Annikasaurus Rex

In the brilliant words of comedian/philosopher Richard Jenni, "Golf's not a sport.".

Boy oh boy; the big money world of rich, fat men who play golf have their "tighty-whities" all up in a bunch now, don't they? This is hilarious to me. And I didn't want to do this commentary, okay? I was going to stay all the way out of this one, and I mean WAY OUT of this one; but the asshole males of this world simply will not shut the fuck up. So, by default, here I am.

It's not like Annika is dunking from the free-throw line, okay? She's not whacking a 95 mph fastball 500 feet either. And she's certainly not rushing for 100 yards in a real football game EVEN ONCE, allright? This is fucking golf; and like bowling, shooting pool, playing pinball, or throwing darts, it is a test of skill, yes, but it is NOT a sport.

She got to play her first round at this event thing (Colonial?) she's trying for this past week. And with the ENTIRE PLANET watching her, she shot a +1. She would have been under par, but she apparently missed a couple of easy putts on the last few holes. I don't remember ever rooting for anybody to play golf well, but I was damn sure rooting for Annika to kick some ass. This story may be over now; I think she missed the final cut. And that's too bad.

Do we really need to split the hairs of PGA and LPGA? I sure hope not. All I can do is leave you with a quote from Annika's playing partner on her +1 day of victory; his name is Aaron Barber, and he said "She's a machine. She's awesome. I've never played with someone over 18 holes who didn't miss a shot.". Thank you, Aaron, for judging her performance--and not her presence. The world could benefit from a few more Aaron Barber's and Overnight Guys.

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