Show; he's been there since '99, right?

Class Projects: Castle, Brain Games, Outrageous Acts of Science, The Young Ones!, Unsealed: Alien Files about Mt. Shasta (she hated it),

movies together: I cannot even make her sit still for an hour, much less 90 minutes.

Shit I watch alone: a great Superbowl 49, with the Patriots winning it!..The Blacklist might be my favorite show on tv right now. It entertains me like "Wiseguy" did back in the 80's...I also like "12 Monkeys" on Syfy...There was a porno "Intergalactic Swingers" that has my favorite pornstar in it; blonde w/pig tails. No, I don't know her name. Her loss..."Man Seeking Woman" on FX is pretty good, too (is Lorne Michaels involved in that? And Eric Andre is extremely versatile.)...I watched "What Could Possibly Go Wrong?" and it was like TPG and I had a tv show...SNL's 40th Anniversary show was good...I was told to check out The Vikings on History Channel...2-20-15 Friday; I had a "You're The Worst" marathon..."This Is Not Happening" late night on Comedy Central is good, and edgy.

Comedians on tv: Kyle Kinane (from the 40 Watt in Athens), Ari Shaffir (also hosts "THis Is Not Happening"), Neal Brennan, Matt Braunger "Big Dumb Animal", Pete Holmes "Nice Try, The Devil", comedians on Youtube--Bill Burr "I'm Sorry You Feel That Way", old Bill Hicks from the 80's

Crappy cable movies: Tower Heist, The Midnight Meat Train...Hang on; there was a remake of The Amityville Horror back in 2005 with Ryan Reynolds? The Amityville Horror was a hoax, right? So; why would, why DID, ANYONE want to remake an average fictional movie from the late 70's? It had the old Brolin (James?), and a hot-as-shit Margot Kidder, right?

Play it Again's: Hellboy, Diehard 2, Inglorious Basterds, American: The Bill Hicks Story, Bill Hicks: It's Just a Ride, Leatherface; Texas Chainsaw Massacre III, Moneyball, Knight and Day,

Watching and Hearing: The first season of "You're The Worst" is on Youtube, so are most episodes of Archer (Archer is also coming to Comedy Central in March 2015).

Now with faster than dial-up internet; musical Youtubing: ALL of the VH-1 'Behind The Musics' are on Youtube; ALL of them; Van Halen, Styx, etc...Yeah, and I've watched a couple of Pink Floyd Youtube docu-stories, too...Juggling videos...

Hearing: Only 4 CD's on my desk 2-28-15: "Broken"--NIN, (self-titled) Crystal Method, "Significant Other"--Limp Bizkit, and the Big Data EP,

New on the radio; radio? I don't even have radio in my new car (yet)! Computer stuff? There may be a 'Kindle App' for my Samsung Galaxy Tab 3 (SGT3) so that I can read free/cheap e-books.

Musical Purchases this month from the Tom Tucker discount wall at Skip's Records And CDWorld; my future place of employment, and permanent Barbie Dream Home: not yet

Out and About: "Hey Jealousy" (Gin Blossoms) at Fred Meyer, "Madness" (Muse) at Fred Meyer, Sirius "The Blend" at Carl's Jr. and my new dentist, Oh My Gosh! Say what you want about Wal-Mart, but during 3rd shift they play an Alternative internet station; I heard Cake's "The Distance", and "Banditos" which is Roger Clyne + (the Refreshments?),

Singing: It's All I Can Do--The Cars, (The darkness is you) You've Got A Black Black Heart--Caviar, "Baby Love"--Mother's Finest, "Wild, Sweet, Cool"--Crystal Method, "You Took The Words Right Out Of My Mouth"--Meatloaf, "Had A Dream"--Roger Hodgson, "Mr. Blue Sky"--ELO, "The Pit"--Silversun Pickups, "Grey Cell Green"--Ned's Atomic Dustbin, "New Jack Hustler"--Ice T, 3 Stabbing Westward songs (In Eugene 3-6-15? Stay tuned!),

What I want today: A new computer monitor...2-24-15; I WILL be juggling 3 balls before April, 2015. Dammit!..

New stuff this month or so: last month maybe; I was set to almost eliminate soda from my consumption, and then the Wizards/Sadists of Mountain Dew went ape shit on me; 2WICE! Not only are the new "Kickstarts" excellent, but then they went old school (or 'throwback') with the classic funky green glass bottles of Mountain Dew--with real sugar! Looks like I'll still be drinking some more Mountain Dew...2-3-15; all medibles for me; no smoke or drink (expensive, but fun)...Coca Cola is now making milk; Fairlife. Ha!..

This Month of bargain-shopping (Dollar Tree, Cash King, Big Lots, etc.): I see that Sugarless Bubble Yum is being discontinued. Enjoy my expedited killing spree; I've got about 20 pieces left...I am trying to buy better things than my old regular Dollar Store stuff.

Occupational Hazards: Ha. I legally work at the Blairally Vintage Arcade now. All of, maybe, 4 hours per week; but I work there!..Cancel that. I do NOT work at Blairally. They are idiots. Deceptive? Oh, maybe a bit...

Personal shit for my own memory banks this month: One of the MANY reasons I got so lost in mid-2014 is the 'extended holding pattern' that my life has become; 'working' off the books as a janitor for only $100 a week, while still trying to party like I was not so broke (dumb). I had been pilfering from my little piles of pinball and poker winnings so much that I didn't realize I was down to my last $500 (from over $1500). I was barely maintaining exercise and health, while pretending that my diet was so excellent that I could do (or not do) anything else I wanted. Wrong!..We're still catching up from the many months we took off of Sidebars from May '14 to Feb. '15...I did some research in June '14, and in July '14 thought I had come up with the best computer tablet to get; a Samsung Galaxy Tab 3 ($140). I want to Skype (video chat), Brackelope (pinball tournaments), and for the unit to fit in my cargo pockets (not a full-sized tablet). Well; 2 out of 3 ain't bad. Brackelope is IPAD only (tablets are androids), and I still didn't/don't understand all the wizardry of an android. But I did Skype once, and the unit does fit in a large cargo pocket. I took it to Florida with me (7-14), and TPG got the SGT3 up and running with some music and a few apps. I am still learning how much I don't know and cannot do with my SGT3 everyday (2-15); I'm cool like that. Also; coming back from Florida in 7-14 I now own a Canon EOS 20D camera (the vintage 2005 model, b-day present from Mom)...

Having a life that is NOT connected to so many things does allow massive freedom, but also lacks meaningful involvement. My life. Hello.

2-4-15, Wednesday, BEST workout of the new year (so far). 2-5; checked out the "20 After Four" dispensary on Blair blvd. 2-12; finally got a new-to-me recycled 20 inch DELL monitor for $50. 2-13-15 was Friday the 13th; best workout of 2015 again!

Pinball and Golden Tee stuff: 2-5-15; physical therapy, then in the evening I made a spontaneous trip to Level Up for pinball; new Grand Champion on Ripley's Believe It Or Not (85 mil.), and new #2 on Walking Dead, (95 mil.) Go me!..2-7-15; back to Level Up for a new #2 on Medieval Madness (135 mil.)...Came in 3rd at Pinball Knights on 2-11-15 (12 people)...I won my own Pinball Knights on 2-18-15 (12 people)...2-25-15 Pinball Knights; 16 people, a full bracket! And Phil from Pendelton gave away tons of stuff...2-28-15; the 2015 Northwest Oh-Pin at Blairally. 1 Eugene person made the final 12, and it was not me. My run of 4 straight final 12's is over! Oh well...

Poker stuff: I have made the podium at poker on 2-8, 2-15 and 2-22-15, and 3-1-15. Yeah; so playing poker sober really benefits me...

Grammar: I give up. Having my own good grammar will become a personal statement. A choice. You fucking idiots can talk/write/text however you want...

New foods this month: We are going totally organic (like Food Babe); carrots, cucumbers (already), celery and tomatoes...We ordered our first pick-up vegan pizza from Mezza Luna (yum)...Not new this month, but new THIS CENTURY; the small black pepper grinders (plastic, sold with the regular salt/pepper shakers) are very convenient! And they may be refillable, too! More American jobs are disappearing!..

This month of Blues Jamming: we should change this to "comedy", since it is more likely that I will go to a comedy show than to a blues jam. And I MISSED a comedy show on Friday 2-20? near Blairally (at Wandering Goat) because of back pain and social anxiety (also--Friday night). Hey; if I don't feel right, then I don't go. Fuck you.

My trials and trib.s as a critical believer in the concept of God: hey God. Thank you for Girl Scout Cookie season! I'd also like to eat some brownies, too. Am I horrible?

What's different here than in college town: (funny shit from Georgia) they got snow

What's different here than dumbass Arizona: (funny shit from Arizona) they never get snow

(new bullet point) What is so cool about Oregon? Weed was approved; it will be legal here by July, 2015...Oregon Ducks were the #2 college football team (again) in 2014...Oregon has diseases! (from the paper 2-5-15) "Infection possible in third student. She lives in the same on-campus dorm as one diagnosed with meningococcemia (potentially fatal blood infection)..."...Rachel Maddow talks about us! http://www.msnbc.com/rachel-maddow/watch/most-interesting-news-in-the-us-today--oregon-394897475924 ...2-6-15; some kind of 'milky rain' fell all over Oregon and Washington today. Experts are stumped...A 62-year-old man (Patrick Buono) didn't violate Oregon law when he used his cellphone to take photos up a 13-year-old girl's skirt at Target, a Washington County judge ruled...Katy Perry's Superbowl Lion (30 feet tall) was made in Oregon...Oregon is 1% of the U. S. population...Portland makes turbo toilets (or some shit like that): https://www.minds.com/blog/view/415942000412463104/portland-installs-turbines-in-their-city-water-pipes-powers-city-by-flushing-toilets ...

How Does Your Garden Grow? (Tales from our community garden plot): Not yet. Soon, though... Well, we did go there on Saturday 2-28-15 to see all of our garlic growing (2 kinds!)...

Life with Static Girl: She is amazing!..Valentine's Day; we went and washed her car! Fun...

My FCP has this for me: Also amazing, and very forgiving, too!

Comments From The Peanut Gallery: Measles is making a comeback!..My Facebook post: "Bill Cosby raped 35+ women (the count so far) in his earlier days, and now Bruce Jenner is going to be a girl (Maybe she can date Bill Cosby!)"...InStyle magazine covergirl Kerry Washington was not black enough to keep black people from complaining that she looked too White. I couldn't make this shit up...Staples bought Office Max; Radio Shack filed Chapter 11...Since 1980 a college education has increased in price 945%...

A thought to take with you: "How few there are who have the courage enough to own their faults, or resolution enough to mend them."--Benjamin Franklin

"May all your problems be first world."--W. C. Davis (Me)

Oregon Bumper Stickers: There are now websites full of bumper sticker logic.

Band names: Clerical Error, Self-Inflicted Injuries, Four-Hour-Erection, Attilla and the Huns, Dr. Recommended Masturbation (life just got interesting), Freezer Burn,






SIDEBAR 202

April 2015


(...last month we were...)


Reading: (Take 5 minutes and) Go read this: http://www.silverbearcafe.com/private/03.15/ieverything.html
(The "iEverything" and the Redistributional Imperative--Robert Reich)

Watching: (3-5-15) It was just a matter of time before Lance Henrickson showed up on The Blacklist (The Major), 3 weeks in a row. I watch too much tv, but The Blacklist is good...

Class Projects: old Dr. Who's, Castle, Outragous Acts Of Science, Oregon Field Guide,

movies together: no.

Shit I watch alone: Craig Ferguson is gone from the Late Late Show, Jon Stewart is leaving The Daily Show (Tina Fey? Daniel Tosh?)...

Comedians: Trevor Moore's "High In Church",

Crappy cable movies: "This Is 40",

Play it Again's: many do-overs, so?

Watching and Hearing: (It's just more Youtubing...) Do you even know how much extra Nine Inch Nails is out there? I've already heard about 5 hours of bonus stuff--like the original demo of "Down In It". Yay internet!..

Now with faster than dial-up internet; Youtubing: after 3-6-15, lots of The Dreaming and Die So Fluid...

Hearing: Die So Fluid "The Opposites Of Light", The Dreaming "Rise Again" (both purchased on 3-6-15 at their show in Eugene),

New on the radio; I don't listen to the radio right now.

Musical Purchases this month from the Tom Tucker discount wall at Skip's Records And CDWorld; my future place of employment, and permanent Barbie Dream Home: nope.

Out and About: The Genesis channel at BBQ King, Van Halen + Journey at Play It Again Sports,

Singing: Ack! I had Sheryl Crow's "Soak Up The Sun" stuck in my head, so I played NIN "Everyday Is Exactly The Same" 7 or 8 times to exorcise it (I do NOT mind humming any NIN music, ever)..."46 + 2"--Tool, "Dream On"--Depeche Mode, "Band On The Run"--Wings,

What I want today: I want to eliminate all but about 500K people on the planet. Like the Illuminatti? No. Call me "Eliminatti".

New stuff this month or so: 2 months ago, I guess--5 local Wendy's shut down. The one near us is still closed, and nobody has even changed the letters on the sign into something dirty (I would; but I'm like, 50)...(Hockey player) Jaromr Jagr is 43 now (drafted in '90), and a new member of the Florida Panthers. In a game during the first week of March, a 19 yr. old Florida Panther scored a goal, and Jaromir did, too (24 years difference)...My new Buick turned 157K miles on 3-12-15...March Madness; I'm not usually interested, but this year Georgia State (Panthers), UGA, and Oregon were all 3 in, and all won a game!..3-28-15; I found out today that Donny (friend from Georgia) passed away from a heart attack. This sucks...

This Month of bargain-shopping (Dollar Tree, Cash King, Big Lots, etc.): Dental floss, baggies, and sticky tape. I am cheap!

Occupational Hazards: You need a job to have occupational hazards, right? I have started helping out Shannon, the 88 yr. old guy who plays poker with me on Sundays. He needs a body to sit with him, cook breakfast, and hang out for 4 hours on Monday, Wednesday and/or Friday mornings; 9-1 pm. It's not bad. He was 17, fighting in WW2, and he is quite aware of military secrets, alien technology, etc...

Personal shit for my own memory banks this month: Tuesday, 3-10-15 I (actually left the house, and) went to The Bijou theater to see "Still Alice" ("Birdman" wasn't there). Not a bad movie...3-17-15; I won the 2-week raffle at Emerald City Medicinal; a free quarter of super-good weed!..Bought a bike tire pump on 3-12-15; $13 at Big 5...3-21-15, I went and saw "The Wrecking Crew" movie at The Bijou...3-24-15; 5:40 pm--I'm at Blairally playing a 2-player game of Dr. Who; 1.600 billion, and 1.632 billion. I'm eating pot chocolate and vaping while I play; have already drunk some pot strawberry lemonade, and smoked some pineapple weed. How is YOUR day going? I would later put a billion on Dracula pinball (score #3)...

Pinball and Golden Tee stuff: 3-1-15; played a game of 2015 Golden Tee; -10 (11 birdies, 2 eagles)...3-4-15; I won Pinball Knights! $30 for me!..3-8-15, Golden Tee w/Shane; -12...3-11-15 I won Fourthmeal at Pinball Knights...3-18-15 I tied for last at Pinball Knights (boo, but I was depressed about Shannon, who had fallen out of bed the day before)...3-25-15 I came in 3rd at Pinball Knights. Then after midnight I put up the NEW Grand Champion on Dracula (1.402 billion), and NEW loop record of 33. Sweet.

Poker stuff: 3-1-15; I made the podium again ($50)...3-8-15; podium again; ($35)...3-15; I got nuthin'!...3-22-15; 6 people, made the podium again...3-29-15; I won that bitch! ($70)

Grammar: I have given up on correcting most people.

New foods this month: I've been doing the apple cider vineager almost daily; it's like a cleanse...Berry Pomegranate Chia Clif bars (new favorite); YUM!..

This month of Blues Jamming: 3-6-15 Live Show: (Eugene's) Pistol-Whipped Prophets, Die So Fluid, and The Dreaming at The Black Forest in Eugene. Wow...3-12-15; I went back to Blues Jam! It was VERY quiet there (They fucking miss me!). Zane, Ralph, John Powell, and 4 drummers (Jimmy D., Lenny P., Brian D., and Axel F.). Guitarist Roger, and harmonica Tim showed up after set 1...Music I missed: on Wednesday 3-25-15 I missed Marilyn Manson in Portland, also missed Bad Religion at the McDonald Theater in Eugene (x-boyfriends opened), and also missed Brian Chevalier at The Granary in Eugene--all because I had to run Pinball Knights. More examples of how pinball costs me other things in life!..

My trials and trib.s as a critical believer in the concept of God: No. And God doesn't need you, by the way. So just keep walking...

What's different here than in college town: "The Devil Went Down To Oregon" is the name of a new Ninkasi beer here in Eugene. You're welcome...

What's different here than dumbass Arizona: It would be better to link to Colorado; why? Well; Colorado was the first state to regulate marijuana. The Colorado Avalanche are my favorite hockey team (and Nathan MacKinnon is my favorite player), Static Parents live just north of Denver, and Lyons Pinball is 20 miles away from Static Parents...With Paul gone, I have ZERO links back to Arizona. PS: the Denver college hockey team just missed the Frozen Four, losing to Providence in a really good college hockey game!

What is so cool about Oregon? In Oregon, after a small outdoor smoking session, all participants stop and get the lighters back to their original owners. In other states, people just steal your lighters...Looking to the west on 3-3-15, there is a huge light in the sky way out, probably over the ocean (60 miles away), and it's fluttering, blinking, and throwing off traces of different colors. It was out there on Friday night, too. Tonight there were a couple of other cars watching it with me. So; sure, I'm a crazy conspiracy/alien nutjob. But I am not alone in it...Oregon has the highest number of unvaccinated kindergarten children (7%)...Oregon Geologist Hopes To Inspire Young Scientists With Geology Lego Set "Albany-based research geologist Circe Verba created a 213-piece 'Research Geology' set that's currently vying for support on Lego Ideas." www.opb.org|By Lizzy Duffy...3-19-18; newspaper today, Oregon now has 6 cases of that meningococcemia (potentially fatal blood infection), as some off-campus guy has it now. So; it's also spreading off campus now? Great...

How Does Your Garden Grow? (Tales from our community garden plot): Our garlic is growing! I like it!..3-7-15; Hyacinth, too...

Life with Static Girl: She is a very tolerant companion. And on 3-5-15 she went back to her Dr. and got shot up full of 'no baby' juice. I like her!..Do you remember how Niles was obsessed with Daphne on Frasier? He would just look at her, and then start mumbling romantic shit? Yea. That's me--gazing at Static Girl; even now, 17 years later...She inspires my inner serial killer. Lucky me...Music I cannot play when she is home: in Phoenix, around 2002, I played the (GT2) Millenium mix of "Now Is The Time" by Crystal Method so much that she can't stand it anymore. In Eugene, 2011/2012, I played "Panic Switch" by the Silversun Pickups so much that she can't stand it anymore, either. These are the first 2 songs I punch up on Youtube when I am home alone on the computer!..

My FCP has this for me: We trade e-mails--cool!

Comments From The Peanut Gallery: Don't be gay in Indiana; it's illegal!..AAA determined that 60% of teens who wreck in cars were being distracted by something in their control (cell phones)...Heinz is buying Kraft...

A thought to take with you: "Every war when it comes, or before it comes, is represented not as a war but as an act of self-defense against a homicidal maniac."--George Orwell

"Go straddle a narwhale you chlorinated gene pool"--an ex-Dominos Pizza employee to a customer

“If you can’t sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It’s the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep.”--Dale Carnegie

Oregon Bumper Stickers: I hardly pay attention now.

Band names: "Freak Accident" and "Fell On Brick Stairs" (Red), (real bands) "Hooker Vomit" and "The ButtFrenchers", "The Invisible Letters" (a Bill Hicks fan), "Infected Buddhists"--Pat Robertson, "Pyramid Scheme Berries"--It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia,





SIDEBAR 203

May 2015


(...last month we were...)


Reading: I need to read something other than the crap I already wrote.

Watching: My newest show is "Big Time In Hollywood, Florida". It's funny...Yeah, yeah, and I WOULD watch these new Lizzie Borden Chronicles, if whatever dumb bitch network (um, Lifetime?) would put it on Sunday nights--where it is advertised on OTHER networks as being ON Sunday nights! Christina Ricci is cool...4-30-15; I checked out the new "Odd Couple", which is not horrible...

Class Projects: Oregon Art Beats, Oregon Field Guides, Ourageous Acts Of Science, Castle, The Big Picture with Kal Penn,

movies together: No.

Shit I watch alone: I watch it ALL alone...Playoff hockey! Go Tampa Bay, and go Chicago!..Hangar 1 UFO Files, Fridays on History...

Comedians: Robert Kelly was funny...

Crappy cable movies: ehhh.

Play it Again's: Thank You For Smoking,

Watching and Hearing: Youtube stuff: okay, when Static Girl is NOT here, the first 2 songs I punch up are the 2 that I have made her 'lifetime sick' of; the GT2 millenium mix of "Now Is The Time"--Crystal Method, and "Panic Switch"--Silversun Pickups. Got it? She is somehow NOT sick of the almost 9-minute extended version of "Fascination Street"--The Cure. Those are my first 3 songs to pull up. Then I also add "My Favourite Game"--The Cardigans, "As Heaven Is Wide"--Garbage, "46 + 2"--Tool, and "Love Spreads"--Stone Roses. Of these 7 songs, 3 of them are direct links to Gran Turismo, or GT2

Now with faster than dial-up internet; Youtubing:

Hearing: Death Metal Chad R. gave me a Were Jaguar CD (his band) at 4-15-15 Pinball Knights. I like tracks 2 and 13 the best.

New on the radio; fuck radio. Sorry; but nobody cares. Neither of us even HAS a radio in our respective vehicles.

Musical Purchases this month from the Tom Tucker discount wall at Skip's Records And CDWorld; my future place of employment, and permanent Barbie Dream Home: nothing

Out and About: Smashing Pumpkins at Mezza Luna Pizza, and from out of nowhere (on some internet pop station) there was "Grey Cell Green"--Ned's Atomic Dustbin at Five Guys (wow).

Singing: "Come Monday"--Jimmy Buffet, "7 Nation Army"--White Stripes, "Panic Switch"--Silversun Pickups, "Right Where It Belongs"--NIN,

What I want today: AXS tv channel is supposed to be 340 on Direct TV, but does not exist (we would need an HD DVR to get it). I missed a NIN interview/show with Trent Reznor...I'd like the permanent pain in my right shoulder to take a few years off; I can handle the elbow pain. Maybe...The lower back pain; you would THINK that I would be used to it by now, but no...

New stuff this month or so: 4-9-15 is 4 months without a cigarette (I could just fall down 2 or 3 steps in excitment), and the weird family next-door neighbors moved out over a 24 hour period. Okay. Also; on 4-9, during my exercise walk, I broke one of my hand-exercisers. Huh?...4-14-15; weird traffic day; not only did I see a head-on collision right in front of me, but later while (birthday week) Dylan T. and I were at Level Up playing pinball, a freak tornado landed at LCC in Eugene and flipped a couple of cars (where his daughter was attending class) in the parking lot...4-16 is/was my Dad's 71st birthday...4-29-15; after rioting in Baltimore (For some dead black person who did not comply with police--imagine that!), they played a baseball game with NO fans in the stands. Why?..

This Month of bargain-shopping (Dollar Tree, Cash King, Big Lots, etc.): I need antacids! Bought 3 bottles of them.

Occupational Hazards: HA! Well, I do sometimes help out poker player Shannon at his house. It's like "caregiving", but not as complicated.

Personal shit for my own memory banks this month: 4-3-15; I coughed up enough lung stuff to clog a garbage disposal. Quitting smoking is finally taking hold!..4-9-15; the tinge pain in the right shoulder and elbow won't let up. And I have stumbled, 2wice. Started re-doing the nerve-helping rubber band exercises; Static Girl's good idea. The Dark Turtle gave me some more of his hemp lotion for my arthritis pain. It helps, but is not ideal. So I use hemp lotion, pain pills, and eat chocolate pot candy while I still bitch about being in constant pain. Oh! And the new lower left tooth chip is throbbing just beautifully; it chipped, and then the hole got bigger! Also; I still have not seen a neurologist; I'm on Peacehealth's Blacklist, apparently, and they have neurology monopolized in Eugene...4-14-15; so everybody is saying how good this new scary movie "It Follows" is. Yeah. That was a huge waste of $7 for me. Thanks...4-15-15, very productive day; workout, clean, cook, shop, nap, and up right before the alarm. Then after winning Pinball Knights (woo), I heard a car race up Oakpatch and crash at 1 am. It sounded really bad...4-18-15 Saturday was Record Store Day. The only thing I left the house for was to exercise-walk. Then I worked out to Penguins/Rangers playoff hockey on tv; woo. Do I need new sections for arthritis and dental problems? Possibly...New vitamins! I now own some "50+" (age 50 and over) vitamins from Wal-Mart!..4-27-15; talking to, and trying to get off the Peacehealth blacklist...

Pinball and Golden Tee stuff: 4-1-15 Pinball Knights; 13 people, I tied for 5th...4-8-15 Pinball Knights; 11 people, and I won it!..4-15-15 Pinball Knights; 16 people, and I won it!..4-22-15 Pinball Knights; 12 people, and I tied for 7th...4-29-15 Pinball Knights; 8 people, and I won it! (I won 3 in April 2015?)

Poker stuff: 4-5-15 poker; 6 people, I came in 5th...4-12-15, 7 people, and I came in 6th...4-18-15; I won another Round 3 of Zynga Poker on Facebook...4-19-15, 7 people, I came in 4th...4-26-15; 10 poker people, 2 tables; I made the podium...

Grammar: I like seeing double errors in sentences written by college graduates; it makes me giggle. (Excuse me, Mr. Master's Degree, but your compound sentence has a complex set of errors.)

New foods this month: Had a 1/2 lb. El Diablo burger at Carl's Jr, not bad (but that crappy bacon, ugh)...It's going to be tough to top the Five Guys regular double bacon cheeseburger, though...Then Ryker said I had to try Little Big Burger, and that was good, too (4-9-15)...Still also love my Texas Double Whoppers...It was MY idea to crush mixed nuts, mix them with butter, and add it to a can of green beans (we are circulating our old cans of food). 'Butter Nut Green Beans' are delicious! Brussels Sprouts are next! Yes; and the brusels sprouts with olive oil and mixed nut powder were excellent, too...Earlier this month I ate a whole sleeve of Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookies in about 10 minutes. The next day, I could SEE them in my stomach! I don't make good food decisions. I also don't make good drink decisions. In fact; if I am given options, then I will find a way to make a bad choice...Who walks by a 2 lb. deli fudge brownie and thinks 'Oh yeah, that's me.'?..I tried a couple of these morning Crunchwrap thingies from Taco Bell, then had heartburn for 8 hours...Crushed nuts melted into butter with garlic and onion bits over broccoli crowns was really good (peanut butter drizzled over broccoli)...

This month of Blues Jamming: 4-9-15 Blues Jam at the Overtime! I got there at 9:25pm and saw: Z-Bass, Ralph Novak and Natty Bump on guitars, John Powell on keys, + Jimmy Dupree drumming. 2 was Russ W. bass, Ricky Johnson and Ralph Novak guitars, J. P., Jimmy D drums. 3 was Z-Bass, Ricky and Ralph, J. P., Bart on harmonica, Brian drums. 4 (at 12:15) was Z-Bass, Ricky and Ralph, J. P., Bart on harp, and Jimmy D drums...Then I went crazy, and took Bart with me!..4-16-15 My Dad's birthday Blues Jam! I walked down there at 9:15, and it was great! Set 1 was Z-Bass, Chad J. and Ralph N. "Slim" on guitars, John Powell on keys, Michael Johnson on harmonica, Jimmy D on drums. 2 was Z-Bass, Ricky Johnson and Slim on guitars, Brian drums. 3 was Z-Bass, Max L. and (newbie) Dylan S. on guitars, JP snuck in there, and Jimmy D drums. 4 was Z-Bass, Max L. and Slim on guitars, JP, and Jimmy D drums...

My trials and trib.s as a critical believer in the concept of God: God doesn't need me, or you. So why are 5000 different 'religions' clamoring so hard to get new converts and network marketers?..Where does the Big Picture end?

What's different here than in college town: I wonder what Athens is up to right now.

What's different here than dumbass Arizona: I don't think much about AZ.

What is so "cool" about Oregon? Everything. For 9 months out of the year, our weather is like this: lows between 35 and 45, highs between 60 and 70. Can your state do this? I'm guessing "not"...The U of O was ranked the 7th most pot-friendly skool (7th?).

How Does Your Garden Grow? (Tales from our community garden plot): 4-4-15; we went to the garden to plant peas and cauliflower; cool. The garlic is beautiful...4-11-15, back to the garden for a short trip...4-18-15; I hurt so bad that I couldn't get out of bed to go look at the garden...But I did a little digging in the garden during the next week, so when we went back on 4-25-15, girlfriend was WAY impressed with what I had done. We planted lemon cucumbers, zuchini, and sun gold tomatos!..4-20-15ish; We have a "plot-mate" couple; they are killdeer birds (http://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Killdeer/id) with a small nest of 4 eggs. They are loud and crazy--so I obviously like them! The eggs will need 28 days to hatch.

Life with Static Girl: 4-5-15; she got my sickness, and it's all my fault...

My FCP has this for me: she's still out there.

Comments From The Peanut Gallery: American Apparel is cutting half its workforce...Walgreens is closing 200 stores...McDonald's is closing 900 stores?..Taco Bell serves dog and cat meat? Yum!..Levi Strauss is cutting 150 Eugene jobs; boo.

A thought to take with you: just stop thinking altogether

Oregon Bumper Stickers: Downtown pick-up line: "I like stalking you. You go to good shows."

Band names: Meth Bible Camp, Too Pretty For The Pit, Christian Genocide, Aborted Fetus Cheese!, Burger Chain Bacon,





SIDEBAR 204

June 2015


(...last month we were...)


Reading: Ha! I read the newspaper everyday.

Watching: I watch entirely too much tv.

Class Projects: Static Girl made it about 35 minutes into an episode of "Lizzie Borden Chronicles" before totally losing interest; oh well...She did watch an entire episode of "How To Be A Grown Up" with me.

movies together: never again, I don't think. She is too busy to sit still for 90 minutes.

Shit I watch alone: I enjoy "Schitt's Creek" Wednesday nights on POP tv channel (which is different from the POP pinball outreach project), but my favorite show on television right now is "Big Time In Hollywood Florida" Wednesday nights on Comedy Central. Hump Day has good tv. Oh yes; "How To Be A Grown Up" on TRU tv is excellent.

Comedians: Chris Titus "Angry Pursuit of Happiness", Sebastian Maniscola "Aren't You Embarrassed?", Nate Bargatze "Full Time Magic', Nick Swardson "Taste It". From How to be a grown up, I want to learn more about Erin Foley, who looks like me and Static Girl combined.

Crappy cable movies: Heatstroke (2007), Atari - Game Over, The Invasion (2007?),

Play it Again's: And now a message from the movie industry; Mouth-breathers hey look--we are re-making Mad Max, The Craft, Jurassic Park, Poltergeist, and Point Break. X-Files is coming back, too. We know you don't expect much from us. I mean, come on! We're the people who re-made The Amityville Horror 10 years ago. A re-make of a fake movie, based on a fake book; God bless (us) the movie industry!

Watching and Hearing: saw Tom Waits on (the last week of) Letterman...There are at least 3 different consumer commercials on tv with music by the Who in them (Eminence Front, Who Are You, and Squeeze Box)...A 30 second car commercial where the only feature of the car shown (Chevy) is that the car is a rolling wifi hotspot (ooooo), so your little mutant children don't get bored...5-29-15; I just saw a Batman movie commercial on tv that had NIN music in the background, and I like that.

Now with faster than dial-up internet; Youtubing: same shit, different ways

Hearing: Death Metal's (pinball Chad's) band "Were Jaguar" is impressive!

New on the radio; Muse has a new CD coming! The singles "Psycho" and "Dead Inside" are both really good!..

Musical Purchases this month from the Tom Tucker discount wall at Skip's Records And CDWorld; my future place of employment, and permanent Barbie Dream Home:

Out and About: 5-21-15; The David Bowie channel at Little Big Burger (nice)...At Fred Meyer I heard "Madness" by Muse, followed by "Dream Weaver" by Gary Wright (they should neither be playing music that old, NOR music that new). Just sayin'.

Singing: "As Heaven Is Wide"--Garbage, "Greyhound pt. 1" (Moby mix)--Jon Spencer Blues Explosion (Again; how do you sing an instrumental?), “Too Close”--Alex Claire,

What I want today: Ava Fiore "Cleats and Cleavage",

New stuff this month or so: 5-4-15; we went back to Summer sheets on the bed--no more flannels for now! I also bought my new awesome toilet brush. Might have to get another one for the shower! (No; just a toilet brush)...5-10-15; Mother's Day was the first day I saw the Twilight beer (Summer brew) at Fred Meyer. So I bought a 12 of it (and an orange, and drank 4). Yum!..Early in the baseball season that I don't really care about, but; 10 of the Houston Astros first 25 wins were "Come From Behind Victories". Go Houston!..5-24-15 I think was the Indy 500. I watched it at Shannon's house while I recorded it at home. Decent race; JPM won it...

This Month of bargain-shopping (Dollar Tree, Cash King, Big Lots, etc.): not much

Occupational Hazards: Well, I am getting paid (a tiny bit) to run Pinball Knights, and paid even less for my Sunday poker game. So there's that. I like helping out Shannon when I can, also...

Personal shit for my own memory banks this month: 5-5-15; mailed my appeal letter to Peacehealth!..(My Mother's day Facebook post:) "My Mom and I were on the phone at midnight Saturday, as it became Mother's Day on the east coast. And we were still on the phone (and laughing) 3 hours later, when it became midnight/Mother's Day on the west coast, too. I'm pretty sure that gives us the FIRST Mother's Day phone call this year! (and at 4.5 hours, maybe the longest) Happy Mother's Day everybody; and, CALL YOUR MOTHER!"...On Friday 5-29-15, I went out and bought the parts to create a low-cost air-conditioner; cooler, fan, dryer vents. Put some frozen water bottles in it, and BOOM, air-conditioning! Maybe I’ll take a picture...The day after the POP tournament (Sunday), I discovered a large bite mark on my left side. Possibly a human bite mark. Okay. No other information is available at this time.

Pinball and Golden Tee stuff: 5-1-15 (Friday); Tom's Birthday/MayDay Pinball tournament at Blairally; 17 people, and I came in 3rd. Woo...5-6-15 2 Turtles Birthday Pinball Knights; 16 people, and I won it all!..During the finals of 5-6-15, I scored over 2 billion on Dracula, but somehow the score was not recorded (Kevin C. was playing player 2, and he can't or won't explain what happened, so I'm done with him.). The current actual Dracula high score is still my 1.4 billion (and now Dracula is gone from the arcade)...5-13-15 Pinball Knights; 11 people, and I won it (At one point I had zero dollars; later I had $93!)...5-20-15 Pinbal Knights; 13 people, I came in 5th (I've still won 5 of the last 7 though)...5-27-15 Pinball Knights, with the TRON Legacy pinball machine from POP! Only 9 people, but I won it! (I've won 6 of the last 8!)...

Poker stuff: 5-3-15; 9 people, and I bubbled out in 3rd place (no money)...5-10-15 Mary's (Shane's Mom) Mother's Day Poker; I came in 2nd ($60)...5-17-15 Poker! I came in 2nd ($90)...5-24-15 Poker! 5 people, and I came in 4th...5-31-15 Poker! 5 people, and I came in 3rd (no money), but Shannon won it, so that's cool.

Grammar: “Man admits two double-murder”--I couldn’t make this shit up...

New foods this month: early May; I have been making great vegan burritos: frozen crumbles, peas and corn in a bowl, microwaved for 3 minutes. Then add some cold canned tomatos, and slivered organic jalapenos, and those are good burritos!..

This month of Blues Jamming: I didn't even go see the Jon Spencer Blues Explosion when they were here on a Monday in May...

My trials and trib.s as a critical believer in the concept of God: Are there really adults in the world who actually believe that 2 penguins walked from Antarctica to the Middle East to get on an arc built by a 500 yr. old man? I'm just asking, okay? It's not like I read some crap like that in a book and believed it myslef. No. For I would STILL be laughing!..I've got another one for God's children; Religion is a multi-billion industry and those benefitting financially from it will do everything in their power to keep the con going...

What's different here than in college town: I haven't lived (or been there) there in over 15 years. I wouldn't even KNOW what is different now.

What's different here than dumbass Arizona: Phoenix was a fun little 5-year jaunt. It's been over for 10 years. Move on.

What is so cool about Oregon? Guys from Europe come here to molest 10 yr. old girls (huh?)...An Oregon 'Shop teacher' (woodshop) let students (who wanted to) burn "I Love Mom" onto their arms for Mother's Day (the temporary tattoo would last 3 or 4 days). But the teacher is in serious trouble for doing that now. Why? I don't know. Did I mention that the kids 'wanted to'?..Um, the University of Oregon is spending $20 million to improve--something. Hang on; I'll go find the dumbass thing: it's a $20 million 'public image campaign', as reported by the Register Guard. Sure--that makes sense...Portland was voted the 5th best city in the U. S. for parks...U of O factoids (and sources): Oregon has the #1 overall athletic department revenue (NCAA), Oregon is the #4 Top Cannabis College (High Times magazine), Oregon is the #19 top party school (Princeton Review), and Oregon is the 106th best national university (US News and World Report)...

How Does Your Garden Grow? (Tales from our community garden plot): 5-2-15; to the garden! My 3 cucumber plants are dead! However; the 2 tomatos are okay, and the zuchini might live. We will plant more next weekend. The Killdeer couple are still guarding their nest, and good for them...5-9-15 Saturday; trip to Saturday Market and the garden. New cucumbers, squash, and sweet potatos planted! The Killdeer couple are down to just 2 eggs, but they're still guarding them!..5-16-15; to the garden to water and weed...Maybe around 5-17-15 was when the Killdeer nest was destroyed. Oh well--that's life!..

Life with Static Girl: Sunday 5-3-15, she slept in later than she ever has in Oregon. She stayed in bed until...wait for it...7:15 am. Wow. Just; wow...

My FCP has this for me: not much; we have radio silence going on right now. We'll catch up.

Comments From The Peanut Gallery: McDonald's to close 700 stores in 2015 (sure they will)...Members of Congress, who average $184,000 per year--want a raise! Good luck with that!..News shit. Yeah; so 6 Baltimore police officers are indicted in the death of Freddie Gray. You may have heard about this, and all the hoopla about race, and 'Black lives matter', and whatever else. Fine. 3 of the 6 officers indicted were Black; did you know this? NOW I find this tragedy HILARIOUS. Black people are just as much to blame for Freddies death as White people (and maybe more), but you sure as fuck don't hear THAT on the news. Thank you.

A thought to take with you: "Life ain't all burritos and strippers."--Facebook quote

"We are buried under the weight of information, which is being confused with knowledge; quantity is being confused with abundance, and wealth with happiness. We are monkeys with money and guns."--Tom Waits

"The cost of sanity in this society, is a certain level of alienation."--Terence McKenna

Oregon Bumper Stickers: didn't write any down last month

Band names: "Robotic Graffiti", (real Oregon band) "Door Number Three", "Booze For Dinner"--Amy F.,


HR>

SIDEBAR 205

July 2015


(...last month we were...)


Reading: Newspaper, everyday.

Watching: HBO preview until 7-25-15.

Class Projects: "CSI Cyber" was okay (maybe even a bit better), 2wice now, yes--we like it!..

movies together: no time

Shit I watch alone: "The Whispers" (Monday) definitely has potential...I got sick on 6-2-15; stayed up all night watching Tesla videos. Next day I watched the 'Forks Over Knives' documentary. The next night I watched hours of UFO videos. That's it--we're all screwed; THEY control our food, our medicine, our energy, and our contact with aliens. We have ZERO chance now. Bottoms up!..A Football Life--Barry Sanders, and Walter Payton...Thought Crimes: The Case Of The Cannibal Cop...AMC's "Halt And Catch Fire" is back..

Comedians: a few. So?

Crappy cable movies: Not exactly a crappy cable movie, but I'd been wanting to see "Forks Over Knives" for years. Static Girl actually already owned the documentary ('Baby, how long have you had this?' 'I don't know.'), and I watched it (while reeling in pain over my Taco Bell food poisoning on 6-4-15). Good movie, and it explained a couple of things I was "gray" on..."Movie 43" was okay...HBO preview! I checked out "Gone Girl", and "Get On Up" was good. Is there a Behind The Music with James Brown?..I recorded "Argo", and then deleted it. Oh well...

Play it Again's: More from the loving movie business: amidst all of the rehashes we mentioned last month, I forgot the 2015 Jurassic Park do-over. Oh; and the latest installment of the Terminater franchise. And, yes; it's now been almost 15 years since the last versions of 'Rollerball' or 'Planet of the Apes' (so we're due). Oops. Sorry. It looks like there was another 'Planet of the Apes' movie project that crashed in 2014. I'm a genius. Never mind...Speaking of play it agains, and Jurassic Park, on 6-6-15 4 different cable channels ran the 1993 Jurassic Park at almost the same time. Tv is not even trying anymore...

Watching and Hearing: Ah You Tube; how did I live before ye?..Trent Reznor is pushing a new $10 monthly music service, and I am working on a response...

Now with faster than dial-up internet; Youtubing: Dude! The first 4 songs I pull up are almost always the exact same--because I am so boring: "Now Is The Time"--Crystal Method, "As Heaven Is Wide"--Garbage, "My Favourite Game"--The Cardigans (wow, 3 Gran Turismo songs), and "Panic Switch"--Silversun Pickups.

Hearing: 11 CD's on my desk. The top one is NIN "Broken", and the bottom one is Limp Bizket's "Significant Other"

New on the radio; YES! BOTH "New on the radio" and "What I Want Today" it is...wait for it...Smokin' 94.1 Pot Talk and Rock Radio in Denver! Where the fuck has this been for my entire life? Oh; they just started June 1st. And they DON'T have anybody on the air from 12 midnight to 6 am right now. Does anybody know of a semi-intelligent pothead who would like to work overnights in rock radio? Man; but I don't really want to move to Denver...

Musical Purchases this month from the Tom Tucker discount wall at Skip's Records And CDWorld; my future place of employment, and permanent Barbie Dream Home:
Sidewalk Sale 6-26-15. How did I celebrate? By staying home in the dark...

Out and About: Neither out nor about; but on my physical therapy hold music was Led Zeppelin's "Houses Of The Holy", a relatively obscure track from Physical Graffiti. Wow...

Singing: "Strawberry Letter 23"--The Brothers Johnson , "In And Out"--Van Halen, "Mayonaise"--Smashing Pumpkins, "Various Methods of Escape"--NIN, "Mr. Blue Sky"--ELO, "Boogie With Stu"--Led Zeppelin, "It's Going To Take Some Time"--Dishwalla's version of The Carpenter's song, "Fix Me Now"--Garbage,

What I want today: Um, pot radio?

New stuff this month or so: The first week of June is "Beer Week in Eugene"; I knew that...June 18th to 28th is Oregon Cider Week. 10 days a week, baby!..18 miles to the gallon in the new Buick. Wait; I haven't named my new Buick yet?..Speaking of the new Buick, driving Shannon home (6-28-15) after his 2nd poker win in 2 weeks, we turned on my Buick's air conditioner for THE VERY FIRST TIME! Not only do I have air-conditioning, but I have really good air-conditioning. Nice! So; on Monday, I drove my Buick through a drive-thru car wash--with the air-conditioner running at full blast. Oh fuck yes I did! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Look for more brushes with maturity coming soon.

This Month of bargain-shopping (Dollar Tree, Cash King, Big Lots, etc.): Did I go? Why or why not?

Occupational Hazards: I'd like to work at the Sweet Tree Farms dispensary. Yes I would. They like me...I will be doing more part-time "personal assisting" with Shannon in July. That's good, right? He says that I'm the only person who knows how to put his shoes on.

Personal shit for my own memory banks this month: Food poisoning? I went to Taco Bell on 6-2-15 Tuesday night. 4 hours later I was cough/puking uncontrollably, and shivering. Definitely not a regular 'sick'. And then it turned into a semi-regular 'sick'. Life is so rad. Oh; and I am DONE with Taco Bell. Fuck it; I may go totally vegan now (no)...It would be fun to wake up at 10 pm, and then party hard until 10 am. If ANYBODY could pull that off...6-16-15 I got my new $7 purple topper for my vape pen...6-17-15 (WE) finally saw a neurologist (Dr. Slater--again, I couldn't make this stuff up); he thinks I will be fine, just absolutely fine, and not to worry about it. Sure. And at this quack's office my fully dressed w/shoes weight was 211 (And we'll take that!)...6-17-15 (TH) I flossed out another chunk of my broken tooth, and my lower jaw is starting to ache (Oh, good!)...6-19-15 I flossed out the biggest chunk yet of my dying tooth. This dark matter is huge--I may make a big black trophy out of it; ooo I could give it away as a pinball tournament prize...6-20-15 (SA) I will get another MRI late in the afternoon. Stay tuned...It was great; only took like 20 minutes. At 7 pm I'm eating my first Fudge Bomb. 655 mg. of THC! "This product was produced in a facility with nuts." (I like good medibles)...I've been flossing out chunks of fillings and teeth for years; yes. New fun; a couple of times in June I have actually "brushed" out some big mouth chew parts--just like a regular person would! See? I'm not so weird after all. Want more? Okay; the dying lower left tooth is the main one "chunking out", and the jaw right underneath that tooth is staring to throb, hard and constant now! My Dental Honeymoon is on! More? Okay; but just one more: my lower lip is now scratching where my jagged left tooth pokes its little points out. Blood and swelling! You simply MUST experience this for yourself!..I like getting a big head rush right after a coughing fit now. It's a bonus to getting older...Late June; my redneck air-conditioner works just fine...And I bought a Brett Favre Copper Fit back brace. Yay me!..

Pinball and Golden Tee stuff: 6-2-15 Tuesday pinball with the regulars at Blairally; my final highest score on TRON pinball was 42 million (Will had 90 million). Then Andy + I earned the highest score on Countdown after our first ball (460K); new initials for that (561K) are DEW (his are DRI, mine are NEW). He has beaten that score since, but DEW is still up there...6-3-15 Pinball Knights I missed because I was (Taco Bell) sick and depressed...6-10-15 Pinball Knights; 11 people, and I came in 2nd to Laazarus...6-17-15 Pinball Knights; 11 people, new prizes; like the 'I Feel Waffle' Award! I came in 2nd to Andy...6-24-15 Pinball Knights; 11 people, and I won it!..

Poker stuff: Poker 6-7-15; 6 people, I low-split with chip-leader John ($80)...Poker 6-14-15; 5 people, I beat Rob and won $80...Poker 6-21-15; 3 people, and I got smoked (Shannon beat the crap out of me.)...Poker 6-28-15; 4 people, and Shannon won it all again! Good for him! Shannon rules!..

Grammar: Oh please. I stumbled across some pictures of misspelled tattoos. Ha!

New foods this month: We're going to get back to doing smoothies 5 days per week. And Clif bars. It's not new.

This month of Blues Jamming: I went once. When was that? 6-25-15 Blues jam. I missed the first set. Set 2 was Russ W. on bass, John Powell on keys and singing, Mark the Harp helped, Bill S. and R. J. Herb on guitars. Set 3 was Z-Bass, R. J. Herb + Ralph Novak guitars, Jimmy D drums. Sage sang some. Set 4 was Z-Bass, Bill S. and Ralph Novak guitars, Jimmy D drums...

My trials and trib.s as a critical believer in the concept of God: Oregon bumper sticker "Who Would Jesus Bribe?" (Don't we have a bumper sticker section?)...

What's different here than in college town: I miss Athens.

What's different here than dumbass Arizona: I miss elements of Phoenix.

What is so cool about Oregon? Amazon named Portland and Seattle the 2 most well-read cities in the U. S....Pollen.com ranked Eugene on Friday, June 5, 2015 as the nation's worst city for allergy sufferers. Salem and Portland came in second and third...Whole Foods is coming to Eugene (I'm amazed they're not here yet)...Black students at the U of O want their own "safe" zone, because they don't feel safe here (college isn't prison--you CHOSE to come to skool here)...Not cool; the Civic Stadium burned down on 6-29-15. (Don't we have a news section?)...

How Does Your Garden Grow? (Tales from our community garden plot): I went to the plot, sick, on Fri. 6-5-15. It all looks okay; so I watered. So?..6-7-15 early Sunday morning WALK by 2 sick people to the garden. It was pretty. We ate peas. We planted beets. She wouldn't let me water the mud...6-13-15 we drove to the garden together again, and we got some great work done (she did 80% of all the work, of course). I am going to be more helpful in the garden (he says, for the 1000th time)...6-20-15 Saturnday trip to saturday Market and garden; we did good (she did good, I watched). There was more...Static Babe and I went to the garden Sat. 6-27-15 at 7 am, trying to avoid the heat wave (that hasn't really come yet). My watering is appreciated! Basil is not quite ready to pick, but we got a few peas. It's moving along nicely...I water everyday; I am the Man!..

Life with Static Girl: She made for me a convenient and colorful wall chart to show the best/correct times to have my east-facing window and/or fan open/on during the short Summer here (I completely ignore it.). It is very helpful because I am not a meteorological witch like she is (she can control the weather, too). Did YOU know that the hottest part of the day is from 4 pm to 5 pm? I did NOT...She has an organic ketchup problem, and a canned olive problem (I am glad to help); the organic zuchini problem can be dealt with...From late June; in a fit of rage, she THREW my CD/Alarm clock across my room, breaking 3 of the little buttons on it. I then had to go to Fred Meyer and pay $10,000 ($10) of MY OWN money for a new alarm clock--with NO CD player!..

My FCP has this for me: I dreamed of her and me doing 'heckle porn' together; it was quite entertaining!..

Comments From The Peanut Gallery: Bruce is now Caitlyn Jenner. Okay...Subway is dropping the artificial? Okay...Nestle is in trouble for putting lead in with their noodles. Okay...New blood test tells every disease you've ever had. Nice...Every federal employee's info has been hacked!..Trump is running for President...A White kid shot up a Black S. C. church, and killed 9...2 crazy dangerous killer criminals escaped from a maximum security prison with the help of a prison worker female who wanted the pair to kill her husband on the outside (I couldn't MAKE shit up this good!)...(6-19-15 news:) "Obama Admin gives tips to illegals on getting work permits" (Aren't Republicans cute?)...Bristol Palin (one of my favorite teen moms) is taking a break from holding her son while preaching abstinence to unwed females so that she can (wait for it)...get pregnant...out of wedlock...again! She hasn't even named the father yet. Go Bristol!...

A thought to take with you: "Learn to meditate online." Let it breathe. That is funny!

The new 2015 Ford Expedition costs $64,000. And THAT is also funny!

Oregon Bumper Stickers: (beside a picture of Death holding a sickle, the words are) "I Should Have Texted More"...

A guy at the arcade was wearing a hat that said "I (HEART) Boobies!" (I LOVE Boobies). Yes. And it's very good that he had that written on his hat--because I might forget. I will make a shirt that says "I like to have a mouth on my dick."

Band names: "Drugstore Boner Pills" (album "Get Some!"), "Worst Case Ebola Scenario", "Vinegar Tits", "Invasivity", "Convenience Store Corndog Cleanse", "Dental Honeymoon" (album "Blood And swelling")





SIDEBAR 206

August 2015

(...last month we were...)


Reading: http://www.silverbearcafe.com/private/07.15/option.html ... The goddamned front page of the Sunday Commentary in the Register Guard says that the Civil War was about slavery. Fuck them, fuck you, and fuck all who believe that the Civil War was about slavery. You idiots...

Watching: I am currently watching my Sharp tv screen flicker, and it is very annoying...

Class Projects: "How To Be A Grown Up" on Tru tv makes her laugh at least twice every episode! That is a SHITLOAD of laughter for my Static Girl...

movies together: ha...

Shit I watch alone: NFL Network's "A Football Life"'s of Eric Dickerson, Mean Joe Greene, Ricky Williams, Cris Carter (LOVE those shows)...Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll Thursdays on FX..."Scream" is now an MTV show?.."Halt and Catch Fire" is my Sunday night show...

Comedians: Bill Burr "You People Are All The Same", Bill Burr "I'm Sorry You Feel That Way", https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxSDy0EL0jo...

Crappy cable movies: "John Wick", "Escape Plan", "Black & White" (stupid), "May" (almost brilliant), "Nitro Circus The Movie" (Travis Pastrana)...

Play it Again's: Hollywood is remaking the 'Vacation' movies. I hope Chevy Chase is earning some big green off of those..."Enemy Of The State" is still relevant...I rewatched the Alice in Chains "Guitar Center Sessions" interview/concert on Audio...30 For 30 on Bo Jackson...

Watching and Hearing: ZZ Top's "La Grange" was in a Geico motorcycle insurance commercial...A family sings Weezer's "Buddy Holly" in a Honda commercial...Watching and Hearing on my new Samsung tv! Oh I am about to go from 'not caring at all' about the AUD channel (Audio), to being one of its biggest fans! There will be many 'play it again's' too...It's being promoted heavily in the last week of July; on 7-31-15 AUD will be doing a new "Guitar Center Sessions" interview/concert with The Offspring. So I'll review that in August, baby!

Now with faster than dial-up internet; Youtubing: all the regulars...

Hearing: my desk is in shambles. I don't even know where my stack of CD's is. Maybe I should look for them--I usually keep good ones on my desk...

New on the radio; still don't have radio in my car...

Musical Purchases this month from the Tom Tucker discount wall at Skip's Records And CDWorld; my future place of employment, and permanent Barbie Dream Home: nothing...

Out and About: 7-26-15; 'out and about' at the Overtime Tavern for my poker game. I did not know that a new jukebox had been installed there. But all of a sudden I heard the beginning of NIN's "Copy Of A" and I nailed it! 'This is new Nine Inch Nails' I said, 'well, new in 2014 anyway,' 2 people were impressed by my name-that-song ability. What I'm saying is; the first song I heard on the new jukebox at the O/T was NIN, and THAT was pretty fucking cool...Chicago and The Temptations at Burger King...

Singing: "Lump"--Presidents of the USA, "46 + 2"--Tool, "Never There"--Cake, "Living Thing"--ELO, "Peg"--Steely Dan, "Radioactive"--Imagine Dragons, "Shaky Ground"--Delbert McClinton, "Use Me"--Bill Withers, "Forever And Ever Amen"--Randy Travis...

What I want today: A new tv, and maybe a new computer monitor...

New stuff this month or so: 7-2-15; driving by the big bank on W. 11th Ave. with the time/weather displayed, it was finally 100 degrees at 3:40 pm today, Thursday. So we did a full session with the redneck air-conditioner! I also got my car remote control a new battery at Radio Shack! I don't mind driving around in the new Buick air-conditioning...7-3-15, back up to 99 today! And I made salsa; X-rated, melt your lips, awww--does your throat hurt now?, SALSA! Woo...7-4-15 July 4th; apparently there was an earthquake in Springfield, OR today (8:43 am), and I slept through it (There is something profound as fuck, right there). Free fireworks tonight? No; we were hermits at home this year...The rumor was that the comic strip "Bloom County" might come back. This could be good!..Sitting at the stop light beside Taco Bell; there is a sign in the Taco Bell parking lot that says 'Avoid the line inside with the new Taco Bell app.'. Wow...7-16-15; my pinball tournament is now listed in the Eugene Weekly. Maybe someday you'll be as cool as I am...7-27-15; so the 24 inch Samsung tv is only $130 at Fred Meyer, but only has 720 resolution. The 24 inch Samsung computer monitor is at least $180, but has 1080 resolution. So how good are my eyes, really?..7-29-15 begins 3 days in a row of 100+ degrees; great...

This Month of bargain-shopping (Dollar Tree, Cash King, Big Lots, etc.): nope. I even bought antacids at Fred Meyer...

Occupational Hazards: Ha! How am I to be compensated for work I've already done? Let's figure out that little tidbit before anybody expects me to rush off and bust what very little is left of my ass for $7.25 an hour...

Personal shit for my own memory banks this month: 7-2-15; I'm back at Physical Therapy--now with Amber. She is going to really help me with my right arm!..7-8-15; Yes, actually! Amber is slowly going through many of the changes I have to make in my posture; sitting and standing (209 lbs.)...Starving myself to burn off excess fat is not the best idea; I should eat (less), AND exercise...I'm going to move to some kind of a new shaver after these last 3 Schick Quattro blades. It would appear that "800 Razors.com" or "Ultimate Shave" are made in the USA, which is important to me. We'll see...7-11-15; twisted my bed to give me floor-room to roll on my foam roller, and do other exercises. Bought my 4 ft. black body pillow; woo...7-13-15; finally cleaned out from under my bed, and now I have an exercise area!..7-14-15; had decent mobility today. Having the foam roller right beside my bed/first thing of the day helps! Physical therapy got me 4 new exercises to do, as well. Then I played some pinball, and talked to my neighbor about his new hybrid pot plant--I want to grow one someday soon. Now it's 10 pm Tuesday night, and I do have a few ways to stretch and squirm my back; so the pain should NOT get any worse, right? Sure it won't...So Tuesday night was good, and then the shitstorm came back. I didn't sleep well at all Tues. night, pain on the left, and numbness on the right. Then I was an hour late to see Shannon Wednesday morning on 7-15-15; 4 hours later I was home and in tears; took a nap. Hey look; I was right--the picture tube on the tv is dying. Nice. Luckily, I felt good enough to go play/run/win the pinball tournament Wednesday night. Then; even after almost 8 hours of sleep on Wednesday night (bad position), I still felt horrible Thursday. Then I went to see Dr. Slater the Neurologist (209 lbs. again today). He says my problems are not nerves. He and I also disagree about the pictures on my MRI--imagine that! Oh well; he's not the first idiot Dr. I've dealt with. Luckily I did get a full physical therapy session with Amber. She was very helpful. Bong hits and pain pills await; then I have to sleep and go hang with Shannon in the morning. Yes. Worked with Shannon for 7 hours on Friday 7-17-15, triple workout; it was good. Then there was a great dinner, AND dessert on Friday evening. Yay dessert! Later I would eat weed chocolate and many pain pills...Saturday 7-18-15 it got up to 99 degrees; so I sat with my redneck air-conditioner blowing me...Tuesday 7-21-15; after a rough day, I went and bought my new Samsung 28 inch tv for $200 at Fred Meyer ($100 off); it's very nice--even if not huge. And now I may go back and get the 24 inch Samsung tv for my new computer monitor...My neurologist didn't explain my MRI well, so my Dr. wants me to go back to the orthopedist and get some real advice. Stay tuned for how stupid this will all get...7-27-15 I have now ordered the "XFX AMD Radeon HD 5450 1GB GDDR3 VGA/DVI/HDMI Low-Profile PCI-Express Graphics Card HD545XZQH2;HD-545X-ZQH2" for $30 from Amazon so that I can hook up any kind of video monitor to my computer...7-28-15; it took over 2 hours to get out of bed. Multiple kinds of pain, which sucks, after a few good days in a row...7-30-15; over an hour to get out of bed, boo, but weighing 205 at physical therapy was nice...As I type THESE WORDS on 7-31-15, they are being seen on my new Samsung 24 inch tv, being used as a computer monitor ($130). The visuals are not perfect yet, but they are close. Happy Birthday to me! (I am DONE squinting at this shit!). Also on 7-31-15, I noticed that my right birdie finger tip is all swollen up. I thought it was just a splinter, but it is obviously much, much more...

Pinball and Golden Tee stuff: 7-1-15 "Weed Is Legal" Pinball Knights. 11 people, and I won it!..7-8-15 Pinball Knights. 8 people, and I won it!..7-15-15 Pinball Knights: 16 people, and I won it (even while in extreme pain)...7-22-15 Pinball Knights: 10 people, and I came in 2nd...7-29-15 Pinball Knights: 9 people, and I was 2nd...

Poker stuff: 7-5-15 Poker; 6 people, Becky won it...7-12-15 Poker; 7 folks, Ron A. and Rob split; Shannon and I went out early...7-19-15 Poker; 3 just Rob, Shannon + me. Winner take all! Me! I left with $75!..7-26-15 Poker; 8 people, and I was 3rd out. Shannon made it to 3rd place...

Grammar: Fuck you...

New foods this month: We love getting the extra veggies from Helen and Shannon. Plus; our garden is producing tiny tomatos and cucumbers now, along with tons of zuchini!..

This month of Blues Jamming: 7-9-15; set 1 was Brian C. + R. J. Herb on guitars, Z-Bass, John Powell sings + keys, w/Axel on drums! Set 2 was Brian C. + RJ again on guitars, Russ W. on bass, JP on keys, and Darcy drummed! Set 3 was Z-Bass, Brian C. + Steve Sheri (?) on guitars, JP, and axel drums. If there was a set 4, then I was far too drunk for it. I may have partied with DPW again...

My trials and trib.s as a critical believer in the concept of God: no

What's different here than in college town: no

What's different here than dumbass Arizona: no

What is so cool about Oregon? There were 3 new high temperature days in June (and 2 ties). Not so cool; on 7-1-15 our temperature hit a record 99, and on 7-2-15 we hit triple digits; 101 for a new record...ZipRecruiter.com names Eugene a top-10 energy tech city (Fort Collins is #4)...105 on July 30th, maybe 31st. whatever; it's been hot...

(New Sidebar Heading as of 7-1-15) Yes, Oregon's cool and all. Isn't weed also legal? Yes. It became legal for recreational marijuana use on 7-1-15. On 7-2-15 I bought some pot ice cream at one of my pharmacies. It is NOT vegan, so I am in trouble now. Oh well...I went back and got 2 dairy-free versions of weed ice cream. Yum!..7-7-15; I won my 2nd raffle at Emerald City Medicinals (7 grams). So I got ($60 worth) an eighth of Lamb's Bread, and an eighth of Lavender Delight. Go me!..

How Does Your Garden Grow? (Tales from our community garden plot): First week of July; we are already eating tomatos at, and pulling little lemon cucumbers out of our plot!..7-24-15 early morning (noon) gardening trip with my girlfriend. We picked the smaller cauliflower, and got more garlic!..

Life with Static Girl: 7-2-15: This is a vegan house. If I screw up again, I might get kicked out of here. And that would be bad...'The only thing lower than my ambition is her expectation of me.'...Her Clif bar flavor is Cool Mint Chocolate; mine is Berry Pomegranate Chia...

My FCP has this for me: nothing. Oh, she still loves me. We're just doing some quiet time right now...

Comments From The Peanut Gallery: A new dollar is coming in October...The TPP went through; so I guess we're all corporate fudge puppets now!..AT + T takes over Direct Tv (great)...Anthem to merge with Cigna...

A thought to take with you: "Life has become immeasurably better since I have been forced to stop taking it seriously."--Hunter S. Thompson

"I don't date for a reason. Because people are asshole covered dicks with shitbag filling. But I'm not bitter."--"Cass"; my new Facebook hero!

July 4th: "America: if mayonnaise wore flip flops and played air guitar."--Seth Milstein

"Four drinks, and I'm using 'fuck' like a comma!"--Facebook post

Oregon Bumper Stickers: who cares at this point?

Band names: "Conveyor Belt Sushi",





SIDEBAR 207

September 2015


(...last month we were...)


Reading: Hey fucker! Do you still believe that 6 million Jews died in German WW2 ovens? Read this: http://www.darkmoon.me/2015/faurissons-exposure-of-the-holocaust-hoax/

Watching: A Football Life of Jerry Rice, Steve McNair...Now that we have no working VCR in this house, we will be needing to trade up many things to DVD...Lazily scrolling through the 20 or so religious channels (think about that), I see that Jim Bakker has a new show. If is co-host is Jessica Hahn, then I'd watch that...We had a preview weekend of Starz and Encore channels; not bad...

Class Projects: How To Be A Grown Up, Oregon Art Beat, a Simpson's 'Mythbusters', CSI Cyber,

movies together: She doesn't have that kind of time...

Shit I watch alone: Jon Stewart's last week on The Daily Show was extraordinary. He will be missed...Did I also see that Aqua Teen Hunger Force is now over, too? Born 9-9-01, till 8-15?...Pre-season football, bitches! Football is coming, and I cannot wait. This weak ass sports Summer is bullshit. But serious congrads to the San Jose Sabercats for beating the Jacksonville Sharks in Arena Bowl XXVIII (ANY pro football is okay with me)...I should be watching "Maron" every week; he's funny...There was almost a Kenny Mayne week on Sportscenter; he did like 3 in 5 nights; woo...My friend Jon S. hosted an Oregon Lens on OPB, and the next night his film "The Pun Bus" ran on another Oregon Lens. Very cool...The League makes me laugh hard...Another thing I should be watching every week is this prime time, network "Last Comic Standing" show...

Comedians: Natasha Leggero "Live At Bimbo's", Liza Treyger and Hampton Yount 'Half Hour's',

Crappy cable movies: Horrible Bosses 2, Disconnect, most of Amazing Spiderman 2, Joyride 3 "Roadkill", In Time (was like a rehash of Logan's Run),

Play it Again's: Clerks 2, Moneyball, I Am Chris Farley, the 2010 remake of "I Spit On Your Grave", Ancient Aliens: The Ultimate Evidence "The Tesla Experiment" (4 times), The Princess Diaries,

Watching and Hearing: "Stranglehold" in the new Carl's Jr. 'All Natural' burger commercial...Yes; what about The Offspring's "Guitar Center Sessions"? The Offspring's 2015 Guitar Center Sessions was excellent; thank you Nic Harcourt. Also; Silversun Pickups on GCC...I saw Modest Mouse on Seth Meyers...Is Norm MacDonald one of the new Colonel Sanders? It sure sounds like his voice...

Now with faster than dial-up internet; Youtubing: Holy Fucking Shit! Have you seen my favorite Depeche Mode song (It's No Good), AND my favorite Cure song (Fascination Street), performed live onstage together? Yes; I cried (lots of crying this month) "https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I16ZTqlI-CM"...

Hearing: Trent Reznor wants me to pay $10 a month for some music service. No. I'll go with what legendary cartoonist Stan Lee says about how comics are like boobies; replacing the word "comics" with "CD's"; 'CD's on the internet are great, but I'd rather hold one in my hand.' In your honor, Trent, I bought a CD of yours this month. You're welcome...

New on the radio; my only radio is the oldies station I wake up to. Ain't nothing 'new' on it. Not my fucking problem...

Musical Purchases this month from the Tom Tucker discount wall at Skip's Records And CDWorld; my future place of employment, and permanent Barbie Dream Home: They had no NIN I wanted; their loss.

Out and About: I hear good stuff, and then forget it. Who the fuck cares about programmed internet channels anymore anyway?

Singing: "Fix Me Now"--Garbage, "Even Deeper"--NIN, "Flawed Like A Diamond" and "Sugarless"--Fig Dish, "Work For Food"--Dramarama, "Blue Skies"--Willie Nelson, "Ice Cream Man"--Van Halen, whistling "The Munsters" tv theme (dude, that's another instrumental), "Tragedy"--Bee Gees, "Ready To Go"--Republica,

What I want today: I want to get my stress relieved!..I also want the new jaw pain removed...I also want for my Dad to remember the gift giving rules for me...I want to help about 7 specific people take some naps...

New stuff this month or so: A MONEY idea. As the next door neighbor to a new grower of a 'back porch pot plant', I have an idea/request. The 5-gallon bucket has been a fantastic starter box for the now 1-month old plant (7-14-15). But even after 1 replanting (8-9-15), it is clearly not enough room for the plant to really flourish. What is needed now is a 10-gallon aluminum mop bucket, on wheels, with a 2-inch drain hole on each side that can easily be opened or shut, from the outside. And in the middle of this bucket, on the sides, will be an area that could have holes punched into it, so there could be a total of 4 drain holes. That's my idea; a 10-gallon mop bucket, on wheels, with 2 easily opened or shut drain holes, and the potential of 2 more permanent drain holes on the sides (if it lived outside only). And it's on wheels; so it's portable, and easy to move around in the sunlight. Okay; where's my money?..Monday 8-24-15 at Dr. White's crappy scale I weighed 207--which is good!..Cars still get pulled over all the time on my road out here, especially Friday and Saturday nights, and I listen to the people squirm through their DUI dances while I LOUDLY do bong hits. I also cough loudly...One bit of humor from an otherwise bad night: (while walking to Blues Jam on TH 8-20-15) I know I'm getting old now--I can hardly walk and light my pipe at the same time anymore...I've got a cinder block on my desk holding my monitor up high; now you know...With Static Parents' $50 in gift cards I Amazon-ordered and got The Esential Bill Hicks, Inside Job (movie), and "How To Destroy Angels"--NIN (I am cool)...

This Month of bargain-shopping (Dollar Tree, Cash King, Big Lots, etc.): For those of you not in Eugene, there is much more stuff in the Dollar Tree parking lot now. Jealous?..

Occupational Hazards: It should be fun too see how much money Blairally is ready to pay me for all of my services so far; 2012 through 2014; $4K? $3K?

Personal shit for my own memory banks this month: I enter August with nose problems, a dick scrape, and a right birdie finger infection...8-2-15; after poker, and biking to the garden, I returned the 24 inch tv to Fred Meyer today. It would normally be 'exchange only', but I got a gift card out of it for $123...8-3-15 Monday. I had slept hard with lots of pain pills Sunday night, but managed to get up before 1 pm and be very productive Monday. Almost a regtular Monday evening, except for going to see Dr. KC (night Dr. at my regular Dr's office). She says my right birdie finger tip is just a regular nail infection, not too big of a deal, and prescribed some keflex or something. Later on, while soaking it in warm water, the blister popped and oozed everywhere. Finger Zit! Yuck. Up till 8 am Tuesday, then passed out to a not-too-hot afternoon (85). Up at 2 pm. Finished Monday cleaning and cooked rice. Rode on the foam roller for an hour; major low back pain, but it can be dealt with. P/T at 5 pm; my monitor comes home with Girlfriend today! Got the monitor, went to P/T. Back home to bike to garden, then disappear to Fred Meyer for a couple of hours. Back home to set up new monitor. It's nice. Also bought today; I joined 800razors.com or whatever it is, for $15...8-5-15 Wed.s, woke up at 1 pm again. Not as bad right arm pain today--the fire is down to about pain level 5, for a welcome change. It still hurts, just not so much. Totally unmotivated, though. I biked to the garden, and cooked rice. Dinner, dessert, and then Pinball Knights; I came in 8th. Thursday 8-6-15 was a very bad morning--which may be expected, considering how much walking and effort I put in to Wednesday nights. Spent an hour sitting on the shower floor, crying, but that's not weird at all. Then I biked to the garden, and got ready for physical therapy at 5 pm; it kicked my butt, and I could already feel it. So what? I would meander around until after 8 pm, then head home to watch tons of new tv, and start drinking heavily. Turns out; drinking heavily, added to massive body pain, makes (8-7-15) Friday morning a non-issue (it didn't happen). Also; Friday afternoon was a non-issue (also didn't happen). I got out of bed by 4 pm, maybe, and still could barely walk. This is fun! I wanted to go to Blairally, but didn't have the full urge to deal with that stress. My own father mailed me a gift card for some trailhead tree-fort thing, Belknap, in Oregon--as if I would go do something like that. I mean; I don't send him gift certificates for pinball arcades in Ocala; both of my parents need to stop projecting their shit onto me. But that's okay; I'll miss them when they're gone, right? Also; got my 800razors.com box (The Ultimate Shave) in the mail. I FINALLy could get dressed and leave the house around 10 pm. Went to Fred Meyer and got some groceries; hardly cried at all in the store. So I came home and started watching more tv (because I don't watch enough). Went to bed before 1 am, and with just a few pee breaks, and one crying pause, I slept in till 9. That was nice. So my back doesn't hurt nearly as bad as Thursday or Friday--so that's good. Went to the garden with Cheri (a weak visit), and now I'm here, trying to figure out what's next. I went out for some lunch, and then to Blairally for some pinball therapy! It's so nice and quiet in there today--it's like the people are avoiding me (ha, I wish). Back home after 5 to bike back to the garden. Now home at 6:30 pm. Started drinking at 9pm, and now it's after 5 am, Sunday. Happy Birthday to me--after I throw up..Slept in on 8-9-15, my 50th birthday, until 12 noon. I missed a garden, and a P. O. Box walk; oh well. Some of us are hungover. But I foam-rolled around, and got to my feet in less than 30 minutes. My big task today was to replant the neighbor's pot plant, and it may have gone really well! Then I went to pick up Shannon at 2:30 pm for poker. Poker at 3 went great; I came in 2nd with a birthday split! Then home to bike to the garden, for a regular garden trip. Since I have a colonoscopy on Monday before noon, I will not be going out for anything alcoholic; I did go back to Fred Meyer for some good birthday deli dinner (look at me smartly saving tons of $). Now I'm at home at 9 pm with Black Velvet, root beer, and lots of tv to go along with my new computer monitor!..Too bad that I couldn't sleep at all Sunday night, and (8-10-15) slept through my butt-probe appointment (gastroenterology). Oh well. They're saying it's all my fault, and I'm saying that I didn't set up the appointment before 2 pm. So I may not be getting a fist in my ass from them. Their loss. Feeling 'like crap' continued for most of Monday, and I slept through any chance of dinner or companionship with Cheri, which also means no house-cleaning, and now I'll be up all night again. But before the total loss of Monday, I did bike to the garden to pick up some tomatos and cucumbers. Then I would stay up most of Monday night, and take care of the piggies at 5 am. To Tuesday 8-11-15. I got some sleep, though not enough. It took less than an hour to get up and going (thank you foam roller). And this theme of 'just barely getting by' would be prevalent today. I got out of the house for a bit--to give Cheri some space. Along with Shannon in the morning, my MRI-reading appointment at Slocum is at 2:10 pm Wednesday. But I got a reminder call that my appt. was now on Thursday at 2:10 pm. So I would try to not stay up too late Tuesday night, which never works, and I expected as much. So I had Cheri wake me up at 7 am, and I went to Shannon's at 8:30, just to be sent home (the other person showed up). Back home and to bed; and since I don't have to get up to go to Slocum at 2 pm, I just slept. I missed everything at home Wednesday; no dinner, no companionship, nothing. All I did was shave my nasty face for the first time in weeks. Why? Because my first shave with the new 800razors.com 3-blade happens Friday; this is the last shave with the Shick Quattros for a while. So I went to run MY Pinball Knights on Wednesday night at 7, and it went great. Then I would come home and drink heavily. There had been no bike-ride on Wednesday, but that's okay; I'll hit the garden on Thursday, after physical therapy, which is after Slocum. So Thursday morning 8-13-15 happens; yes, morning. Up before 12 noon, foam-rolling, exercise-balling, still in intense pain, but dealing with it! I can naviagate to Slocum, so I am off! Turns out; did I remember that Dr. P was a robo-babe? She's like a 90 lb. gymnast/Dr. combo. Wow. And I was serious, but still made her laugh, too. She says that BOTH of my shoulders are screwed, and what's weird to her is that my right one hurts SO MUCH, and the left one hardly hurts AT ALL. She thinks that is super odd. Great. Amazing those medical professionals; one Dr. at a time, it's me! (It's what I do) So then she shoots me up with the steroids, and the numbing agent. Okay? We LIKE the steroids and numbing agents; In fact; let's have more of both, please. Hey bitches! It's hard to complain about the pain when you can't even feel your hurt shoulder. Oh, now this is nice. Is this what the day is like for people with no pain? I like this a lot. Later I would go do a short run of physical therapy with Dr. Amber at 5:40 pm. But we can't do much P/T when the actual shoulder in question is completely numbed out. Poor Amber; she had another really easy day with me. So then I head home. On to the bike, heading for the garden. Brought back lots of stuff; even a frisbee-sized pattycake (pattypan is the real word). Stayed up all night Thursday night, and as the steroid numb went away, I discovered that I only have a couple of Vicodin left. Scratch that--ZERO Vicodin left. Now what am I going to do? Well; not eat as much Vicodin for a week, that's for damn sure. Shit. Maybe I have some emergency Vicodin somewhere. So I was up at 4 am to feed the piggies (every day this week, huh?). And I planned to have a much better day today, Friday, 8-14-15. So I was up after 1 pm, not too bad. I started on stuff; mailed off 2 packages, went and picked more garden stuff, then came home to cook and clean. I was doing both, well, when girlfriend came home 45 minutes early. She brought in the mail, and I had a mystery package from somewhere--and it had some perfume on it! (Women still want me!) I already had made pasta sauce using all of the pre-Thursday tomatos (very smart), and our dinner was excellent! Then we had conversations and companionship, yay! And then it's Friday night; I did some minor kitchen cleaning, and now I am almost all caught up on tasking, which is good, because my whole right side is hurting again (arm + leg, both! Oh the fun!). But I can't scream at home, so I scream on the drive back to Fred Meyer for some dinner (not that I have EVER had road rage issues), then by Sweet Tree Farms to brag about my plant, and then home to set up camp...I was up till 4 am, then crashed and tried to get up at
10 am Saturday 8-15-15. I would be up by noon, which is not bad at all, but Static Girl was already doing her walks and stuff; I was left here alone. By the time I was ready to get out, she had come back. So I bike rode to the garden alone to water and pick cucumbers. I felt a little better, no tears today, but with the back pain, and the new jaw pain over the dead tooth, there was no way I could go over to Shannon's birthday cook out. And I really wanted to. Back at home, I was e-mailing to Wisconsin and getting hungry. So I went out for Super Taco, got a car wash, groceries, and a new building brick for a computer monitor stand. I am cool. Home at 6. Got tired at 7 pm, slept till 11 pm, and now what? Still up at 7 am Sunday, but will sleep soon. Maybe. Yes; there was a nap. And then I would get up to go play poker 8-16-15. Picked Shannon up, and we had 7 people. I ate my last 2 pain pills and felt MUCH better. I would take 2nd place at poker to Shane. Took Shannon home, then biked to the garden. Groceries, then I'm heading downtown to see the big comedy show for Chris Castles. It was excellent; Andy Andrist is hilarious. Home at midnight Sun. to watch some tv and pass out by 3 am, so maybe I can have a Monday. Up at 11 am Monday, foam-rolled, big balled, and I'm up. Coffee, a bike trip to the garden, a drive to the bank, and then I'm getting ready for Monday night. It's too bad that companionship is taking such a hit because of my injuries. Oh well. I did the best I could to fake a good mood, and did lots of extra Monday cleaning (smart stress release). To the Fred Meyer deli for dinner, and a couple of Throwback Dews from Mari Dart. Home to do an hour+ on the exercise ball. Not horrible. I would stay up and watch tv till dawn. I can't sleep, and can't stay up. It's like the 90's sleep schedule, but not the 90's body. Oh the fun!..And then I slept till 7 pm Tuesday! Go me! To Fred Meyer for dinner, which was also breakfast? Sure. I would stay up all night and bike to the garden at 7 am Wednesday, getting ready for the Eugene heat wave (99 Wednesday, 96 even after 7 pm). Got some more sleep by 9 am Wednesday morning. Then I would get up at 1-ish pm, to do lots of foam-rolling and exercise balling. Still didn't feel very good--plus my left jaw is throbbing under the broken tooth, but hey, that's my life. Fuck you. By the time Cheri got home Wednesday, I was ready for another nap. So I took one. Up for Pinball Knights Wednesday, which I won. Home after midnight, and crashed around 2-ish am. Go me! Up around 10 am Thursday (8-20-15). Tons of stuff to do; and I may do some of it. Then again, maybe not. I'm a busy guy; foam rolling, and exercise balling, oh the fun continues! But then I got many errands run, and will go do physical therapy at 4:20 pm. Yes; 4:20--I planned it like that! Home after p/t, and I started calling people about Thursday night. Ryker said he'd Blues Jam with me, so we wound up down there, playing golf. Fuchs and Al teamed up on me to try and pull my pants down--in the bar, so I am done with them. I drank like my usual crazy. Woke up Friday afternoon in my bed, but not knowing how I got here. Great. I made some dinner for Cheri and me, but then went back to bed. Up again Friday night at 9:30 pm. The back pain is pretty bad tonight. So I drank and ate pain pills--imagine that! Stayed up all night watching aliens and Moneyball, then fed the piggies at 5 am Sat. To bed at 7 ish. Slept till 4 pm Saturday 8-22-15. Woke up and biked to the garden, brought home some more garlic. Then drove to Fred Meyer for dinner and groceries. Back home to call Mom. It only took her about 5 minutes to piss me off and hang up on her (poor grammar). Good job, Mom! So it's 9 pm Saturday, and my schedule is wide open! Yes, but I am boring--so I will just stay home with my booze, weed, and pain pills. We watched movies, alien shows, and re-ran Kenny Mayne Sportscenters. He said it was "LSD", so I named my neighbor's plant "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds", and he loves it! Bed at 7 am. Then up at noon on Sunday 8-23-15...Did some exercises, and some foam-rolling, and managed to get out of here at 2:30 pm to go pick up Shannon for poker. My mouth hurts; which is a nice change from all of this back pain (not really). So we would get pain pills, and crash + burn at poker. Took Shannon home, picked up their old hose, went to the garden, then back home. I would stay in and be a good boy Sunday night. Up till 4 am, fed piggies, then crashed. Dr. White's appointment at 2 pm Monday 8-24-15. Got more prescriptions from him, and we'll re-do our colonoscopy appt. with somebody else. Good. Then I came home and set up dinner for my wonderful girlfriend, we had some quality time together, I did some good Monday housework, then went to Fred Meyer for dinner. Afterward, I came home to try to go to sleep early for a change, but stayed up all night again, fed piggies at 5 am, did some crazy stretching exercises, and got SOME sleep as the sun came up. It's like a fucking fairy tale over here...So Tuesday didn't really begin until late afternoon, with foam-rolling and exercise balling, then I went back to Fred Meyer for dinner (breakfast?), home for some communication, then I would stay up all night again, to feed piggies at 5 am, crazy stretch, and try to get some sleep as the sun came up again. The fairy tale continues. Up before noon on Wednesday (no way), to do more crazy exercises, bike to the garden, then cook some more cool pasta dinner. Oh yeah. My girl had a really crappy Wednesday--so I was good about cheering her up! And then I got out early--to give her some time alone. To Blairally at 7 to get ready for Pinball Knights, which I won. Then I went shopping at WalMart, and home to unwind at 12:30 am...Sleep at 5 am, after feeding piggies. Up a few times; numb right arm, then burning right arm, and then up for good around 1:30 pm Thursday. Not feeling great; much exercising. Some crying, too; that's always good. I get to see Amber p/therapy at 5:40--that's all I can think about. But I biked to the garden and picked 1 cuc and some tomatos for my Queen. I may have watered our plot during my amazing physical conquests at the garden--I only almost fell over twice. Talent. Back to Fred Meyer for dinner, and then I'll spend the rest of Thursday night trying to sleep. Nope, no sleep. So I fed the piggies at 4 am, and took enough sleeping pills to finally get some shut-eye after 7 am...Up Friday 8-28-15 at 2 pm. How did I miss my alarm? Whatever. I'm kind of sore from working out with Amber yesterday (good pain?). So I'm exercise balling, foam-rolling, and trying not to cry. The right arm is going with a slow burn today--not the normal speed/flare up/hot flash kind of pain. This is more like a dull hot ache, similar to how my right leg does often. Interesting. But I'm still going to cook, and go to the garden. As I left at 3, Girlfriend came home. I told her to shower, and I'd get us Cornbread Cafe when I got back. Did a great garden run, then came home and tried to give my girl a good Friday evening. I was super entertaining, and we had all the interest in some companionship time, but once again I had an equipment malfunction. I am not loving how regular those are becoming. Then she went to bed, and I caught up all of my weekly cleaning. Back to Fred Meyer for an $18 living room light bulb, and some other stuff. Then back home to veg and exercise in front of the tv. Shit, my arm is hurting really bad now. So even if I COULD sleep, this solar flare in my right arm would wake me up. The fairy tale continues. 4 am already? Gee, where does the time go? Almost 10 am now! Girlfriend and I may be going to the garden. Maybe some gardening will make me tired. Yes! Girlfriend made our trip to the garden excellent, and she did most of the work (duh). I would go to sleep around noon Sat., and it was pretty good sleep, thank you. Woke up at 6 pm 8-29-15 Sat. on my own. There's pre-season football (Seahawks/Chargers), Arena Bowl XXVIII (San Jose Sabrecats beat the Jacksonville Sharks), and there's big ESPN boxing tonight, as well. Yay football. One more little league world series baseball highlight might send me over the edge. Talked to Mom. She's good. Ish. I would stay up past 4 am, against my will, only to set my alarm incorrectly, so that I would have missed my Sunday morning personal assistant shift, except for Cheri waking me up. But I went and got my 3 hours in; yay. Now home to shower and go back for poker. At the poker game, Shane showed up drunk and wanting to argue. I tolerated it, but then shut down. So; employees of this bar perform pre-meditated assault on me, and my own poker players verbally and physically abuse me, too. Yeah. With bar people like this, who needs enemies? The fairy tale continues. Took Shannon home, then went by Fred Meyer before coming home and going to bed at 8:30 pm. Slept till 1 am, so that's almost 5 hours, which is pretty good. So then I got up to watch more Ancient Aliens on History Channel. 6 am 8-31-15 Monday now. What wil happen next? I went back to sleep for a couple of hours, then got up and set up my SS phone meeting for 10-13-15. Then I biked to the garden, and am now back at home. Wow. Bandages are NOT my friend; as one of my many issues was almost healed, and then it appears to have taken a few steps back. Great. So companionship will be missed again tonight. And the left side of my mouth is still throbbing like wisdon teeth pain; have I mentioned that 'the fairy tale continues' lately? And I have been obsessed all day by negative energy about both bars and the bullshit they contain. I needed, and took, a few naps on Monday--because I am having trouble containing my rage. I did not vacuum, but I did some cleaning Monday night. Man I want a gun. But instead of a gun, yet, I am just going to re-assert myself as the Pit Boss of poker next week. Somebody will be kissing my ass. That will be fun!..

Pinball and Golden Tee stuff: 8-5-15 Pinball Knights; 10 people, Andy's format. I was 8th, but bargained my way into Fourthmeal!..8-12-15 Pinball Knights; 8 people, MY format--the PinGolf/every game hybrid, and it went great. I was 5th...8-19-15 Pinball Knights! 10 people choosing 10 machines, and I won it ($30)...8-26-15 Pinball Knights; double-elimination on the 9 PinGolf games: 9 people, and I won it ($27)...

Poker stuff: 8-2-15 poker; John and Shannon split; I was third...8-9-15 My Birthday Poker; 6 people, newbie Linda and I split ($65 for me)!..8-16-15 Poker (Shannon's Birthday is 8-19), 7 people, Shane was 1st, I was 2nd ($55)...8-23-15 Poker; 4 people, John and Shannon won it...8-30-15 Poker; 7, people, Ron O. won it...

Grammar: "1 in 5 kids face hunger." That is a sign on grocery carts where I shop. Now; you may not see what's wrong with that statement. But I don't care about you, kids, OR hunger. I care about grammar.

New foods this month: Not new, but on 8-14-15 Friday I Magic Bulleted some incredible sauce using tomatos and garlic from our garden. Combined with fake meat, and poured over penne rigate pasta; yum...Blue Sky Soda; it's about as healthy as soda gets; okay. Root beer and Cola. And this new Zevia soda is okay, too...

This month of Blues Jamming: I went on 8-20-15, where I was physically abused by an on-duty bartender, AND, an off-duty bartender. So I am DONE with that bar, except for Sundays when they pay me $50 JUST to walk the fuck in there. Blues Jam itself was fine; Z-Bass, Ricky Johnson, Ralph Novack, Jimmy D. drums, and John Powell on keys all night. Too bad that was my last one--I'll miss the musicians. Oh well...

My trials and trib.s as a critical believer in the concept of God: God isn't doing a fan club. You're either in, or you're out...

What's different here than in college town: Athens gets a new crop of 10,000 17 and 18 yr. olds this month; I bet that'd be fun to witness again...

What's different here than dumbass Arizona: Oh, please.

What is so cool about Oregon? Oregon Leads The Nation In Farm To School Funding...A 31 yr. old very hot-for-teacher here was sending naughty pictures and texts to one of her 15 yr. old male students. She got fired, and I am shocked...It's probably just the economy, but; there are 2 Eugene bars currently for sale, and there's a full church for sale here on W. 18th Ave., about a mile from our apartment. Also; don't forget the old Blockbuster location on Seneca, and the Wendy's building/drive-through on W. 11th is still just sitting there. Near that Wendy's is an 8,000 ft. warehouse for rent/sale. Come do some business in Eugene!

Yes, Oregon's cool and all. Isn't weed also legal? 8-2-15; I'm going to smoke more of the flower I already have, stop buying so many edibles, and spend my $ better. I have to get a new pot card..

How Does Your Garden Grow? (Tales from our community garden plot): By 8-15-15 Static Girl has been eating 50 tomatos a day, for weeks, and she is now sick of them. Oh well...

Life with Static Girl: I have been leaving her some great notes in early August, and now mid-August...My Girlfriend has TONS of sense--she is super smart! But the sense of "smell"; no, she lacks that one (scents)...I now call her Coca-Cola 'frame by frame stinky porn', and she does not like that at all...

My FCP has this for me: She sent me a late birthday package of Animaniacs figurines! What an incredible birthday gift! She obviously still wants me...

Comments From The Peanut Gallery: Half of all the total presidential campaign contributions for 2016 come from only 400 families in the world...(Real news headline from 8-15-15) "Japan raises warning level on volcano not far from nuclear plant"...Subway's Jared F. is on trial for child porn, and his wife is leaving him (Wait; Jared was married? Did he also have an Ashley Madison account?)...Yes. The Ashley Madison affair website saga continues; 37 million potential cheaters to be exposed?..

A thought to take with you: Just a thought: the popular vote does not elect the president. Your President in 2016 will either be a Republican (probably), or a Democrat (less likely). All of these CUM STAINS; YES, ALL OF THESE FUCKING DUMBASS, MOUTH-BREATHING CUM STAINS WHO THINK THAT THERE WILL EVER BE A THIRD PARTY PRESIDENT--ARE HILARIOUS. They are trolling Facebook/Twitter/all social media (I guess), and having what THEY think are intelligent bar conversations about 'the direction of this country', how 'we're ready for a change' and other amusing shit like that. These are probably the same idiots who think that America is a democracy; which it never was, is not now, and never will be--I LOVE those people. Shhh. Wake-up call; the electoral college, the people who ACTUALLY decide the Presidency, they've been bought off by corporations for more than 50 years.

“Society’s laws can be violated – the laws of physics cannot”--Joshua Blakeney."

"Anti-social behaviour is a trait of intelligence in a world full of conformists."--Nikola Tesla

"...You don't see any illegal Mexicans in China."--Michelle Bachmann (Why can't she run for President?)



Oregon Bumper Stickers: "I Dig Herbs", "Give Bees A Chance", "Save a Cow; Eat A Vegetraian",


Band names: "Premature Panic", "Healthy Soda", "Medical Meth", "Dirty Van Meat"--Rachel Maddow,





SIDEBAR 208

October 2015


(...last month we were...)


Reading: Did you know that 6 million Jews ALSO died in WWI? Yeah; the story didn't fly AT ALL in 1918. But they learned what they did wrong for propaganda to work, and made it stick really well after WWII. Here; go read it for yourself: http://renegadetribune.com/the-six-million-myth/...Are we really going to give Iran $150 million? http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2015/07/05/lawmakers-alarmed-iran-nuclear-windfall/29652429/

Watching: I have spoken before about a 2004(?) History Channel(?) show (Look; the show exists somewhere, and must be on Youtube) on the JFK assassination that showed colored laser beams from the school book depository window which mimic the exact trajectory of 3 bullets from the window, and coincide almost perfectly with the car's movements. I recall the conclusion being well over 90% absolutely assured that all 3 bullets did come from that particular window, and all less than 6(?) seconds apart. Why the government doesn't make conspiracy theorists (like me) watch this show is beyond me. Science can explain things sometimes...Which brings me to my next History Channel documentary; I watched it with Shannon in late August, or early September 2015. This show was about the actual dropping of the twin towers on 9-11-01. Now; it's not about the controlled demolition of WTC7, not about the lack of bodies or plane parts, not about faked cell phone calls, and not about the actual reasons our government wanted some things in those 2 buildings to be "lost" forever. This show was about the melting aluminum in the center of the buildings, which easily COULD explain the official story. When melting aluminum hits water, there are multiple explosions that would obviously sound like bombs, and these explosions would create something very similar to what happened to both the twin towers. This documentary was put together by people who questioned the government's story, and almost all of the skeptics could agree on the 'aluminum' explanation of the towers dropping. That's it, though. WTC7, impossible cell phone calls, lack of physical evidence, black boxes? THAT'S all still 'government research'. But the actual dropping of the 2 main towers--maybe that is now explained. You're welcome.

Class Projects: I made her watch a bit about Eugene resident Randy Cramer, but Static Girl believes none of it. Oh well; at least she looked at it with me, and she agreed that it WOULD be an INCREDIBLE science fiction story! No shit, baby!..The rehashes of the last two Dr. Who's, with new Dr. Who on 9-16-15...A Castle at the end of September!

movies together: she no longer watches movies.

Shit I watch alone: Hangar 1 UFO Files "Far Side Of The Moon": I recorded one about crazy stuff, and the final story was all about Eugene rsident Randy Cramer, who was 'drafted', at age 17, into a 20 year military tour of Moon/Mars, and was brought back 20 years later, right back into his bed at his parents' house (still 17), approximately 15 minutes after his 20 year tour was over, via a wormhole. If I understand the wormhole theory, then he performed important human race/settlement stuff for many years, and was then brought back to earth in 1987 just a few minutes after he was originally 'taken'. That's fucking cool. And no wonder people think Eugene is just full of weirdos and hippies...Double Monday Night Football! How long has it taken to get this in place? Me likes! Wait; it was only for ONE night? That's regular stupid for the NFL..And then Thursday night football is just 3 days away...The Dan LeBatard show on ESPN U is very good...9-28-15 Trevor Noah took over The Daily Show (why not Samantha Bee?)

Comedians: Michelle Buteau + Barry Rothbart Half Hour's, Dana Gould "I Know It's Wrong", Andy Woodhall and Brooks Wheelan Half Hour's, the hilarious Ian Karmel on the Late Late Show, Brian Regan "Live From Radio City Music Hall",

Crappy cable movies: "Now You See Me", "The Killer Inside Me", "Rounders", Meatloaf "In And Out Of Hell", "Ticks", "The To Do List", 2013's "Nurse" (had some amazing potential)

Play it Again's: I watch so many things over and over; you might think I have a problem...Anything + Everything Dave Attell; "Captain Miserable", "Road Work", give me more...Mr. Twin Towers (NOT) Steve Rannazzisi "Manchild"

Watching and Hearing: ELO in a Wrangler commercial; hotdogs, jeeps or jeans, whichever Wrangler it was. But I heard 'Don't Bring Me Down'...Selco; A local Eugene credit union has a tv commercial where a guy with his garage band buddies are banging out "Song 2" by Blur; I was impresed!..Showtime for 4 months brings me "Jimi Hendrix: Electric Church" (excellent)...The Dead Weather on Colbert 9-14-15...AWOLNATION (w/orchestration) on Seth Myers late 9-15...

Now with faster than dial-up internet; Youtubing: more 'basement tape' Bill Hicks stuff...Fuck you and all you stand for! I pull up around 10 specific songs when I'm sitting at the computer. I sing parts of these songs everyday, without fail. So the following list is of songs that I not only hear all the time, but also sing parts of all the time. You may already know "Now Is The Time"--Crystal Method, and "Panic Switch"--Silversun Pickups (Static Girl can no longer stand either of those songs--I have played them too much). 2 other Gran Turismo songs are "As Heaven Is Wide"--Garbage, and "My Favourite Game"--Cardigans. I also hear "46 + 2"--Tool, the LONG (8:49) version of "Fascination Street"--the Cure, 3 versions of "Hey Man Nice Shot"--Filter, some form of "Trip Like I Do"--Filter/Crystal Method, "Dream On"--Depeche Mode, and the newest ones would be the "It's No Good On Fascination Street"--Depeche Mode/the Cure, "Various Methods Of Escape"--Nine Inch Nails (hearing it now),

Hearing: The top CD on my desk is the Were-Jaguars II CD (a band led by my pinball buddy Chad R.); it has some really good elements in it! Tracks 5 and 13 are my favorites...Not to make you feel old or anything (me, actually), but not only is my favorite band Pink Floyd now 50, but also English art-rock band the Who has turned 50 as well. You're welcome...3 new CD's on my desk this month! NIN's "How To Destroy Angels", Bill Hicks' "Flying Saucer Tour" vol. 1, and David Gilmour's "Rattle That Lock"

New on the radio; ha! New on the radio is so cute. What the Hell was I thinking? Perhaps I will have OLD radio in my car someday.

Musical Purchases this month from the Tom Tucker discount wall at Skip's Records And CDWorld; my future place of employment, and permanent Barbie Dream Home: yeah; but even if I am retired, and on disability, I can still walk down to Skip's Records And CDWorld to intern, or dust the shelves...Bought the new David Gilmour "Rattle That Lock" on 9-21-15...

Out and About: Sirius "The Blend" at Carl's Jr...

Singing: "Buddy Holly"--Weezer, "Don't Let Me Get Me"-Pink, "I Don't Believe"--Stabbing Westward,

What I want today: I want a free year of Direct TV for their piss poor customer service, zero explanations of my problems, and crap attitudes of their employees on the first college football Saturday of the year...9-10-15; long phone call with Direct TV. I got an apology and some free stuff...

New stuff this month or so: Well, last month-ish. The hard rock radio station in town did a total employee flush, and format change. So; a bunch of people got fired, at least one syndicated show was cancelled, and now the station is doing the same saturated soft rock rotation (oh wait, they call it 'world class' rock) same as 3 other local stations. I miss DOING radio, but not the stupid business of it...9-1-15; I must have missed a day of watering my neighbor's plant 'Lucy', because it is wilting and almost dead. Boo. Oh; it died...2015's Miss America is from Georgia; the Miss Illinois (who didn't win, obviously) was from Anna...I ordered sheets, more Grape Seed Extract, and the Bill Hicks "Flying Saucer Tour" CD from Amazon...9-17-15 Physical Therapy with Dr. Amber; she has approved a towel on the driver's seat, and a smaller roll in the back at the hip bones--it makes driving much easier...

This Month of bargain-shopping (Dollar Tree, Cash King, Big Lots, etc.): I hardly went; just to get baggies and pregnancy tests.

Occupational Hazards: Not only am I retired (fuck you, world), but also I am applying for disability; so we may need to alter this heading--unless I am interning/dusting at Skip's Records And CDWorld. That would be cool--I could do that.

Personal shit for my own memory banks this month (My Journal): Let's talk about my right arm 'burning' pain, because apparently I am quite misunderstood about how badly my right arm hurts. I KNOW that there is nothing I can do about the hot, burning sensations that often create muscular ticks and twinges of massive discomfort--other than to get hooked on pain pills again. No thank you. This pain; not my lower back pain, not any face or tooth pain, not any foot or gouty arthritic pain--THIS pain, this permanent (since 10-3-14) fire blazing in my right arm, sucks. It's 67% in my shoulder, and 33% in my elbow. It is unfair. It is supposedly also arthritis, just of a slightly different type. Any normal person would just sit and moan (at pain level 7), or sit and cry about it (at pain level 7+), and/or start writing a suicide note (at pain level 8 or higher). 9-1-15 Tuesday morning, after staying up all night, sort of, I tried to get seen by my dentist about my left jaw/face pain; but since I have no bleeding or puss--no REAL emergency, I will have to wait for my regular appointment on 9-8-15. And I understand. (The burning pain level in my right arm is 7+; a "7+" means that a normal person would be crying.) It turns out that grinding my teeth, in stress, does not help my left jaw pain. Actually; grinding my teeth (a coping mechanism) from pain stress (of the jaw) seems to make the jaw pain much worse. Go figure. However; my passport application is going really well, and I got the pictures for it today. Perhaps we will someday use the stupid $200 Belknap Springs gift certificate that Dad sent me later--we have a year to do so (no need to throw a fit about it now). Either way, Dad will be straightened out on our next phone call. And; I control the Sunday poker table; so it's time to kick a few people off of it. Period. That's my internal stress stuff, which has little to do with my (external stress) body pain, or does it? I spent less than an hour today between the exercise ball and foam roller. Down for a nap at 1 pm, and up at 5 pm. I would leave for a little while on Tuesday night; to the Fred Meyer deli, and back home to watch tv. More sleep at 9 pm, to wake at 1 am, hurting. Exercise ball, foam roller, and more tv. This fairy tale is fun! Did piggies at 5 am, then drugged myself back to sleep at 7 am...Up at 10:30 am Wednesday 9-2-15 to make another colonoscopy appointment. Fun with fists. Also; like any good 50 yr. old who is about to start collecting disability, I joined AARP in the first week of September 2015. Later Wednesday afternoon; in between right shoulder + elbow pain (8 today, boo), lower middle back pain (6), and left face pain--I would make a passport appointment. Wow. My disability cannot come quickly enough. Seriously. What the fuck have I been thinking for the past year while I have NOT been getting disability? I hope it can be retro-active, too. Oh; and I wasn't totally sure yesterday, but I have defintely killed my neighbor's plant; so he's going to probably kill me (split the infinitve, you pain nazi). Oh well; don't trust me with plants, or pets. This is some of the worst burning yet in my arm. I went to the garden Wednesday; but not until after exercise balling and foam rolling for an hour--it takes me a while sometimes (right arm pain level STILL AT 8). And, because of this pain, I cannot do dinner/companionship tonight; I can barely stand up. Sorry, but it's nap time for me and my body/mouth pain. The "Sorry" is to my incredibly tolerant girlfriend--zzz. Yes; 2 hours of sleep, and I'm up. Then...I won 9-2 Pinball Knights of Andy's Format; probably because I ate 2 pain pills at 7:30. Woo; I am not only a fucking genius, but also I am a pretty smart guy, too! Smart people know when to eat pain pills, and I'd like to be smart everyday! My watch jumped ahead 95 minutes; which, um, is perfectly normal, right? Then I came home after midnight, or maybe 1:35 am (who knows?). I'd stay up till only 7 or 8 am Thursday, because the pain pills wore off (back to pain level 7+), and I'm not totally fucked up in the brain or anything. No. Then I slept Thursday from around 9 am to 2pm. Almost 5 straight hours is very good. Then I'm on the foam roller again on Thursday 9-3-15 (pain level 7+); I may act like it's annoying, but I don't know how I lived without a foam roller until 9-2015--I need to call them and thank them. I hid in my room until 5 pm Thursday with this pain level of 7+; physical therapy at 5:40 pm. I finally told Dr. Amber that I had a crush on her (awww), but she was not impressed (shocking). Oh well. At least I am no longer living that secret weight on my burning shoulders; and she's one more woman I cannot service anyway (even if she begged me to). I got groceries, then came home to drink heavily (shocking, again). Watching my 5 new hours of Bill Hicks at night (The Essential Bill Hicks) is pretty cool; I might be a slight fan of his.

Laughter; I want to make sure everybody knows this, "LAUGHTER" is the ONLY thing that makes me forget about the pain for a few seconds.

I also ate lots of weed candy and cleaned most of the kitchen. Only stayed up until 4 am-ish Thursday night--I went to bed early, bitches. Up every 2 hours to pee, once to cry (right arm pain level 8) then finally up Friday 9-4-15 at 1 pm or so. Does it really matter at this point? I started cooking dinner, and girlfriend came home early. I said 'Let's get Cornbread Cafe with my pinball winnings.' She was all like 'Meh', which is actually pretty enthusiastic for her. It's passion like this that helps me get through these tough pain days! Good dinner, and some slight companionship, too! It's like Christmas on dirty sheets. Almost 2 minutes of Christmas; yes, that came way too early, ha. For almost 2 full minutes I did not have massive arthritis pain, lower back pain, right arm pain, right side pain, or mouth pain. It was pretty nice, too. (So; maybe laughter AND sex cover up the pain for a few minutes.) Then I would finish up the housework, minus Monday's vacuuming. But I cleaned the tub and the rest of the kitchen, because I am thankful for my girlfriend. Then I'd stay up all night and watch LOTS of college football, and more of my Bill Hicks 'Essential' (right arm pain level 7+, way too much to sleep). I laughed; I cried; it's a pretty regular Friday--but this Friday also had some Bill Hicks! Yeah; and I'm still up at 10:30 am Saturday. Fuck it. Slept from 11 am till 4 pm Saturday 9-5-15; immediately up and on to the foam roller, then the exercise ball (right arm pain level 7+). And for the beginning Saturday of college football 2015, Direct TV does not have access to the Oregon football game today. Now; if you want to watch Georgia Southern at West Virginia, well that game is on 9 different channels. Do you think I'm exaggerating? I am not; I counted all NINE channels; what a freaking joke! It's a shame that Direct TV doesn't try any harder than they do; they could so easily be #1. So I called to ask why there was no tv coverage of the currently ranked #7 Oregon Ducks on tv, and neither girl I spoke with had a clue, about anything. The 2nd girl, after I explained my situation of 'no Duck' football, tried to sell me a new Hopper DVR that could record 5 shows at one time. I asked her if it could record today's Oregon football game; you know, the WHOLE reason that I called--the subject I wanted to discuss, and then she got kind of pissy with me. Why? Because I did NOT want to buy a DVR that had nothing to do with my issue? Oh, that's not going to end well for her. Then later, when I asked her about her work in sales, she clarified that SHE was a Tech, and NOT a salesperson. And I said 'Really? Let's go back to the beginning of our long-distance phone relationship here--about 2 minutes ago; did you, or did you NOT, try to sell me a new "Hopper" DVR? That would be; a new DVR that still WON'T do what I want it to. Did you try to sell me a new DVR?' Hello? If she wasn'tpissy before, then she became really pissy now. All of this is on a recording somewhere. Maybe I'll be calling back on Monday to get me some FREE FREAKING DIRECT TV FOR A YEAR! (No; Monday is a holiday) Honestly; I have to wonder WTF SOME people (with jobs) are thinking? I am being (OBVIOUSLY) way too nice to people who are supposed to have customer service and SALES skills--at businesses that I pay my (girlfriend's) hard-earned money to, and these people with those jobs obviously need to be UNemployed for a while here. These idiots must need some tough love. And the stress from these Direct TV phone calls is not helping ANY of my pain level 8. I'm going to be bringing customer service back--one fired Direct TV employee at a time! So now most of my Saturday is shot; I am stressed, so all of my internal AND external stress pain is back. I totally castrated Direct TV on Facebook--that'll teach 'em! Then I would stay up all night Saturday night, again, against my will; because of the back pain--dull in the mid, but sharp in the lower; then there's the right shoulder level 8 BURN and the right elbow ache + throb. And the jaw pain; yes, let's not forget that. Jeez. I recall when my only complaint was about my gout, and the pain was just a slightly swollen right foot. Perhaps; yes, those are now the 'good old days'. Remember that Dr. Pomeranky said she was not surprised that my right side hurt--she was surprised that my left shoulder and elbow did NOT hurt equally or worse!!! Doctors are baffled by my body! So I tried some different pain pills (they suck, they all suck, fake Vicodin "Norco" rules). At least we tried; so when we get hooked on Norco again, and we will; here is my trying different shit. I would not get to sleep until after 9 am Sunday, then 10 am Sunday. So I would sleep (Through the alarm?) until 2:30 pm, and if Cheri had not come and woken me up, I would still be sleeping there now. Maybe. Or dead. I wish. So (at pain level 7) I was only 15 minutes late to poker on 9-6-15 Sunday, after picking up Shannon, and we had 6 people. I came in 2nd, and won $50. No Shane. Good. I won't be taking any more shit from him, anyway. That's more stress I don't need. I took Shannon home, then went to Fred Meyer for some mashed potatos. Yum--I am easily amused. As I stood up from eating, the lower body pain kicked in like crazy. I was going to walk around the store anyway, I just didn't plan on crying and limping around it like a hunchback. Fun! Yay fairy tale! Home to eat pain pills (that is shocking) and watch tv. Lots of exercise ball time, as well. I shouldn't complain, right? Almost 7 am Monday Labor Day 9-7-2015. I can't hold my head up--from exhaustion, but I cannot get all the way to sleep either--because of pain. This frustration, right here--this is the part that I cannot explain to people. 'Oh if you're so tired, you'll just fall asleep. I do it all the time.' Yes; well, we're not talking about you. Are we? No we're not. My tolerance for pain is its own WOW factor--like aliens being here, and laughing. Somehow; most of the pain receptors in my left arm/side have shut down. That makes perfect sense to me (and possibly Dr. Pomeranky). I don't have to explain this crap to anybody. Why can't I sleep? I get so close; I just want to sleep. Oh well. 8 am Monday morning; the mouth pain (left jaw, under the broken tooth) tends to really hurt with early morning sunlight; I guess that my mouth pain is also NOT a morning person (ha). Oh, how I wish that I had a job that I had to get up and go to--NOT! Finally; after 9 am traffic settled down, I just kind of laid down and drifted off. Not really sleep, but not much more than awake either. Whatever. Pretty soon my alarm is going off (why?) at 2 pm Monday Labor Day 9-7-2015. I got up at 3 pm, rolled on the foam roller, pain level 8, then said 'fuck this' and went back to bed. Cheri was kind of impressed by that, too. Finally up at 4; and I had to change my month-old sheets. Maybe that will help me sleep. New blades had to go in my 800.razors razor (2nd set), too. After a tiny bit of companionship, I am house-cleaning. Yes; house-cleaning with my pain level 7--wow! Becky called 3 times, trying to get me to come over. So I did. Then I'm eating a $15 dinner at Izzy's, and shopping at Fred Meyer. Home at 9 pm to a quiet house. I like this. Shhh. I tried to sleep more; from 10 pm till 1 am. But then I quit trying, and was up all night after 1 am--even with a pain level of only 7. That means hours on the foam roller and big exercise ball; it keeps me from complaining so much. My back still hurts, but not as badly. The burn in my right arm also does not hurt as sharply while I am on the roller or ball, either. Up all night Monday night like I was, somehow, I developed a new ringing in both my ears (Like 2004's ear problems?). It's like; the 'icing' on this fairy tale cake. So I was still up at 8:30 am Tuesday 9-8-15, and ready to go have breakfast and hang out with Shannon. We talked sports for 3 hours, and walked around in the sun together. It was great! Well; it was okay--considering that I should get a tooth extracted today (we hope); arm pain level 7, same as my mouth. Then I had to go get ready for my 2 pm dentist appointment. I just hope they can assess my left jaw pain. Their parking lot was completely full; great, so I expected to be there for hours. But no; my name was called within 5 minutes after 2 pm. Thank you. So I get back there, and explain about my pain. The assistant lady was fantastic; she changed everything over from their planned filling of a different tooth to working with me on my current pain--possibly even an immediate extraction (!). (Hey Direct TV; do you see this? This is customer service.) My new Dr. came in, and was super cool. He kept telling me that I 'might feel some pain here', and I 'might feel a little pressure there'; and there I was, HOPING for some massive different pain anyway. I was thankful, and appreciative; also tried to entertain them. It's what I do. Well, it wasn't easy for my new dentist. My tooth disintegrated as he was pulling it out. Yummy tooth crumbs--I LOVE my fairy tale! But he got it out--maybe even most of it. And it was not tons of fun for me either; but I convinced myself that this was going to fix my mouth pain. And then I would get to chew on bloody gauze for over 6 hours. Yum--my own blood. It's what's for dinner! I thanked them as many times as I could (I'm going to fucking write them a thank you note next; thank them for not being like Direct TV, anyway). And I'm off to WalMart, the booze store, and Fred Meyer for ice cream. Then home at 4:30 pm. A vegan milkshake would have been great, but I went to bed instead. And somehow, even with the taste of bloody gauze, I was able to get almost 4 hours of sleep. Up at 10 pm, starving, and apparently still bleeding in the mouth (That's perfectly normal, right?). Fun with a pain level of 7. This fairy tale cake now has bloody icing; I am cool. So we're going to stay up all night again (shocking), and instead of bitching, I want to do a thankful shout out to Advantage Dental for taking such good care of me today. Tiffany; and Dr. Haik, were those their names? Bless you both! See; I can keep THREE pain balls in the air; gout, arthritis, and lower back issues. But when you add that 4th ball (mouth pain), then I become a crybaby. Sorry. I'd like to see somebody else deal with this better than I am. Maybe after Wednesday my mouth won't hurt so much (or BY Friday). It's Midnight Tuesday night. 5 vegan milkshakes for my sore mouth before 9 am; yum. Then to pass out. Up to pee a few times, but not bad sleep from just after 11 am to 4 pm Wednesday 9-9-15. Then up to foam roll, exercise ball, do a few 'neck ups' (about an hour), shower, and get ready for pinball. Without Vicodin, I do not make it out of the house; that is my story. But I made it to pinball, and ran it well. Home at midnight. Tried to sleep, but couldn't (I didn't expect to sleep anyway). So I got up and did morning stuff to make my girlfriend's life a bit easier. Then I would stay up all morning and go shopping, bike to the garden (broke a sweat, oops), cook dinner (with garden tomatoes), and almost take a nap--but no. No sleep for the old guy. So I'm staying up all day, skipping sleep. Okay. I used to do this all the time--just not with a pain level of 7. It is Thursday 9-10-15. Eventually I would make it to Physical Therapy with the Goddess Dr. Amber. A very light day, as I'm still not supposed to break a sweat. After therapy I drove around aimlessly for a bit, then came home to watch my recorded Patriots football game. Cheri went to bad at 8 pm. I stayed up and called my Mom. How did I make it until almost midnight? Wow. Then I passed out big time. Then on Friday 9-11-15, I would wake up and call Mom again, as I did laundry. Eventually I would be forced to take a nap on Friday afternoon with a pain level of 7+, and be asleep when Cheri got home at 4 pm. Dinner, half a Dr. Who, and some companionship. Then I cleaned the tub and kitchen. My back hurts. My right arm really hurts, too. And I just don't fucking care. Fuck it all, man. They are lucky I haven't started killing people yet. So I drank a Mountain Dew, and got tired at 8 pm. Slept till midnight, and now I am up for a bit at 1 am Friday night. TV and internet poker. I am NOT enjoying seeing all of the 9-11 tributes; that's just me. So Saturday morning 9-12-15 would happen eventually. No sleep needed yet, pain level stil at 7+. Some foam-rolling and big balling, nothing too strenuous. I will need to break a good sweat here soon. My face is pretty much healed now, I think. I was able to get out of the house for a couple hours on Saturday. A very hazy shade of being awake; no alcohol, but a couple of pain pills. Home to watch a bit of Saturday afternoon football and eat ice cream; life is tough today. Perhaps I need a nap. Slept from 5 till 10 pm. Very good for me. So I'll be up all night (pain level 7) to play with piggies and go watch early football with Shannon at 9 am! Cool. It was great, and we got stuff done, too...Then I came home, did some foam-rolling and exercise-balling, then back to get Shanon for poker. It sucked. Then I got some groceries, and came home; very tired (pain level still at 7). Bed at 11 pm, maybe. Up at 2 am. Then I would end up being awake all night again. Yay me...So it's Monday morning with some deep low back pain; nice. Foam roll. Exercise ball. Neck-ups. Ow. We debated going back to bed; but decided to ride the bike to the garden to witness that everything has died. Oh well. Sorry I had to take a couple of days off--I have a note from my dentist, AND I'm still on a no-work status, AND I am applying for disability. If your (plant) lives were that fragile, then it was only a matter of time. And now? Now there are considerably less flowers, plants and shit for me to worry about. I killed my neighbor's plant, and I killed our garden plot. Kill 'em all; die like the little bald bitches you are. So then I came back home to get in the car and go shopping (pain at 7+). Then home to prepare dinner, shower, and wait for girlfriend to come home. Great dinner, companionship, and Monday house-cleaning. Then I shopped some Amazon, and now will go watch DVR'd football and sit on the exercise ball. I only made it till 2 am, then came upstairs to crash (a pain level of 7 is workable for me--usually). Up Tuesday 9-15-15 before 11 am. Time on the roller, and exercise ball; it's a daily ritual. I couldn't really get going until 1 pm (continuing this pain level of 7); so I went and tried the Papa's Pizza lunch buffet, which was pretty good. As I got home at 2--girlfriend also had come home early. So that motivated me to do the easier 80% of bathroom cleaning (all but the tub) a day early, and then I showered to go play some pinball. Came home after 8 pm, tired already. And with some tv, I would crash soon after midnight...Up at 5 am Wednesday 9-16-15 to feed piggies, and start stretching, trying to lower the pain level of 7+...Talked to Paul, and my Mom. Now for some errands. My back pain is a general dull ache today, leaning a little to the right, as opposed to the sharp, specific shooting pains I am so familiar with. It's a nice change, as such (ha). How bad does it hurt? I spent some more time on the shower floor, crying (7+, see?). Girlfriend had to work the full day, which sucks for her. But I had dinner and Dr. Who ready for her when she got home, and that was nice. Then, rather than cry in front of her, I passed out for an hour (no companionship), and I'm up to eat pain pills and go run Pinball Knights. 2nd place, and then I'm home at 1 am. Passed out by 3 am, and up on TH 9-17-15 at 11 am with the regular level 7 (oh, good). My computer is being difficult. Fuck technology, man. And I'm hungry. Never mind all the back issues, and time spent stretching and rolling around on the floor while trying not to cry. P/T at 3:40 pm today. P/T was a disaster; my paperwork does not show enough improvement for them. Well; life's a bitch. Do they know I'm applying for disability? I can only do so much physically, and I'm not hiding it anymore. Fuck this; I should be walking with a cane--but the cane would hurt my right arm even more. So after therapy, I came home to change clothes. Then I ate some pain pills, stopped by Becky's to pick up some money, and headed to Level Up for some new KISS pinball! Later would be a Fred Meyer deli dinner, then home to watch tv and crash by 2 am...Up at 9 am, 9-18-15 sort of. Pain level AT LEAST 7+; which means LOTS of straining and grunting; gee imagine! But I eventually got on my bike and went to the garden; woo. Now I'm organizing and getting ready for dinner with my girl! Dinner, Dr. Who, no companionship with a pain level of 7, and then I was off to the Fred Meyer deli for 2nd dinner. Decided to just come home after 9, no pinball, and I watched some tv. My body started trying to get sick Friday night, which sucks, but I fought it. Ended up staying downstairs, drifting in and out of almost sleep till 3 am...Saturday 9-19-15 I woke up early, 8 am-ish, but didn't get out of bed until almost noon. Feeling sick, but also trying to be funny for my girlfriend. Perhaps I was both. Sore throat, cloudy head, oh this is fun. Whatever; I'm still going to the damn pinball tournament. And I did. No food for hours--probably not a good idea; oh well. 2nd place for me; highest Eugene finisher, again. Then I came home to finally eat some rice, and pass out at 9 pm. Slept on and off in between pee breaks until 6 am Sunday 9-20-15, which LOOKS like a buttload of sleep, yes, but was it really? No. So I'm up Sunday, pain level of 7+ and getting ready to go have some breakfast and early football with Shannon. But with this pain, before any type of staircase negotiation we had to do some extra stretching and popping. This lower back point a little to the right is acting up again. So we have to nurse it a bit. Thank goodness I have the time to do so; still at 7+. And we did lots of short movements; started the day with the red band stretches first thing. I recorded Bills/Pats on my Direct TV channel; cool. 3 hours with Shannon, and then I'm home to shower, then go back and pick him up for poker. Poker went until after 6 pm. Then I'm driving around, talking myself out of playing pinball. Home to watch many hours of bad cable movies + football. Bed before 5 am; kinda wish I had an exercise bike to pedal in front of the tv; I need more. Laid in bed for hours, trying to not think about my back; oh this fairy tale! Up at 11 am Monday. Well; not "up", but awake, with a right arm pain level of 7+ again. It's hard to do any move to upright at all. It took a few minutes of rolling and grinding to get going in a fully upright position. I'm still standing; well, hunching over. I was going to ride my bike to the garden, but not now. It's like I have a little of both back pains; the stabs into the general lower back, and the new lingering post-pain that drifts to the right. I could write a book on back pain, too; maybe I will. So Monday's plan for exercise, gardening, laundry, and saving the world fell out completely. I will only be leaving the apartment for 2 small errands. Then home to limp around, and make some good dinner, with hazelnuts. Dr. Who was quite enjoyable, at least. Then I would get on my Monday night housework. Pain level of 7+; how the fuck do I keep living like this? Managed to clean without crying, and that's always good. Bed by 3 am, to stare at the ceiling for a few hours--I love my life (in the words of my Mom). Up Tuesday 9-22-15 at 10 am. Hey look at me! At least I can walk--so that means laundry today! Just a pain level of 7? That's workable! I also had my passport meeting at 2 pm. Then I went and checked out some elliptical exercisers (ehhh), and I'm off to Blairally for pinball. All of a sudden it's 9 pm, and I'm driving around. Closed down Fred Meyer at 11 pm (peed myself there, fun like a fairy tale), then I'm home to watch some tv, stretch, and crash before 1 am. Slept about 3 hours total (woo hoo), and was up at 5 am to feed piggies on 9-23-15 Wednesday. Foam roller, exercise ball, coffee. In between the bursts of pain, I like this retired life. I went and hung out with Shannon at 10 am for 4.25 hours, then came home to take a nap--getting ready for Pinball Wednesday. I missed time with Cheri, but she doesn't mind letting me sleep, ever. So pinball, then I'm home at 1 am, and passed out soon after...Up with NO alarm at 10:30 am TH 9-24-15. It's my day off, with a pain level of only 7! I'm cleaning bathrooms, cooking, talking to my Mom, and maybe biking to the garden? Yes; after we stretched, foam-rolled, and crawled up and down the steps a few times, we biked out and got more tomatoes. Then I'm getting out of here to give Static Girl some alone time. I'm checking out a new dispensary downtown, eating some Sandwich League, hitting Emerald Vapors for a new charger, and playing theraputic pinball in 2 bars (Medieval Madness may be the most theraputic pinball machine for me right now). All of a sudden it's 9:30 pm, and time to head back to the neighborhood. Slowly walking for groceries at Fred Meyer, and then home to make great vegan burritos. Stretching out in the chair, and on the ball--wishing I had an elliptical trainer. Maybe someday. The pain level of 7 is somewhat stable tonight; I'm getting used to the dull, constant ache in the back--the burning arm is just total shit. Getting tired now, 2 am, and there's a big day tomorrow. So I tried to sleep, but wound up coughing/almost puking for about 4 hours. Eventually I coughed up part of a serrano pepper--so maybe it was in my windpipe? Ouch. Whatever; sleep is over-rated. I got maybe an hour of sleep before 8 am 9-25-15 Friday; then I was up taking a long shower to try to drop the pain level of 8 (no luck), and getting ready to head over to Shannon's. I am in immense pain (still an 8), pissy, and very tired. But things got a bit better. Shannon and I did much good; walking, stretching, and house chores. 3.5 hours. Home to change before physcial therapy. P/T was spent on an elliptical and stair-stepper at Courtsports--very good. And smart. Thanks Dr. Amber. Then home to, unfortunately, pass out (no time w/girlfriend). Naps are good. Up at 9 pm for some tv and nuked potatoes (pain level dropped to 7+). Still wishing I had some machine to exercise on while watching tv; oh well. Crashed again at 2 am; staring at the ceiling for hours. In and out of sleep, waking up often with shooting lower back pains, until noon Saturday; although 'sleeping till noon Saturday' sounds great and lazy--I wish it were just exactly like that. So I'm up, and cleaning stuff (pain level 7). May bike to the garden later. Did that. Finished Friday cleaning, too. Then I put on clothes (boo) and went to play pinball and watch Ducks lose football at Blairally. Home at 10 pm to make another burrito. Now 1 am, and we need sleep. Rolling on the roller and floor--trying to not cry. Ah, this fairy tale...Up 9-27-15 Sunday at 8 am--no alarm. Walked to the PO Box with girflriend, and I was hilarious, as always (pain level 7). Getting ready for a short visit with Shannon, and poker at 3 pm. Short visit and breakfast w/Shannon, yes. But no poker game, and nobody from the bar bothered to call me about it. So; Shannon + Helen, and Shannon's 2 daughters Karen and Linda went to the Blind Pig tavern for a bit (I followed). Shannon was up $200 on a video poker machine. I killed their Sopranos pinball, then came home with tiny pumpkins for my girl. Stayed home, and apparently forgot to eat anything else on Sunday. By 9 pm I was almost dead. So I ate everything, which is always a good idea (no it's not). Heartburn, stomach cramps, chills; why can't I just die and be done with it? All of this extra stomach fun, along with the 7+ right arm pain level, makes for a never-ending cycle of not sleeping, while we get up to pee every 2 hours. Ah, the fairy tale...Up Monday 9-28-15 at noon-ish; groggy as hell, which is weird enough. Onto the foam roller, and exercise ball (right arm pain level 7). I cooked, biked to the garden, did recycling, and got ready for girlfriend and Dr. Who. Then we tried to have companionship, where I was even more disappointing than usual; even my ED is disappointing. Great. Then I did some Monday housework, and watched some tv. My body pain got much worse, along with the level 7 arm pain; so I posted a terrible thing on Facebook. Then the arm pain got worse, too, so I ate pain pills at 11 pm. Dumb idea; they wore off by 2 am, and I couldn't sleep. So I was up till 5 am; did piggie breakfast, and tried to crash at 6 am...Up at 1 pm Tuesday 9-29-15. Arm pain level 7+, and I am hurting. There are not many options to work with here. I mean; I could eat 8 HUGE ribs and a tub of slow-churned ice cream, but would that help (not really)? Actually; the stuffed stomach dropped my pain level to a workable 7. That's nice. And I played some good pinball at Blairally. Home to attempt to crash at 2 am, but we just laid there and whimpered. Ah; MY fairy tale. Somehow by 11 am Wednesday 9-30-15 I was up, pain level at just 7, and I kicked ass! Changed sheets to flannels, did 2 loads of laundry, cooked, cleaned bathrooms, and was ready for a dinner date w/my girl. Dinner, and Castle on tv were fine, but then we had more of the big disappointment! Yay! Well; just being on the flannel sheets with my girl was nice, anyway. And, wtf, because of the extra time from NOT companionshipping, I went ahead and cleaned the tub! Yay me, and my superior room-mate skills. So I'm off with pain pills to run Pinball Knights. 18 people? Fuck me. But I came in 2nd. Yay. I HATE it when the pain pills wear off; I eat them at 7:30 pm, and by 11 pm I am not so happy anymore. So I got home after 1 am, with my post-pain pill pain level of 7+, and I just went to bed and cried. No computer. No food. No bong hits. Nothing. Fuck it. I'm done. How the fuck do I keep doing this everyday? I know WHY I keep going through the daily motions--I do that for Cheri. But my question is; "How"? What kind of electric dark-light surge is moving through earth's magnetic fields that fuels me and NEEDS me to keep waking up everyday? And can somebody please turn it off? How hard can it be? Well; October is coming. There will be some big changes to my world here in 10 of '15. Disability hearings, passports, moneys coming. God only knows what else. Well; September 2015 was fun, but now it's done. Buh-bye.

Pinball and Golden Tee stuff: 9-2-15 Pinball Knights (Andy S.'s format--all games available); 12 people; I beat Tom in the finals for the 2nd week in a row, woo ($35)...9-9-15 Pinball Knights (Clark's format); 11 people, I came in 3rd (So; Clark won Andy's format, and Andy won Clark's format? Okay.)...9-15-15 Tuesday pinball at Blairally; I had two 2.8 bil games of Dr. Who pinball, and one game of 3-lap Pole Position of 52,550 at 1:66:67 (best this year at Blairally)...9-16-15 Pinball Knights; 14 people, everybody gets to pick 1 game, and I came in 2nd ($23)...9-17-15 TH pinball at Level Up while watching the Broncos/Chiefs game; (first time ever playing it, on my 5th game) I got 107 million on the brand new KISS machine (GC is 120), and my 1st game of Medieval Madness was 90 million, then my 2nd game of MM was 72 million. How are YOU doing at pinball lately?..9-19-15 POP Fundraiser at Blairally; 13 people (not as many as my Wednesday tournament this week), and I came in 2nd. 1st and 3rd were 2 cool guys from Portland, so I did better than anyone else from Eugene today...9-23-15 Pinball Knights (hybrid of Andy S.'s format); 16 people, every machine in the bar available, and I came in 3rd. Why is Tom keeping my Pinball Knights prizes in his truck?..9-30-15 Pinball Knights (all "odd" pinball machines; next week might be "evens"); 18 people (!), no house computer--but we used Sam's for a bit, and I came in 2nd ($30) to Andy S. ($50).

Poker stuff: 9-6-15 Shannon's Sunday Poker (Did I throw a small fit, or was it a complete meltdown? Did I scream and slap people? Why or why not?): No fit--Shane didn't show. 6 people (2 newbies; Jerry and Linda--cool as shit), and I won $50 for 2nd, to Rob's $100...Zynga Poker on Facebook: I have been waiting PATIENTLY to achieve 20,000 wins at Texas Hold 'Em. It finally happened in 9-15. I have won 20,043 hands of 57,971 hands played, for a current winning percentage of 34.574% (not bad at all). And I have over $16 million in fake poker money, woo...9-13-15 Shannon's Sunday Poker (And first NFL Sunday; I was over at Shannon's house for breakfast at 9 am, and early football games at 10 am!); 10 people, 2 tables, Shannon + I fell apart. Shane showed, and was all nicey-nice...9-20-15 Shannon's Sunday Poker; 9 people, and I bubbled out in 3rd...9-27-13 Shannon's Sunday Poker didn't happen because of some celebration of life thing for some employee's parent. They could have called to tell me, but no. Their loss.

Grammar: "Food That Power Your Brain" is the FIRST news story on the front page of Yahoo on 9-8-15. You think I am exaggerating? Maybe I'm making this up? Fuck you; here's the link (Can you read the link?): http://news.yahoo.com/food-that-power-your-brain-184753008.html ALL they need is one little "s". They even have TWO choices as to where they can put the "s"; after 'food' or 'power'. Thank you, Yahoo, for making errors that are so obvious...

New foods this month: I made a rice pot that included hazelnuts, and it was pretty good...I made a base of veggies, crumbles and dark kidney beans that makes very good burritos; I am cool...

This month of Blues Jamming: Ha! Remember when Al and Fuch's tag-teamed to try and pull my pants down on 8-20-15's Blues Jam? That's pre-meditated assault on a paying and tipping 8-year customer; me, a 50 yr. old man with established and understood back problems. Wow. I sure hope all of that looks good on unemployed bartender's resumes. Oh; and I am DONE writing notes to Susie Mac about how her employees target me; she doesn't believe me anyway. No; it's time for my own personal deliverance. And this is not my idea. Sorry...Yeah; continuing, I'm going to have to go back and tell Zane what happened; and tell the musicians that it's not their fault, and not my fault, and not my choice, to stop coming to Blues Jam. But I simply cannot be physically abused by any other people in that bar. I have suffered more than enough already. And life goes on...

My trials and trib.s as a critical believer in the concept of God: God is happy that football season started.

What's different here than in college town: Eugene has, officially, 160K people...

What's different here than dumbass Arizona: Who the fuck cares? I don't even know anybody in AZ anymore (Seriously; I don't know any customers, pinballers, hookers, or strippers. Why are we still doing this?)...

What is so cool about Oregon? Randy Cramer is cool about Oregon (I spoke of him above)...In Salem, Marion County Judge Vance Day is so "concerned" about having to perform gay marriages that he is NO LONGER GOING TO PERFORM WEDDING CEREMONIES FOR ANYBODY! As if to say 'Gays want to get married? No. How about; NOBODY gets married under my watch now. Ha!' I don't agree with the guy, but good for him! He is choosing to "eliminate' marriage, rather than to 'discriminate' marriage. And I bet he's NOT on his 4th marriage, like that dumbass Kentucky County Clerk Kim Davis is. 'If gays are getting married, then nobody's getting married!' I fucking LOVE this guy!..June, July and August 2015 were the three hottest ever recorded in Oregon...

Yes, Oregon's cool and all. Isn't weed also legal? It sure is, and I'm hardly taking advantage of it...

How Does Your Garden Grow? (Tales from our community garden plot): Didn't I kill everything there?

Life with Static Girl: The only thing hotter than my girlfriend wearing shorts is--my girlfriend wearing her baggie sweat pants. Yum. I LOVE the slightly colder weather...My girlfriend said that I had set my new tv 'way too dark' for her to watch. Shit. Oh; I will show her dark. I'll set that screen to be permanent charcoal depression; dismal nocturnal emissions, darker than Jared Fogle's browser history. My whole world is deep gray. Trent Reznor is worried about me, for fuck's sake. Come to think of it, my new computer monitor is pretty bleak, too. I'm like a commercial for bad-vision porn over here; put on your magnifying glasses and guilty-squint at these middle-schoolers with me...I say "Thank you." to her. And she says "Pffff. Thank YOU." back to me...She left me a note that said 'I'm sorry I had a bad headache when I got home.' I wrote back to her 'My whole life was a headache before you came along...

My FCP has this for me: We're trading boxes, maybe. I sent her (and her man) a small package of Eugene stuff...

Comments From The Peanut Gallery: New monkey/humans were discovered in Africa; so what?..Fox News bought National Geographic--which I find hilarious...Volkswagen didn't just lie about passing emissions testing, they created a computer app that over-rode facts with false information in their car's emissions testing. Volkswagen chief executive Martin Winterkorn resigns (well, duh)...Stewart Parnell, 61, of Albany GA, who once oversaw Peanut Corporation of America, was sentenced to 28 years in jail for knowingly shipping off salmonella-tainted food (yeah, for 7 years--my Mom had a bottle of bad peanut butter)...5.6 million fingerprints stolen from Feds in hack..."How Americans subsidize big corporations that are then allowed to keep profits offshore and avoid paying taxes"-- http://investmentwatchblog.com/how-americans-subsidize-big-corporations-that-are-then-allowed-to-keep-profits-offshore-and-avoid-paying-taxes/..."Taxpayers are paying $60 for every pot plant the DEA destroys in Oregon"--http://refreshingnews99.blogspot.in/2015/09/taxpayers-are-paying-60-for-every-pot.html ...HP is cutting 30K American jobs...Whole Foods is cutting 1500 jbs...Pharmaceutical company Turing increased the price of a drug called Daraprim (treats AIDS) from $13.50 to $750 a pill and its CEO, Martin Shkreli is being humiliated in social media. (For what? That is American business right there.)

A thought to take with you: Tom Brady was not taken until the end of round 6, pick #199, in the 2000 NFL draft, by the New England Patriots...

"Without Vicodin, I do not make it out of the house; that is my story." and "In between the bursts of pain, I like this retired life."--W. C. Davis (me)

After a jockey fell off of a horse in a race and died, but the horse continued the race--and won, Dan LeBatard said "Yes. The horse is still running; he's just being whipped less!"

Oregon Bumper Stickers: "Earth First. We'll destroy the other planets later"...The bumper sticker I want to make says something like 'Stay in Drugs, Eat Your School, Don't Do Vegetables'. Yup; that's totally me...

Band names: REAL Oregon bands: "VCR" and "Free Beard"; (from last month's Sidebar) "Finger Zit"; (new this month) Bloody Icing, Vegan Milkshake,





SIDEBAR 209


November 2015


(...last month we were...)


Reading: I have read, and now seen, that new Star Wars movies are coming out. Great; like, 38 years ago.

Watching: whatever.

Class Projects: An episode of CSI Cyber (decent show) had a person who died, but somehow their social media pages kept being updated (Kind of sick, right?). Well; somebody else saw this episode, and has created an app that will do that for real people after they die (now that's sick)...

movies together: never again, I'm guessing

Shit I watch alone: from last month, "Grinder" on Fox was okay...Penn and Teller's Bullshit seemed to prove that recycling is bullshit; okay...Madam Secretary is okay.

Comedians: Jay Mohr "Happy. And. A Lot."...Saturday night Comedy Central Half Hour's of Beth Stelling, Randy Lietdke...then...Sam Morril, Joe List...

Crappy cable movies: "The Atticus Institute" was good, "Why We Laugh; Funny Women", "No Tell Motel" (crap),

Play it Again's: "Point Break", "12 Monkeys", "The Social Network",

Watching and Hearing: Lindsey Stirling music/video was on a great ESPN promo (I showed it to Cheri)!..

Now with faster than dial-up internet; Youtubing: all the regulars

Hearing: new were-Jaguar CD!

New on the radio; what radio?

Musical Purchases this month from the Tom Tucker discount wall at Skip's Records And CDWorld; my future place of employment, and permanent Barbie Dream Home: no

Out and About: I LOVE going to Walmart during 3rd shift! They turn the music service over to Alternative, and/or sometimes to a channel that is instrumentals of pop songs. And there I heard a bunch of violinstrumentals that sounded like Lindsey Stirling, and then a couple of days later, Lindsey was on ESPN...

Singing: "Everything's Magic"--Angels + Airwaves, "Down In It" + "That's What I Get"--NIN, "Highway 90"--Jane Jensen, "Fire Lake"--Bob Seger, "Higher"--Creed, "Pretty Fly"-- Offspring, "Pencil Thin Mustache" and "West Nashville Grand Ballroom Gown"--Jimmy Buffet, Love U More"--Sunscreem, "Hey Let Go"--Caviar, "You Never Even Called Me By My Name"--David Allen Coe,

What I want today: A resolution for my stress, and some funds for my suffering...

New stuff this month or so: 10-7-15 NHL Hockey begins, finally!..10-9-15 got my new battery from Lance at Battery X-Change...10-12-15 Dr. visit; 210 lbs., and a flu shot...

This Month of bargain-shopping (Dollar Tree, Cash King, Big Lots, etc.): baby Coke glasses

Occupational Hazards: My first disability phone interview was 10-13-15...

Personal shit for my own memory banks this month (My Journal): 10-1-15 Thursday started with crusty eyes, from crying ourself to sleep early this morning. I remember not being able to stay upright last night; bad. I didn't want any relief either; no drugs, food, or computer. That's not good--that's far too close to the edge. I'll need to try harder to avoid that. So I foam-rolled, exercise balled, and determined a pain level of 7+. Even after a cup of coffee. Shit. And I was up before noon; that's productive, right? THEN I remembered that I was supposed to go see Shannon at 11 am. So I was only an hour late. All the news today is the Roseburg Massacre. Hung with Shannon for 4 hours, then bought some weed candy and came home to try and make sense out of my place in the world. I'm still nowhere even close. I decided to stay in tonight, because I feel too unstable; mentally, physically, everythingly. And the DVR keeps freezing up; making football hard to watch. After midnight, I thought that sleep would come. It never did. I ended up coughing all night, then puking in 4 rooms, ending with a complete festival in the tub at 8 am. Oh, the fairy tale fun. Then I would finally get some sleep around 10 am, till 2 pm Friday...
Up at 2:40 pm Friday 10-2-15 to weird stomach cramps--possibly from puking so much. The right arm pain level may only be a 6 today, what with all of the other body complications; nice. Foam roll, exercise ball, tears; all the regular help. My fragile computer has gone on the fritz again (after the keyboard cord got tangled), hopefully Cheri can fix it. She can--she's smart. I will cook, and be ready for dinner with her tonight. Yay me. Well, pretty much. Dinner was good, and then we went through the motions of companionship; eh. Then she's ignoring me, and I'm trying to write jokes about how my body is deteriorating. I'm eating pot cookies, and changing out vape tanks--anything to distract me from how bad the pain is getting. I would give up and go to bed around 1 am; staring at the ceiling is so much fun. Somehow; after 4 trips to pee, I would get a few hours of sleep--3+, I think.
And all of a sudden it's 10 am Saturday morning, 10-3-15. Football everywhere, but girlfriend wants to go garden. First, with arm pain at 6+, it's foam roll, exercise ball, and hardly any tears today! So we gardened, and planted garlic. Picked up Cornbread Cafe on the way home. Watched an old Dr. Who, and now it's 3 pm. Right arm pain level is still at 6+, which sucks (for anybody with normal pain tolerance), but I can live with it. I left for a bit to go run some errands. Home to watch some Saturday night football, and stay up way too late moaning and aching. Finally got some sleep, after coughing most of the night again, and
was up at 11 am 10-4-15 Sunday. Pain level a happily surprising 6, which is very workable. In fact, I was pushing for the Sunday walk to the PO box; wow. Normally I cry when I just think about that walk--but not today. So we walked. And soon it will be an NFL Sunday, maybe even with poker! Yes poker. Picked up Shannon, and we had a full table of 8. After poker, I took Shannon home; but poor Helen is sick. So I hung with Shannon for a bit; made him some dinner, and we watched some football. When I left, too late (dark) to water the garden, so I went back to Blairally. No Game Show at the arcade--Game Show is at Comic-Fest. An empty-ish bar with...wait for it...Jurassic park pinball. No way. Yes. My 6th favorite pinball machine of all time--the pinball machine I compared to my girlfriend back in 2003; THAT one. On my first game back, 603 million, I was giving a clinic to Chad and Gavin; it was pretty sweet. Chad wants me to run MANY pinball tournaments. I can't agree to all of that yet, but it's nice to be offered. So Sunday night I came home after 11 pm. Girlfriend is getting sick, and I am staying up all night watching a frozen DVR on tv. Nice...
So Monday morning 10-5-15 happened at noonish. Right arm pain level 7, but we can't worry about that while girlfriend is dying. Foam roll, exercise ball. Eventually I would get out of the house, go mail shit, get my car battery checked, groceries, and do my outdoor comedy presentation while watering Garlic Lake at the garden plot--I am hilarious. I stand there and talk about how much exercise I'm getting, and how cool my gray chest hair is, and how the ED makes my life so much simpler now--I don't have to worry about my dick anymore. Woo. I named the garlic patch "Garlic Lake" (duh). Then I would come home and decide to stay in tonight; I will go kill Jurassic Park pinball more tomorrow. Maybe. A surprisingly close football game, and the refs missed an easy possession call--glad I don't watch live football anymore. I did some good experimentation with chocolate medibles, because it helps with the overall body pain. I know I'll be up all night coughing, crying, and hurting anyway; so? No need to get all worked up about stupid shit now. Hours of tossing and turning; coughing up stuff all night. With my body pains, heartburn and cloggy phlegm (LOTS of companions)--I never have to (not) sleep alone! I love my fairy tale! Hey; let's stare at the ceiling for a while!
So I got out of bed at 7 am Tuesday, after ZERO sleep, 10-6-15 to feed the piggies, and make sure girlfriend has called in to her work. She appreciates me. Arm pain level is at a 6+; again, I have FAR too much other stuff to worry about right now. Dentist later today, too. Having a little Offspring run here at 8:30 am Tuesday. It should be so much more fun. Right. So then I will get tired and ready to sleep around 10 am (wtf?). Up at 1:50 pm to get ready for the dentist at 2:30 pm. I went dental, and then went shopping. Home, just before crying, to stretch out the body on th eball and roller. Then to make mashed potatos and crumbles for me and my girl, then 2 ice cream smoothies for me. I never got to the garden today; oh well. Talked to dad, and hung up on him. Talked to mom, and that ended okay. Good. Cheri has gone to bed. What will this mouse do now? Arm pain got worse as the evening wore on; I stayed in, and ate pain pills. By midnight, my arm was trembling. So then I tried to trip on pot, and that just wasted time. I couldn't feel any THC--just a burning arm. So I would stare at the ceiling for a few hours; I love my fairy tale. Almost puked, and kept coughing all night. I cough, then Cheri coughs, Then I cough, then Cheri coughs. It's a lung-clearing symphony here.
So Wednesday 10-7-15 happened. I'm out of bed at noon, with arm pain at 7+. Coffee doesn't help. Weed candy doesn't help. Can't sleep. Not hungry. Ate another ice cream smoothie anyway. I need to clean, but can't get motivated. Plus, everything hurts. But I'm still loving my life--so glad to be alive here. Foam roll, and exercise ball; body pain sucks! I tok a nap right at 5 pm, getting ready for pinball. Did pinball. Came home and decided to go to bed. Eventually got some sleep, around dawn, and slept till noon again.
Up TH 10-8-15 to drink coffee, do a load of laundry. Foam roll and exercise ball fun! Arm pain at a regular 7; I can deal. Cheri went to work, wow. And I still can't get motivated. Stretched for a few minutes. Then I took off at 4 pm; to see about a car battery, and to do physical therapy. Dinner at Fred Meyer deli, then I'm home at 7 pm. Girlfriend had already gone to bed, poor thing. Got my passport, and my money order in the mail today. Yay for tiny victories. TH night at home. There is football, and I have to go see Shannon early tomorrow. Unfortunately I can not sleep. Now. Or ever. Never,
So I would get just a tiny nap in before 8 am Friday morning 10-9-15, but I'm up late, with a flaming arm, 7+, no time for a shower, and heading to Shannon's. Wound up working 5.5 hours there, then I went and got my battery from Lance at Batteries X-Change. It was tricky--I made the right call. Home to just try to stay awake, and I did. Girlfriend is still sick, and I'm not much better. We finally watched the cool Dr. Who from last week. No companionship, minimal Friday house clean (and we skipped Mon. + Wed.s, oops). And I would stay up till 3 am somehow. Then I crashed hard. For many, many hours. Slept off and on from 3 am till 1 pm--fuck you world!
Up Sat. 10-10-15 with right arm pain at 6--which is nothing! It's a gloomy day all around, and beautiful! I feel about as good as I ever have (which is not much); sleep is great work--if you can get it! Helen has called; Shannon is in the hospital, and will be for a few days. Bummer. He went in last night--he was having breathing troubles. I would eventually get some motivation on Sat., and go to the grocery and garden. Then I talked to Helen, and went by her place to get her some groceries--she can't drive; I keep telling her that Shannon's doing okay--much better than most people in the Acute Care for Elders ward (ACE). So I came home and took a nap, then was up semi-late Sat night, NOT watching any Ducks football, and I was not concerned about it.
Sunday morning 10-11-15, with a right arm pain level of 7, I walked with Cheri to the PO Box, did some qucik exercise on the ball, and then went to hang out with Shannon until 2 pm. Came home to shower, then go play poker. Then came home to watch late football. Oh! And I learned how bad my eyesight is by not being able to read the garden lock numbers at dusk; I had to climb over the fence and go ask somebody for a flashlight! When I got home I was sad and in major pain Sunday night--go figure! Stared at the ceiling for many hours, cried for a bit, and maybe got some sleep. Cool. It's a fairy tale here.
Up Monday 10-12-15 at 11 am. Coffee really helps the arm pain of 7. Foam roll, exercise ball, and tears. I mailed a package to Wisconsin, and went to my Dr's appointment at 2:30. He may help me to get my medical marijuana card renewed this year (he was no help last year), and he increased my meds, and gave me a copy of my distressed MRI for my disability meeting on Tuesday. Wow. Thanks doc! Maybe the world is not completely incompetent. Then I swung by the hospital to see Shannon's new bigger room, and the plan is for him to go home on Tuesday (tomorrow)! Most people just stay there and die, but not my buddy Shannon! That makes me very happy, and Helen too! So I came home with hope to do dinner/Dr. Who/companionship with my girl. Cheri was even willing--though still sick, but there would be no companionship--because I passed out. Great. Then I was up at 9 pm Monday night to eat all of the broccoli in the house (you could do worse). I had recorded the Steelers/Chargers football game, and it was a really good one. After it, I had the urge to watch the movie "12 Monkeys". Then I would stay up till 5 am (but not by choice) and feed the piggies breakfast. Scattered sleep and ceiling staring; fairy tale standard operating procedure (SOP) here.
Alarms go off at 11 am Tuesday 10-13-15 (Happy Birthday FCP!). Arm pain is heavy, a definite 7 today. Getting ready for my disability phone interview around 1 pm today. Then I'm off to fill prescriptions and get groceries. Shannon should come home today! My plan was to go see Shannon, but I really felt like crap. And I also did not feel like going to the 'Bells and Chimes' all-female pinball tournament at Blairally, again. Oh well. So I wound up staying in and being boring Tuesday night; hey, sometimes my pain doesn't like other people; ever. So after I called Dad and hung up on him, then I called Mom and talked to her for a bit. Later in the evening, and possibly inspired by Trent Reznor soundtracks, I had to watch "The Social Network" again. So I was up to feed piggies breakfast at 5 am, and then I passed out at dawn.
Up at noon-ish Wednesday with a total BURN on the right arm; I must have slept ON my right shoulder somehow, and I was bad off. Pain level 8, definitely, maybe even 8+. I couldn't focus well--no human could live like this. Exerise ball, foam roll, and many tears. All of a sudden I had to get out of the house and go run errands, but I didn't have all the stuff I needed to get those things done, so I wound up even more upset. Physical pain caused mental impairment, which led to more anxiety and frustration. I wanted to kill everybody; nuke the planet, dissolve this stupid Earth-rock. Fuck this. I am not built for this, and I don't need this. I feel very SORRY for the world if I have another day like this, EVER! Came home, crying, and just started cleaning stuff (which is what I should have done all along). At least that did make me feel a tiny bit better; good. Then we had some good dinner/Castle/and a tiny bit of companionship. TINY. Yay. I felt so much better that I also cleaned the shower; go me. But I will never forget how I felt earlier today. The world is on warning, you fuckers! Then I was racing out to go run Pinball Knights. Home at 1 am, updating to the new Were-Jaguars CD, and wound up staying up till 5 am again. Fed piggies, and crashed at dawn again.
Up at noon-ish again on Thursday 10-15-15 with a pain level of right at 7, which sucks, but is a picnic compared to yesterday. P/T at 5 pm today. Stretching, rolling, I can no longer do the side crunches (core) with exertion. Bummer. Oh well. So P/T was very light, and then I went to Blairally for some pinball. Saw Colin and Tom, Laaz + Vi. Home after 9 to watch sports. I need to get to sleep quick, we're having breakfast with Shannon tomorrow. But there would be no sleep. I'm eating pills, stretching, and rolling around on the floor--still can't get tired. So I stared at the ceiling for a few hours, and
Cheri 'woke' me at 7 am Friday morning 10-16-15 to get ready. With almost zero sleep, my whole body felt terrible; right arm pain at a solid 7+. I bleached the bathtub, and headed over to Shannon's for 7 hours. Made it home before girlfriend, and we had good dinner/tv together, but then I had to pass out. Slept till 11 pm Friday night, so then I had the whole house to myself until 6 am Saturday (7 hours of ME time). It sure looks like fun--on paper. But along with my arm problems, my lower back also hurt, and there's a new nerve-ish pain on the outside of my right leg, just above th eknee. Squatting, standing up, being on my knees--it's all different and more painful now. And when it started spasm-ing, that's when I got really frustrated. So I did some cleaning (cleaning distracts me), and by midnight I had decided to go medible crazy--it was too late to take a monster oil pill. So I ate 4 heavy doses of chocolate; fuck it, man--let's trip on medibles tonight! (300 mg. of THC in chocolate) I watched lots of tv, almost got sick once, and loaded up some pictures of Pinball Knights on Facebook, played some Zynga poker, and quickly it was 6 am. Totally lost time (not completely tripping, but heavily medicated and NOT so pissy); hours just fly by. Missing time? The body pain is horrible, but the lack of "life" responsibility is good. Fed piggies at 6 am, and finally crashed again around 9 am.
Slept 3 hours till noon-ish Saturday 10-17-15, then I'm up checking sports. Right arm burning-ass fire pain at 7 again, and thank you for that. Then back to sleep for a couple of hours. Up at 4 pm Saturday 10-17-15, and now people on the phone want stuff. So I went to run errands, get groceries, and more medibles! (Brownies this time, and a cookie. Where did all of my pot chocolate go?) The Oregon football game is on at 7 pm, cool! Poor Cheri has gone to bed--she's still sick. The nerve-y pain on the outside of my right leg is down a bit, but still present in every upper torso turn. I have no energy, and I'm all pissed off at life--perhaps I should be thankful that I don't have to deal with hardly any people. But then again, I SET MY LIFE UP TO NOT HAVE TO DEAL WITH HARDLY ANY PEOPLE; IT'S THAT WAY ON PURPOSE. I MADE THIS! Aww, I am so messed up. It's 9 pm Saturday night. Great. Back pain came back very strong, even after some exercise ball time. So I decided to eat a pot brownie, and a cookie, about 400 mgs. of THC total. It was not as intense as Friday night's chocolate, but still enjoybale. I knew I had to get some sleep before my Shannon breakfast Sunday. Getting to sleep is my downfall; it takes hours. I had gotten about an hour before
Cheri woke me up Sunday morning 10-18-15 at 8 am. Off to Shannon's at 9, with a right arm pain of 7. Instead of right leg nerve pain, my entire lower back is aching; fun. I haven't felt this kind of pain in a while; it's like a fairy tale over here. 2.75 hours later I'm home, getting in a pre-poker nap. Poker was terrible, and Helen wasn't even back home yet at 5 pm. But she got back soon after, amidst their family drama with daughters and dogs. To combat back pain, I came home and biked to the garden; Garlic Lake! The intense bike ride may have helped my back. Then I had a dilemma. Decided to drink beer tonight during the Pats/Colts game; very expensive beer; $6 a beer. 'Waking up Monday will be very interesting'--I remember saying that. My experiment to self-induce a beer-drunk for the black-out sleep benefit...wait for it...actually worked! Hunter Thompson would be proud! I slept for almost 6 hours straight--most sleep in months. What a refreshing hangover!
Arm pain is down to 6 here on Monday 10-19-15, and outside right leg nerve-y pain is also lower, like a cramp. The intense lower back pain from yesterday is much less strong; so both the back and right leg are better, I guess. And now everybody wants stuff--so we're out running errands. Home by 4, and we're making dinner. Dr. Who with girlfriend, and then almost sex again (call me Sexual Disappointment, or "Sexy D" for short). She did her fair share (and more); that's for sure! I'm very tired of disappointing her though. Then I left for Walmart. Walking around Walmart, my right leg nerve-y pain started hurting again. I must be really fun to watch while I stagger around and mumble. Some might say that I've just been staggering around and mumbling my whole life. Decided before leaving Walmart that at home I would eat BOTH pain pills, AND the Fudge Bomb chocolate (600 mg THC) tonight. I have a plan. So I watched many more hours of football and such--it's what I do. The Fudge Bomb gives a good base of high, but nothing really screaming. I'd like to combine the fudge bomb with some of the other chocolate highs; maybe another time. And now it's 4 am Monday night. Bed at 6, sleeping pills kicked in...
Tuesday 10-20-15 started at noon without much help. Pain level of 7 in the right arm, and I don't see anybody rushing to kiss my ass, so fuck all of you. How am I going to deal with this shit again today? Foam roll, exercise ball, and tears! I eventually went to Walmart and bought some new Dr. Scholl footmap insoles. Baby steps. Tried for sleep around 2:30 am.
Wednesday 10-21-15 started at 8 am, arm pain level of 7+ (very bad). We foam-rolled, exercise balled, and cried--SOP, baby! With my getting over to see Shannon at 9. Breakfast with him, and 3 hours of tv. Then I came home for a bit--then back to see Shannon at 3:15. Home at 5, and I tried to lay down for an hour. Up for pinball at 7. Then I had to come home and stretch more. Pills to help make sleep by 4 am
TH 10-22-15 I was up by noon. Foam roll, exercise ball, taers. ad to go see Shannon at 1:45; arm pain at 7, right leg hurts too; that nerve-y pain is now like a permanent cramp. Ended up eating dinner over there (sirloins), then home to cry. Foam roll, exercise ball. I ate some pot chocolate, and a cookie (that helped). Tried for many hours to sleep, but just laid there. Up
FR morning 10-23-15 became FR 10 am, P/T at 11 am. Arm pain at 7, I quit crying before I got to physical therapy. Then I came home. GF came home early, we had Cornbread Cafe and disappointing sex. Then I felt weird. Food didn't sit right. Can't sleep. Can't stay awake. Me. Now 8 am Saturday...
Slept from 9 til 2:30 pm SA 10-24-15. Up with arm pain at 6+, so this is a good day. Foam roll, exercise ball, just a few tears. Biked to garden, Garlic Lake is doing great! Now to go to Blairally, and then...groceries, and lots of tv. Opened the big Wisconsin box + wrote a letter while doing it. Not great, but not bad. Awake till 5 am Sat. night...
Up Sunday 10-25-15 after noon, arm pain only at 6, I'm very lucky. Exercise ball, foam roll, no tears today! The walk to the PO Box w/Cheri was very entertaining. Then I went to pick up Shannon for poker. We finished early, and I came home early. Eventually I would drink, smoke, and take lots of pills. This is the fun my life is now--pain avoidance. Ended up staying up all night, and a crying fit at 9 am Monday morning. Woo...
Then up Monday 10-26-15 at 2 pm. Girlfriend is home, so I went back to bed. Then up, with arm pain at 6+ to exercise walk, and then ride my bike to Garlic Lake. Home to do Dr. Who., attempt sex, no, and then house-clean. I am amazing, all things considered. Then the tv went out. I called DirecTv, and they could not help. Then on a fluke I changed the channel to 4, and tv was all good again. What a mess. I would go tobed by 5 am and sdtare at the ceiling some more. This is a lot like Diversion Therapy--especially the crying parts.
Up Tuesday 10-27-15 at noon, with arm pain at 6+ today; I can deal with it. In fact, pain is so deal-with-able that I went crazy productive! I did laundry, walked, and rode my bike to water Garlic Lake. I need more productive days like this! Direct TV sent us a new DVR. I would end up staying up till dawn watching History Channel shows, and feeding the piggies at 5 am. It rained all night; good. Started staring at the ceiling around 7 am again. Oh this is so much fun!
Then I was up at 1 pm Wednesday 10-28-15, with arm pain at 7, almost 7+ again. I had to exrcise ball, foam roll, and cry a little, and it still hurt like shit. It is incredible that I can live as well as I do! But I did. And I walked; yes, with the permanent outer leg cramp! And I cooked. And we watched CSI Cyber, then had disappointing sex. Then I went to run pinball. Stayed up all night again. Slept finally after 10 am till
2 pm TH 10-29-15 my marijuana card expires, more stress, today. Arm pain at 7, but today is full therapy. Also therapy paperwork. Supposedly I am better now? Really? Better than what? Sure I am. Couldn't figure out what I wanted to do, so I came home. Friday will have many phone calls--I know that. So, anxious like that, I ended up staying up all night again--watching things that will be gone when we switch out DVR's. This was AS productive an overnight as I can do, even through the pain. Made some phone calls Friday daytime; Direct TV, OMMP (I will be without a medical marijuana card for a couple of months now--and it's THEIR fault). So I was up until after 3 pm Friday. Then, I crashed hard--which means I missed EVERYTHING with girlfriend; no dinner, no companionship, no whatever.
Woke up at 11:30 pm Friday night 10-30-15; wow. Arm pain is relatively low after all that sleep, about a 6. But it still burns; burns like crazy. I have to foam roll, exercise ball, and cry a little--and this is at night--for a change! This is the fun my life is now. Luckily I have hours of work to do here. 2:30 am on Halloween morning. Oh the fun! I would keep on keeping on, and stay up all night Friday night, then tried to hook up the new DVR on Sat. morning. It wouldn't work at all, so then we're off to
go to Shannon's at 9:30 am Saturday 10-31-15 Halloween. We did breakfast, took a walk, and watched some football. Out of there at 4 pm to go find out that I cannot use my expired medical card (even with 4 years of approval paperwork) ANYWHERE until I get a new card. OMMP really fucked up this one--ALL the rules have changed. Nice! Even with a new $15 HDMI cable the new DVR wil not work, so this shit is ALL Direct TV's fault. The old DVR works fine--it just doesn't record for shit. So it's just a regular Saturday night with really crappy horror movies, except for all of this Halloween bullshit--hey look, we had exactly ONE trick-or-treater. Glad I bought all of that damn vegan candy! Then I started dozing at 8 pm. Boo. A smart woman convinced me to go to bed and sleep through the time change. So I'm up at...

Pinball and Golden Tee stuff: Jurassic Park pinball at Blairally Sunday 10-5-15; first game on it for me was 603 mil...10-7-15 Pinball Knights; 16 people, and I won it ($45)...10-14-15 Pinball Knights; 11 people, and I was 3rd...10-21-15 Pinball Knights; 14 people, and I was 10th...10-28-15 Pinball Knights--MY format; 8 people, and I was 3rd (NEW arcade high score on Jurassic Park is my 1.4 billion, done DURING tonight's tournament)...

Poker stuff: 10-4-15 Shannon's Sunday Poker; 8 people, we earned NOTHING...10-11-15 Poker (no Shannon) 4 people, and I came in last!..10-18-15 Shannon's Sunday Poker; 6 people, Shannon and I tanked...10-25-15 Shannon's Sunday Poker; 5 people, I made $50...

Grammar: From Cracked magazine I got this headline for an e-mail: "6 Insane Reasons Formally Famous People Dropped Off The Map" (not "formerly", but "formally")...

New foods this month: Maybe some vegan chocolate granola, inspired by my FCP! They sent us some great stuff from Wis-CAN-sin.

This month of Blues Jamming: never going back. Fuck them. I sent my FCP a Blues Jam shirt.

My trials and trib.s as a critical believer in the concept of God: God loves football. Or...God hates football less than war; how about that?

What's different here than in college town: General Beauregard's bar in Athens sells a shot called "Niggerita"; that's not offensive at all. And now that bar is shut down...

What's different here than dumbass Arizona: Fuck Arizona. I need to overhaul these damn Sidebars.

What is so cool about Oregon? I was driving behind a North Dakota tagged car with a current sticker of 2003; so I decided to drop back a bit from it...Oregon had 157 days above 70 degrees in 2015; that is a new record!..

Yes, Oregon's cool and all. Isn't weed also legal? Yes: 10-1-15 Weed became legal to sell in stores today. I will be staying with buying weed/weed by-products from medical marijuana dispensaries that cater mainly (or only) to card-holders...As of 10-10-15, Oregon pot sales are over $11 million...The OMMP did not tell any card-holders about anything being different this year with card renewals. So I sent off my paperwork before my card expired on 10-29-15, but now I'll be unable to go make purchases as a medical patient for a couple of months. This does not please me. Can I sue to have 2 months added to my 2015 card?..

How Does Your Garden Grow? (Tales from our community garden plot): We are growing more garlic (that's underground stuff). I am in charge of flooding the garden plot; I call it "Garlic Lake"...10-25-15 Garlic Lake is doing great; taking out some of my high level stress by totally over-watering an underground plant area is going really well.

Life with Static Girl: 10-4-15 she left me a very funny note: "I caught your stupid 'I'm not sick' disease; thank you for sharing." (I've been saying that I'm not sick for days now.)...

My FCP has this for me: She (and her cool man) sent us a big box of neat-o stuff from cheese-land. Wait; I said that already.

Comments From The Peanut Gallery: 10-1-15 was also the day of the Roseburg Massacre (9 dead, 20 hurt?). We are all very upset...15 million T-Mobile customers had their info stolen...The U. S. has spent 10's of billions of dollars to train fighting forces in North Africa, the Mideast, and south Asia--all for nothing...

A thought to take with you: "So who's in charge now? I need to know who to ignore."--Dr. Who

"My records are an investment in the preservation of what's left of my sanity."--Henry Rollins

"Don't cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it."--Facebook quote

Oregon Bumper Stickers: "My Other Ride Is A Tardis"

Band names: Burner Phone, Flushable Wipes, Frozen Clones, Acid Vats (some History Channel horror castle in Chicago?)





SIDEBAR 210

December 2015


(...last month we were...)


Reading: Go read this quick yahoo story about weed in Oregon: http://www.fool.com/investing/general/2015/11/22/3-ways-oregon-is-setting-the-green-standard-for-th.aspx?source=eogyholnk0000001&utm_source=yahoo&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=article...

Watching: 11-4-15 we got our new Direct TV DVR hooked up...

Class Projects: Dr. Who, Castle, CSI Cyber, and not much else. "Breakthrough" once.

movies together: She doesn't have time for movies. However; I heard that Hollywood took "Jem and the Holograms" OUT of theaters because it was doing so poorly. Ha...

Shit I watch alone: Recorded Monday Night Football, and everything else. The Resident Evil marathon on IFC was recorded over Thanksgiving.

Comedians: Jeff Dunham "Unhinged In Hollywood", Heather McDonald "I Don't Mean To Brag", Pete Correale "Let Me Tell Ya", 'Half Hour's' of Sean Donnely and Phil Hanley, 2 more Half Hour's recorded, and part of a Nikki Glaser Half Hour (she gets a show in 2-16 on Comedy Central)...

Crappy cable movies: Holy shit. Hollywood is so desperate for movies that they remade "Red Dawn" in 2012, and nobody even knew about it. (Now THAT'S funny!)...Hollywood also remade the Conan movies? And they remade Land of the Lost? And they remade the Vacation movies; did I mention that already? Fuck. Well; good for them. Just wait for a new branch in the 'Rocky' chain coming, when "Creed" (about Apollo's son) comes to theaters soon..I watched some crappy cable moves, too. Like; "Mindhunters", "Open House", "The Thaw", "Hostage", "Rampart", "20 Feet From Stardom", "Resident Evil",

Play it Again's: Kyle Kinane "I Liked His Old Stuff Better",

Watching and Hearing: Here's one for 'watching and hearing'; at Fred Meyer thay have a wireless stereo speaker that is also a lava lamp...Watching and Hearing? AARP is a sponsor of PTI now...This is supposed to be about tv commercials--good and bad. How about TWO NEW VIDEO GAMES w/tv commercials? Call of Duty (?), and Fallout 4; fuck them... If you had told me in 1981 that the Who's "Eminence Front" would be in the back of a GMC commercial, I would have bet you--and I would have lost!..Some new movie (The Insider) preview has "When The Levee Breaks" in it...

Now with faster than dial-up internet; Youtubing: Lots of Lindsey Stirling,

Hearing: Computer desk CD stack is still the same 13, I guess. "Rattle That Lock"--David Gilmour, "How To Destroy Angels"--NIN,

New on the radio; I really should get radio in my car.

Musical Purchases this month from the Tom Tucker discount wall at Skip's Records And CDWorld; my future place of employment, and permanent Barbie Dream Home: nope.

Out and About: Pandora at Blairally works well...

Singing: "The Final Countdown"--Europe (blame the Geico tv commercial), "Bullet with Butterfly Wings"--Smashing Pumpkins (blame Amazon), "Hell Is Goodbye"--The Downtrodden (RIP Jon Kay), "Highway 90"--Jane Jensen, 'Renegades' Rage ("Maggie's Farm", "Renegades Of Funk", "Housin", "Beautiful World", etc.), "Jane" and "Stranger"--Starship, "Feel Like Making Love"--Bad Company, "I Want To Touch You"--Catherine Wheel, "You Supply The Night"--Toto,

What I want today: some Pinky and the Brain shirt (blame Amazon), this used HP Stream 7 inch Windows tablet at Amazon (along with screen protecters, and a protective case) http://www.amazon.com/dp/B015WSH4VC/ref=wl_it_dp_o_pC_nS_ttl?_encoding=UTF8&colid=28AVCSUY5MUZI&coliid=I129EOZW8XH0BV, but I'mnot buying another computer until arcade compensation kicks in, thank you...I'd also like (later) a personal blender that runs with mason jars and lids (brilliant).

New stuff this month or so: (FIRST TIME EVER: "SINGING", "WHAT I WANT TODAY", and "NEW STUFF THIS MONTH OR SO" are all connected by THIS shirt at Amazon (that I found, by accident, this month): http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0081K6YJM/ref=wl_it_dp_o_pC_nS_ttl?_encoding=UTF8&colid=28AVCSUY5MUZI&coliid=I3IW905QWOWC53...11-20-15, our first night below freezing (29)...160K miles on the new Buick now...3 Mondays in a row that I did not vacuum. Wow...At Fred Meyer, I saw for sale a "Twinkie-Maker", so that people can make their own twinkies at home...

This Month of bargain-shopping (Dollar Tree, Cash King, Big Lots, etc.): 3 more bottles of antacids,

Occupational Hazards: I can no longer pick up/change out the full water jugs at Blairally; oh well.

Personal shit for my own memory banks this month (My Journal): 11-1-15 Sunday starts at 8:30 am, which is really 7:30 am because of the time change. So I slept from roughly 11 pm Sat. until 7 am Sun., or almost 8 hours. That's really good; there is something to be said for staying awake until you are totally exhausted, and then passing out completely--for as long as you can. This makes for my right arm pain to be the LOWEST it has ever been; it's just a regular burning with very infrequent pain tinges--I'd have to call this pain level a 5, which is the lowest it has been this entire year. This kind of low pain level rarely lasts, but getting 6 hours of sleep certainly helps. It might even keep me from killing a few people. I like sleep, and I like low pain. Soon enough, Static Girl and I walked in the rain to her PO Box, which had nothing in it. Our talk was about the "cloud", and how we are about to lose our VHS players (maybe) in the Direct TV DVR transition coming Wednesday at noon. Cheri says we're about to lose our DVD's/players also. I said "Naaaa." Back home to watch some tv; and one show was the Blockbuster/The Shining Southpark (excellent) from last night. Then I cleaned the bathtub, and headed out to pick up Shannon. 10 for poker, and I was 4th. Drove over to see Becky for a minute, then wandered back home at 9 pm. Watching DVR'd stuff that will disappear on Wednesday. Got tired at midnight, so I went to bed. Stared at the ceiling for a few hours, but did get some sleep to wake up
Monday 11-2-15 at 11 am. Arm pain is still a regular 6, with some pulsing throbs. Foam roll and exercise ball. Then I got productive; I cooked, walked, shopped, recycled, and was trying to get our cruise paid for. Too bad our agent was sick today. Mom blames me for every little thing that doesn't go right in her world, so of course this is all my fault. We have 24 hours to make this still stick, and we will. Pretty soon it's 4:30 pm, Cheri comes home, we watched (the first) "Breakthrough" from Sunday night on NGC (about pandemics), that's a really good show! Then we tried for companionship, and I cleaned some house. Watching tons of old DVR shows. Up all night to feed piggies, bed at 6, sleep by 8 am
crash until 2 pm Tuesday 11-3-15. Happy 33 years since I died. Tried to connect the new DVR again Tuesday at noon. No. Called SS about an extension; yes. Then I'm out to run errands. Arm pain is a regular 6 again today, but with more of those hot pulsing throbs. It's like a heartburn flash in my shoulder, on and off, about every 2 seconds. Fun. I got out of here at 4 pm, and went to play pinball at Blairally. Groceries on the way home, and then I would stay up all night again. The pain sometimes gets worse as the night rolls on; so I drink, and eat medibles and pain pills. I might also be getting sick; great. Coughed through the morning in bed; more fun. Up
(first) at 8 am Wednesday 11-4-15 getting ready for the Direct TV people. Arm pain at regular 6 again. They showed up, and didn't have to change anything, and didn't have to go outside and adjust anything. They just punched a few buttons on the remote (which I could have done), and made it all work just fine. I ain't paying no $50 for that shit. They also said they were going to hook up "On Demand", but then did not. They left after about an hour. Back to bed for me.
Up at 2 pm Wednesday, really bad arm pain, a 7+, but I had to make sure dinner was cooked for girlfriend. Then I'm back to bed again (fuck this pain, I will try to sleep); sleep is fleeting and short-lived--thank you body pain (and I don't want to get sick!). Up finally at 7 pm to get ready for Pinball Knights (post Blazers game). Did that, and came home to watch new Direct TV. I'm also drinking, smoking, and eating pain pills; it's what I do. Fed piggies, and crashed by 5 am. Up
Thursday 11-5-15 at noon. The entire right side of my body is hurting; we'll give the arm pain a level 6, and the rest of the right side a 5; thank you. I'm talking to Direct TV, and trying to not scream. P/T at 5 today; maybe I'll scream there. Ended up not going anywhere after P/T, and came home to watch tv. Stayed up all night, watching lots of my Bill Hicks videos, to make phone calls early Friday, then accidentally stayed up and puked right before noon. Girlfriend came home early, and I still couldn't get up. So I was finally up at
7 pm Friday night, without a plan! Hey look; my arm really hurts again! Great! We'll call it a pain level of 6+! Girlfriend went to bed at 8 pm because she is so pissed off. Good. I didn't want to deal with her anyway. (When she went to bed, I made her laugh when I said 'You can't go to bed yet--I'm not done disappointing you!'--and that is funny!) She went to bed. Maybe she can dream about my disappointing her! (I'm still the man of her dreams!) Watched many Bill Hicks videos Friday night. It’s 9:30 am Saturday morning, and this fairy tale continues! I went to sleep for a bit, woke up, cried, back to sleep, and woke up at
7 pm Saturday night 11-7-15. Oh, ow! Great arm pain--we're looking at a strong level 7--glad I'm not working tonight! Angry people are protesting Donald Trump hosting Saturday Night Live tonight--that cracks me up! (I guess they're not working tonight either.) "I don't judge."--He says, right before watching all of the rest of the Bill Hicks videos. Up most all of Saturday night, too, but managed to get a couple of hours of beautiful sleep before
noon Sunday 11-8-15. The happy couple walked, with his arm pain level of 6, to the PO Box, and it had mail! Back home to shower, and go pick up Shannon for poker. It ran late; the sky was dark when we left the bar. I came back, because I had to finish. Then I went to get some groceries, almost lost my fake cigarette, and headed home to stay up ALL Sunday night, and into
Monday 11-9-15. No sleep coming. I start to doze, then wake back up. Great. My arm will not quit throbbing either; pain level 6+, at least, with throbs. And I still cannot sleep. My body thinks it's getting sick. Great. And my skin is all itchy. When did I become a heroin addict? The dark brown "brick-snot" coming out of my sinuses is disgusting. Yuck. Oh well; this is my fairy tale. So I would still be up at 4 pm when Cheri got home. Eventually I had to just lay down and fake it. Woke up a few times, and all of a sudden it's
4 am Tuesday morning 11-10-15. Huh? Okay. My whole body aches, and my head is all cloudy, too. Sick? But I don't feel sick. And then we get to see some more of that dark brown snot; oooo. The throbbing arm pain is a regular 6; which sucks, after all that sleep. Pain pills. So I fed piggies, and will now try to figure out what to do at 7 am. Stay tuned. 11 am. I'm in that haze again; might be getting sick. What a day of crap. Eventually I would go to Blairally to pick games for Pinball Knights, then come home and crash out by 3 am. Immense back pain, and many trips to the bathroom; fun. Then we'd be up
Wednesday 11-11-15 by 11 am. Arm pain is a workable 6; I will survive. I walked, cleaned a little, and cooked (because I am amazing--even in pain). Girlfriend came home for some good dinner, and a little more disappointment, woo! Then I cleaned the shower (cleaning is good pain distraction, also good disappointment distraction), and got ready for pinball. Ran pinball, came in 2nd, then came home exhausted. Body pain, twicthing and moaning. Fun. Bed by 3 am. Still not sick, and still having trouble sleeping. Oh the fun! It's like a fairy tale over here!
Up Th 11-12-15 at 9, 10, and 11 am. Foam roll immediately. One tear from each eye, but NOT a full-on cry. I'm a god damn pain poet over here. Shivers and shakes; so I decided to go walk. Good move. Then I tried to cool down by biking to the garden. But all the water has been shut off at the garden. There will be no watering of Garlic Lake for a while. I am stressed about my body and how I am NOT yet being compensated. This sucks. How can I make it through travelling over Christmas? There is no way--not as life is right now. Facebook check. Fuck this; I'm going to kidnap Death Metal and go play pinball. And we did; he even got to see, FIRST HAND, how other drivers completely fuck with me non-stop. And he is very entertaining, as well. Then I went looking for "Quick Oats" for Stat Girl, and came home. There is even bad pain just from sitting now--we're just trying to find the least uncomfortable position to sit in; right leg hurts, left leg is numb. Maybe that's true for most of my body; right side hurts, left side is numb. Simplify the situation. So I can't sleep, as per my usual SOP. I even ate the monster pain pills at 4 am, and I STILL can't sleep (these pills, the flexeril, usually knock me out in less than an hour). Perhaps after Friday morning traffic started I got to sleep. My alarm was set for noon-ish to go to physical therapy at 2 pm. And then I woke up at
3:30 pm Friday 11-13-15; fuck. Did my alarm go off for an hour, and I missed it? Never mind not waking up, my body is totally fucked. Everything hurts (level 7) on the right side; top to bottom. Today's pain is not limb-specific either; great. But I will go forward. I cleaned up the piggie cage, and tried to prepare some dinner. Both of my legs feel weak and lost; no walking today. Girlfriend came home for food and Dr. Who; there is no reason to even bother with impending snuggly disappointment--so we just skipped it, Good. I don't want to go anywhere. I just want to lose some of this fucking pain. No luck. So we'll try to go to sleep by 2 am. No luck. So I got up and bought 40 million fake Zynga poker chips for $15. No sleep until after the sun comes up, AGAIN. Alarm set for 9 am, but
we didn't wake up Sat. 11-14-15 until after 3 pm AGAIN. Great. And my whole body still hurts, top to bottom. Yay! Girlfriend (waited, waited, waited, from 9 am till 2:20 pm, then finally) went to the garden without me. So I met her there. Then I came home to change shoes and go back out shopping. Home for football highlights, and I'm trying to get to sleep at 3 am again. I have to go work with Shannon in the morning. Kill me now. There would be no sleep--there almost never is! So I never slept, but
got up at 8 am Sunday 11-15-15 and left at 8:15 am to go hang out with Shannon. Arm pain at a 6+, but I can't worry about that now. We had some breakfast and football; nice. 4 hours with him. Then I came home and crashed for an hour, before going back to pick him up for poker. 6 for poker, and we made the final 3. I won it, and he was 3rd. Took him home, and went shopping again. Home at 8 pm for dark chocolate raisins (yum) and pro footbal highlights, and I somehow got tired. Great. So I went to bed before midnight. I woke up
at 4:30 am Monday morning 11-16-15 and fed piggies, because girlfriend may be getting sick. Boo. I feel bad for her. But she went to work, and now I am just sitting here at 8 am with my arm pain at the regular 6. If my arm only hurt this bad all the time, and never go numb either--my life would be easier. I would get some producivity done. But it was a groggy day. And my internal body feels we're getting sick. Shit. As soon as I get tired I'm going back to bed. But I had dinner and Dr. Who ready for me and my girl at 4:30 pm. Then it was bed time again. My world is messed up. Up at
10 pm Monday night. This is what my life is like: Bright and bushy at 3rd shift. Great. So I'm up all night again, and it's Tuesday morning. I'm feeding piggies and watching tv where people are invading the U. S. again. You cannot be Syrias! And we're letting them. Great. Send in the clowns, baby. It's just more people for the police to arrest! Went to Walmart and almost got ripped off by a foreign cashier who tried to short-change me. But I wasn't leaving without my money; they're supposed to have cameras for this shit. Screw them. I also went to the bank, and did some other shopping. By noon I was ready for bed, but stayed up until 2pm. Woke up at
8 pm Tuesday night. Insert 3rd shift joke here. My entire body pain is a bit less, which is good. My right arm pain, however, stays strong and continues to demand attention. Arm pain level a 6+. But I'll stay up all night, clean bathroom floors, and feed piggies at 5:30 am again--because that helps Cheri, the poor thing. She can't get 100% well either--some ear problem she's had for years that flares up sometimes, but still she keeps going to work. I wouldn't; ha--after the first 2 days of an ear infection I am done and need anti-biotics. So she went to work at 7 am, and I'm doing laundry and sorting out my stash drawer at 8 am. More shopping is pending. Yes. Lack of an OMMP card limits my purchasing ability at pot pharmacies. I like medibles more than smoking weed--says the pothead in 2015. I still like to smoke weed--I'm not saying that I don't like to smoke weed; I'm just saying that I like medibles more. And I can say that because I am a 50 yr. old man who does NOT like those throat-burning coughs anymore. Give me a pill, or a cookie. Please; and, thank you. So I bought some good weed while my regular supply of it is dwindling. Then back home to imagine new ways to disappoint my parents (according to my Mom). Girlfriend sick; no snuggle. So it's nap time! Sleeping through afternoon traffic continues to be even better than bong hits during morning traffic. I left food out and a quiet house for my sick girl (she likes that), and slept till 6:30 pm.
Up to shower Wed.s 11-18-15 post good nap, arm pain low 6, won 10-person pinball. Got surprised by collecting flower and cookies. One ziplock bag was broken, so it sat like an open grocery sack for at least 8 hours, which bothers ME. However; later, on the next day the supplier assures that I have nothing to fear, (duh, that will be my life's rationale moving forward). But he brings me good cookies; and it's tough to question a commander of good cookies. At home, after panic-rebagging the open container, I sat down at 2 am for the first time since 7:45's dinner on a barstool. Felt great, until the aching set in. No computer. 2 cookies; 1 hour still weak, 2 hours later I had good relief for 2 more hours, but I am stressed about stale weed. Ate more dried fruit, and a whole bag of dried pineapple. Yum. Fed piggies at 5 am, and tried to be productive, but
MY BODY CANNOT DO THE CLEANING THAT I WANT TO DO ANYMORE; I AM LIMITED NOW. THIS SUCKS/NOT FAIR/WAAAAA. BUT MAYBE IT'S A POEM IDEA NOW. I WOULD LOVE TO WRITE A POEM.
I can't clean like the thankful bum I once was, but I can run the damn dishwasher. Yeah! First world solutions, baby! Stayed awake for a few hours, stressed more about stale flower issues, and body injuries resulting from illegal arcade employment. My fairy tale. Slept till 2 pm, bad, Dr. at 3. But the drive to the Dr. was not horrible, maybe because I adjusted my butt pillow in the car. 'Driving butt pillow' is a thing now, and I have to pay attention. I'm 212.3 lbs. fully dressed; regular fat and sad. But not as fat and sad as I have been. So I've got that going for me. Doc was busy; he just wanted to give me scripts, and go. He says 'If you can walk to your car, then you're not disabled.' Okay. So I'm back to west Eugene at 4:45 today--I COULD have made my orginal physical therapy at 5. But it's reset for Sat. at 1 pm; old people talk about Dr.'s appointments and physical therapy. So I went and walked around Walmart slowly, eating chicken strips and a donut; yes, FUCK YOU, I AM THAT GUY! Came home with lots of dried fruit around 6; I'll be ready to attack that shit soon. Some computer and tv time--I'm a rebel. This is when finally I talked to the supplier, and de-stressed a little, then later talked to TPG. Great talking to TPG. Cheri goes to bed quietly at 8 pm, poor thing. Then I got tired while watching recorded tv. Bed at 11 pm. Up
at 2 am Friday morning 11-20-15 for a bit. Arm pain at 6 again, so we're eating a cookie. 1 new cookie makes a nice base to work from. So I'm watching more recorded tv, like an old person. And all of a sudden it's 5 am again; fed piggies. Girlfriend says her ear has healed. Now (7:30 am) I could do bong hits during morning traffic, after sleeping through yesterday's afternoon traffic. I'm in! Then I went shopping, cooked, cleaned, went for a walk, shaved, bottled up half of my new flower, checked in with the hospital for my colonoscopy, also talked to Mom--I did everything but take the nap (oops). I hope that doesn't kill my chances for snuggle today; we'll see. Dinner was actually very good, and there would be tiny bit of disappointing snuggle, too! Then I crashed, hard, at 6 pm. Up
at midnight Friday night 11-20/21-15 (Didn't I used to have a radio show that started Friday at midnight?). I need to clean the kitchen, and then work on relieving this 6+ pain in my entire right arm. Stayed up all night again, with my weirdest conspiracy thoughts yet (we are the aliens), and about how pathetic the human race is. I would eventually take a short nap at 10 am to noon. Then I'm up and heading to P/T. Did great, then bought more jars at Walmart. Just didn't feel right all day, arm pain post-workout was a very nice 5+, like the 1st day of this month! You would think I'd want to celebrate and go play pinball, but I did not. Social anxiety. Came home to watch tv, and eat a cookie. Cheri (correctly) guilted me back onto the dying exercise ball--good for her. Back exercises helped. I just don't want to go outside and do bong hits at these new, below freezing temperatures. Freezing-assed weather is what pain pills, and pot cookies, and fake cigarettes are for! I don't want to go outside; period. It's 11 pm now. I ate sleeping pills, and I am nodding. Breakfast with Shannon tomorrow at 9 am. Nice. Passed out sleep, and up
at 4:30 am Sunday morning. I feel better than I would expect--it could even be a continuation of the wimpy 5+ pain level from yesterday--sweet! I fed piggies, and (finally) went out into the cold for a couple of bong hits. No big deal--but it's my first pot smoke in days! Also; for my comedic brain, I must watch last night's SNL. And Sportscenter. And scoot around looking for other shit on tv; it's what I do. Did the PO Box walk with girflriend at 8 am, and that was nice (I broke a hand-exerciser on my first squeeze, which was hilarious!). We COULD have made out in the romantic fog, but I don't like to kiss (?). Then back home to get ready for a 4-hour shift with Shannon. I also got to eat some food that I don't eat at home (steak)! Came home to clean the shower while showering (smart), then back to pick up Shannon for poker. We both lost, then I'm killing time to come home at 8 pm to watch tv. Experiment hack; I am hanging a bag of vineager on our shower head to try and cklean it. Then I got tired, so I went to bed at midnight.
Up at 5 am Monday 11-23-15 to feed piggies, and try to make life workable for my girl. Arm pain back to 6, but I can live with the regular burning. Soon I'm going shopping. Back from shopping, I did some updating on our cruise. Then I exercised and cooked; ready for girlfriend to come home at 5:30. Dr. Who, dinner, and then I passed out (no snuggle).
Up at 2 am Monday night, with arm pain at regular 6, to start watching the recorded Pats/Bills game. After a few hours, I'm feeding piggies, and then it's 7:30 am. So I had to go get breakfast at Fred Meyer. Now I'm back home, and my dentist'appt. for today has been cancelled. So I'm brewing coffee, bitches! I have found a refurbished HP Windows Stream 7" laptop for $75 (on Amazon). I went to Walmart and Fred Meyer. 1 pm now. I dusted my desk, and cleaned bathroom floors; the bare minimum. Now I'm going to go eat at Izzy's buffet, then go play pinball at Blairally. Okay; did that. Came home at 8 because my back hurt. No phone talking tonight, just moping around, tired and in pain. Screw this, and I went to bed at 11. Up many times to pee and cry for this fun back pain, but then decently asleep by 2 am-ish. Then I woke up at almost 7 am, and FREAKED the fuck out. It's daylight, and I've been sleeping?! How did this happen?! So I did NOT feed piggies for Cheri--she had to do it herself--poor thing. But now I am
awake at 7 am Wednesday 11-25-15, with arm pain right at 6+. Great. But I would run some more errands early, and come home at 10 am to get productive here. I certainly did not go get 2 crunchwrap breakfast thingies in the Taco Bell drive-thru, and a big cup of Dari-mart coffee. Yuck. Got online at home, and called Mom. Talked to her for hours about our cruise. We had so much fun talking; it works well when I just let it all go. I also set up prizes for tonight's pinball party, and talked to Death Metal on the phone. No exercise, and no extra cleaning. But I am still in an okay mood. Dinner and Dr. Who, then I'm out to go rule the pinball night (7th). Done by 11:30 pm. I had to stay and take down a new top score (2.90 bil JCH, so I put up a NEW 2.99 bil) on Dr. Who pinball--no problem. Kenny Mayne is on Sportscenter 3 nights in a row; I am happy! How am I still awake at 7 am Thanksgiving morning? Not for long, baby. Crashed at 8 am. Up just after noon on
Thanksgiving Day 11-26-15, with arm pain of a barely workable 6. Football awaits. Lions, Panthers and Packers are my picks; Panthers will win by at least 20. I will drink coffee, exercise walk, and do what? Can't decide. But Cheri is fasting, so maybe I'll stash snacks in my room--so she doesn't see me eating. I did that; good. And I did not know that Black Friday started at Walmart at 6 pm on Thanksgiving, which is stupid, but okay. I had gone driving around, to give Static Girl some alone time, and saw all the cars at Walmart; so yes, I had to stop. Then I came home to watch recorded football, where I was 2 out of 3. Got tired early, so I went to bed around 10 pm. Tossed, turned, coughed like crazy, AND had ongoing back pain tinges until I got out of bed, and was
up Black Friday morning 11-27-15 at 3 am. 3 nights in a row of Kenny Mayne on Sportscenter concluded Thanksgiving night; boo. Make Kenny full time, ESPN. And it's a balmy 20 degrees here in Eugene this morning; yay life! I would stay up for a few hours, then go back for a nap at 7 am. Up again at 10:30 am to continue my awaken dreams of a right arm that does not constantly hurt. Just take a day off, and see how you like it. No chance. Oh this is fun. But I will exercise walk, and try for some sexual disappointment. It's a party. Next I have P/T at 4:20 pm (new core exercise, ouch), and then I went and wandered around Walmart some more; Fred Meyer, too. Home at 6 pm, and I will start pain relief NOW! So I drank, smoked, and ate pain pills; that's how we deal the body pain adversity, baby. I did some mental configurations, and realized that I am almost, but not quite, getting the recognition I deserve. So; some things must change--but not as many as once thought. I will get through this, and still definitely get my ass kissed--royally. Today may have been the IFC Sweatsgiving Resident Evil marathon I recorded. I also watched some more of the Dan LeBatard show on ESPN; not bad. I hung a baggie of vineager on the shower head to try to clear it, but that didn't work (Wednesday night); so tonight I took the shower head off and soaked it in a bowl of vineagar. I also did some minimal cleaning. Remember how the 3 days of Kenny Mayne on Sportscenter ended last night? I lied; he was on one more night--Friday late! Bed by 3 am, and sleep by 5.
Wake at 10 am Saturday 11-28-15. Right arm pain is only a 6, because I did not sleep on it Friday night. Looks like a lazy day, especially with the stomach burn from the new core exercise at P/T, but, I did my solo walk. And I have promised to walk tomorrow morning. The vineagar bath for the shower head also did not work, and I was upset. But I am not one to let a bowl of anything go to waste (pun intended), so I soaked my most clogged up pipe in the vineagar; ha! I would end up playing pinball at Blairally; this JCH fool has his Dr. Who pinball score up to 3.1 bil now. But do NOT worry about me. Andy G. and Megan B. got to watch a little of my (totally zoned) 3.270 bil (w/159 loops) on Dr. Who pinball. Then I felt better mentally. Came home to start more pain relief for the body. It will be cookies on an empty stomach. I watched the first Resident Evil, and loved it! I'd go to bed by 2 am, with plans to/did
get up by 8 am Sunday 11-29-15 to walk with girlfriend. Arm pain still at 6, unchanged. Great. No time to worry about it, I'm going to Shannon's for breakfast. Did 4 hours with him, got paid/caught up, and then came home to grab pills and go back to get him for poker. The new pillow idea worked great for him; he sat for 3 hours and never complained once. So that is HIS pillow now, maybe. My colonoscopy diet has already begun; oh the fun. Poker was a wash; I was 4th, Shannon bubbled out in 3rd, boo. Rambled around, and stopped at Fred Meyer to find their moved chocolate/peanut butter malt balls, and they had the Tropic Thunder movie for $5. Mine! So it became a pot and pain pill experiment to the movie. I wish there would have been more partying. Eventually I went to bed at 3 am.
Up Monday 11-30-15 at noon to eat a bowl of cooked carrots; then a can of green beans for lunch (colonoscopy diet fun). To distract myself from this arm pain of 6+, I would run errands, then come home to walk, and be totally productive. I mean; I COULD sit and 'waaa' about how bad my arm hurts, or about how badly I'm being screwed over by the business where this occured. But I'm not doing that; I am getting on with my life. Girlfriend came home for dinner and Dr. Who on tv. Then some sexual disappointment (oh baby), and then I cleaned for the first time in weeks. I stayed in for a pain pill and pot cookie experiment. Then I also started drinking, because I am thorough. Eventually my arm pain lesseded. The dirty pipe in the vineagr bowl appears to be cleaning! I watched the rest of movies I had started, and a few Archers; I loves me some Archer. Knowing I had to get up early, I went to bed by 2 am. Sleep by 4. Another month in paradise completed.

Closing Thoughts, and Final Summaries for the month: Early in November I was thinking about how much I should be thankful for, rather than how much the world owes me. And by "the world" I mean the 2 bars that I run activities in, but do not get nearly enough recognition for (And sometimes I get physically abused in one bar, and in the other bar I already have been financially abused.). The hosting bars for my poker and pinball tournaments need to recognize, and reward me better; this is obvious, and has been true for years now. But INSTEAD of all of that bullshit, which I will deal with in my own way, I am trying to be more thankful. It ain't easy to be all-thankful when your body is super fucked up from injuries that can be traced to a certain point in time. And then the business where I was hurt the most decided to take advantage of my resources, AND ongoingly lie to me about many different things. This is some outrageous bullshit, period. But I have allowed it so far because I like the arcade (people will treat you just as shitty as you let them), AND we are trying to get past that, see?..I am TRYING to be more appreciatve with life right now. My life does not suck, at all--aside from the body pain. And (finally) even though I already SHOULD have my renewed OMMP card to buy pot cookies with and such, but I do not. But I DO have plenty of weed to smoke. I (also) DO have some pain pills, and I get some pot cookies sometimes. I AM appreciative of these wonderful things. (Continuing, but different) With the people I really care about; friends and family, I need to be much more concerned with THEIR bigger pictures--since MY big picture is pretty good (aside from body pain). I have been much more pleasant with my Mom (and everyone else) on the phone, and trying to get along with (Shannon's wife) Helen better. Perhaps my efforts are noticed, and perhaps not; but I feel like a better person when I'm not so selfish. Other people are stupid selfish, and fuck them--dry! I want the best possible situations for the people I care about--and that is a quality thing to want. How many 'only children' say super fucking nice community things like this? Not very many. Thank you.

Pinball and Golden Tee stuff: 11-4-15 double-elimination Pinball Knights; 10 people, and I won it ($30)...11-10-15 Pinball Tuesday; Blairally reset all of the high scores on Jurassic Park (because they were tired of looking at my 1.4 billion Grand Champion score), so I had to put up a 938 million new Grand Champion. Ha!..11-11-15 Clark's Format Pinball Knights; 8 people, and I was 2nd...11-12-15 Thursday; Death Metal and I had our first date! We went and played pinball in THREE different places, NONE of which was Blairally...Again Blairally has reset the high scores on Jurassic Park, because they'd rather ANYBODY but me to have the highest score on JP. They rationalized resetting the high scores again to "randomize" the game more, but I like the new randomized Jurassic Park set up. And...wait for it...I have the new "randomized" high score on JP with 641 mil. ha; it makes me giggle...11-18-15 Pinball Knights; 10 people, and I won it all ($30)...11-24-15 Tuesday pinball. Somebody "JCH" put up a low 2.9 billion on Dr. Who. So I put up a slightly higher 2.993 billion--just to fuck with them. I am evil...11-25-15 Thanksgiving Pinball Knights; 12 people, I came in 7th. Fun!..11-28-15 Saturday pinball at Blairally; JCH is up to 3.1 bil on Dr. Who, with 109 loops. So I (NEW) had to put up 3.270 bil, with 159 loops. Good luck JCH!..

Poker stuff: 11-1-15 Shannon's Sunday Poker; 10 people, 2 tables, I came in 5th...11-8-15 Shannon's Sunday Poker; 12 people, 2 tables, lots of bickering and procrastination, and I allowed it! I also went down to TWO chips, but managed to come back and finish in 3rd place (wow)...11-15-15 Shannon's Sunday Poker; 6 people, and I won it ($110)...11-22-15 Shannon's Sunday Poker; 10 people, I bubbled out in 4th...11-29-15 Shannon's Sunday Poker; 5 people, and I came in 4th (I suck).

Grammar: More from the front page of Yahoo: "#1 Reason Not to Buy a New Computer Don’t buy a new PC or call a computer repair company until you saw this..." (yes; until you "saw" this...)...

New foods this month: Did I talk about loving the 'Wild Ginger Harvest' from the bulk food bins? I also like the dried fruit snacks. And I have rediscovered the dark chocolate raisins!..I'm glad they got rid of the chocolate peanut butter malt balls, because I would eat $25 worth of them. Uh-oh. They didn't leave--they just moved to a new bin. So I guess I'm eating $15 worth in 2 nights (11-29+30-15)...

This month of Blues Jamming: Ha.

My trials and trib.s as a critical believer in the concept of God: God is on the dark side of the moon? He IS--if WE are the aliens.

What's different here than in college town: TPG road-tripped all the way to the Taco Stand!..

What's different here than dumbass Arizona: Lots.

What is so cool about Oregon? Oregon reached 3 million in population in 1993. As of November 2015, Oregon just reached 4 million people...

Yes, Oregon's cool and all. Isn't weed also legal? Buying flower is legal, yes. I should be able to purchase anything I would like to (medibles, tinctures, pills, etc.), but cannot, because laws were changed--and I was not informed. So I will try to have a good attitude about this shit; try to be more appreciative. Fuckers.

How Does Your Garden Grow? (Tales from our community garden plot): Water was shut off on 11-12-15. Oh well.

Life with Static Girl: 11-22-15; I haven't cleaned the floors in weeks; how does she put up with it?..We may have added the missing 2 discs to our 5-disc carousel. So it looks like 2 Garbage (garbage and 2.0), and 3 NIN (Broken, How To Destroy Angels, and Fragile right). We like Garbage and NIN...I cleaned floors on Monday 11-30-15...

My FCP has this for me: she's waiting to surprise me with attention...

Comments From The Peanut Gallery: Common Sense Media reports that "Teens spend 9 hours a day with media."...

A thought to take with you: At Walmart they sell $5 DVD's of a fireplace. Think about that...

Nikola Tesla already had created an electricity "cloud" that could encompass the earth. His work was shut down in 1900. Today, 2015, we have a wifi "cloud” for internet, but we still have not duplicated his electricity “cloud”. In a similar orbit; Roswell New Mexico "aliens" in 1947 gave us a strong, foil-like "metal" substance that could be crumpled up, but then would expand back out to its original shape; remember how impressed we were with that stuff? From this metal, we have now invented foil wifi tv screens that can be crumpled (or sat upon), but will return to their original shapes. So; from this "metal" that could make human space travel possible--'Never mind space travel; here's another screen we can stare at.'

'How am I to know you...with a joystick in my hand...when the call to arms has come?'--David Gilmour "In Any Tongue"

"It's too bad that it takes 2 pain pills and 3 bong hits for me to not want to kill people. But that's certainly not my real problem."--W. C. Davis

Oregon Bumper Stickers: "Don't Be A Dick" (Dick Cheney), "Drop Bass, Not Bombs", "Not A Liberal",

Band names: "Hot Pulsing Throbs", "First World Solutions", "Romantic Fog", "Nightmare Scenario" (Dr. Who), "Dead Fish Aisle" (Florida football coach Jim McElwain), "Tripping On Oven Cleaner" (might be more of an album title),







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